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Freida Pinto In War of The Gods

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Dark haired Slumdog beauty Freida Pinto In War of The Gods? That’s right! Get the details here surrounding the actress’ latest casting and what else she has in the works! Video and photos of Pinto after the jump.

Indian actress and model Freida Pinto is scheduled to play a priestess by the name of Phaedra in War of the Gods.

Meanwhile, here are some worthy links!

Casting the Olympic Movie: Stars of Vancouver 2010! PopEater

Tiger Woods In Drug Rehab! Anything Hollywood

Who went home on American Idol? GiveMeMyRemote

Johnny Depp Doesn’t Shower, Smells Funky! Allie Is Wired

Rozlyn Papa Multiple Sex Tapes Videos Leaked Scandal! Bump Shack

Britney’s Cheeto Makeover. dlisted

Anne Hathaway Nude Scenes in Love and Other Drugs Confirmed! Egotastic

Brad Pitt Spends $10K on Shiloh! HollyScoop

Apolo Ohno Disqualified & Lashes Out At Judges. GabbyBabble

Marie Osmond ‘Devastated’ Over Son’s Suicide. TMZ

Now back to Freida Pinto In War of The Gods…

The movie, directed by Tarsem Singh, is being produced by Gianni Nonnariu and Mark Canton. Also scheduled thus far to appear in War of the Gods is Henry Cavill of Tudors fame.

Cavil will play Theseus, a” young warrior who leads his men into battle with the immortal Greek gods to defeat evil and the powerful elder gods of the Titans in order to save mankind.” Frieda Pinto will serve as a helpful, oracle priestess to Cavill’s on screen leading character. No word yet on when War of the Gods will hit theaters. We’ll keep you posted!

In the meantime the twenty-six year old Pinto is also working on two other film roles in the movie ‘You Will Meet A Tall Dark Stranger’ and Miral, which is being directed by Julian Schnabel.

Tell us, what do you think of Freida Pinto In War of The Gods?

See video and photos of Frieda Pinto below.

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Logan MarshallGreen is Brooklyn’s Finest Actor

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Meet Logan Marshall Green, Brooklyn’s Finest actor and boyfriend of Marisa Tomei. Green has been cast in the cop drama starring Richard Gere and actor Don Cheadle. Get details on his role and the movie below. Video and photos after the jump.

Brooklyn’s Finest, starring Dark Blue’s Logan Marshall Green, centers around three cops whose paths intersect. Green is set to play the character Melvin Panton.

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Due out on the 5th of March, Brooklyn’s Finest also features veteran actor Ethan Hawke, Wesley Snipes and actress Lili Taylor from Six Feet Under. The script was written by Michael C. Martin with Antoine Fuqua in the director’s chair.

The Plot per MTV – “The story surrounds three Brooklyn cops from varying sides of the force who unknowingly converge together at a hot crime spot.”

As a biography Taylor Marshall-Green is Brooklyn’s Finest Actor who was born on the 1st of November in the year 1976, he is thirty-three years old. Green is a native of South Carolina who went on to attend high school in the state of Rhode Island. He stands at the height of 5’11”.

Acting since the earlier half of 2000, Logan is most notable for his role in the teen drama The O.C. as the on screen brother of actor Benjamin McKenzie, Trey Atwood. The actor has also appeared in the on going drama ‘24′ with Keifer Sutherland. He played the character named Richard Hiller.

Aside from the above mentioned roles you can also see Logan in the movie Alchemy as Martin, as well as the flick entitled The Kindness of Strangers where he portrays the character Ray. Most recently Green has been busy working on the set of the TV series Dark Blue as the character Dean Bendis.

See video and photos of Logan Marshall-Green, Brooklyn’s Finest Actor, below.

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Purva Bedi The Adjustment Bureau Actress

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Check out Purva Bedi, The Adjustment Bureau actress! Bedi will star alongside actor Matt Damon in the romance/Sci-Fi movie that is due out this coming Summer . Get details below on Bedi’s role and where she’ll be next with video after the jump!

Actress Purva Bedi has landed a role in the movie The Adjustment Bureau. The actress’ role in the July flick has yet to be announced. Joining Damon, Emily Blunt and Bedi are actors Anthony Mackie, Daniel Dae Kim, Terence Stamp, John Slattery and Shohreh Aghdashloo.

The movie, due out on the 30th of July, feautures the likes of Matt Damon as the character David Norris and Emily Blunt. The premise follows “the affair between a politician (played by Damon) and a ballerina” (played by Blunt) and the “mysterious forces keeping the lovers apart.” The Adjustment Bureau was written by George Nolfi, who also directed te flick, and Philip K. Dick. The storyline takes place in Manhatten.

For more on Purva Bedi and where you can see her next read below…

As a biography Purva Bedi, the ‘Adjustment Bureau’ actress, was born on the 12th of March in 1974. She is thirty-six years old. Bedi attended the Bronx High school in New York and is a graduate of Williams College in Massachusetts.

Purva’s acting roles in both television and film include the long running medical drama ER. She has also appeared in The West Wing, American Desi, Wings of Hope and the CW’s clicky drama Gossip Girls. Bedi’s additional work includes Strong Medicine as Yasmin, Fastlane, banasa, the Drew carey Show, A;lias, and Law and Order: criminal Intent.

More recently Bedi has secured roles in the forthcoming Robert Iscove directed movie entitled Love N Dancing as the character Ritu and Extrospection in the role of Charu.

See video of Purva Bedi, The Adjustment Bureau Actress, below.

Kate Nauta American Actress

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Check out gorgeous Kate Nauta, an American actress! Nauta has several different movie roles in the works. Find out more on where you can see her next. Video and photos after the jump.

HOT Transporter 2 actress Kate Nauta, who recently appeared in Fear Clinic, is currently working on one of her latest roles in the movie entitled Weapons of God.

Weapons of God is due out sometime in 2010 and was written by Hazel D’Jan and Jugdeep. Not much regarding the Sci-Fi movie’s plot has been released, the tagline however says that “He has the power to judge everyone, but he chooses to save us all.” Nauta is scheduled to play the character Ashalmantra while writer D’Jan has taken the role of Angelheart.

For more on Nauta’s additional roles, read more below!

As a biography Kate Nauta is an American actress who was born on the 29th of April in 1982. Nauta is a native of Oregon from the city of Salem. Before beginning her acting career Kate started off as a model at the age of just fifteen years old. She stands at 5’9” with measurements of 34-25-35. Nauta goes by the nickname of Katie.

Since 2005 Nauta has been cast in Transporter 2 as the character Lola and the movie The Game Plan in the role of Tatianna. After taking a two year hiatus, for unknown reasons from the entertainment business, she returned last year in the movie The Good Guy.

You can also catch Kate in the flick Nine Miles Down, and several episodes of Fear Clinic where she plays Jackie. This year the American actress has several new roles lined up. The first being the movie entitled Choose. Next up is The Somnambulist as Nurse Mary and Weapons of God in the role of Ashalmantra.

See video and photos of Kate Nauta, an American actress, below.

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Janina Gavankar The Gates Actress

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Check out Janina Gavankar, the actress appearing in The Gates! Gavankar has been recently cast in the forthcoming supernatural series scheduled to air on the ABC Network. Get details here on Gavankar’s role with video and photos after the jump.

Actress Janina Gavankar has jumped on board with ABC’s new project entitled The Gates. Gavankar, who will reportedly play a cop, joins the new thriller alongside Frank Grillo of Prison Break fame.

The Gates is due out this coming Summer by way of ABC and is being directed by Terry McDonough and Richard Hatem. Grant Scharbo is in charge of the script. The supernatural drama revolves around a:

“big-city cop (played by Grillo) who becomes chief of police in a seemingly tranquil planned community only to discover the residents carry dark secrets.”

Sounds pretty good right? A change of pace for viewers who are sick of the regular routine cop dramas. For more on Janina Gavankar in the meantime you can read below.

As a biography, Janina Gavankar, the actress appearing in The Gates, was born on November 29th in the year 1980. She was born in Joliet, Illinois. Her birth name is Janina Zione Gavankar, she stands at the height of 5’7”.

You may recognize Janina from her roles in the television series Three Rivers, The Cleaner and The L Word where she played the character Papi. Her other acting credits since 2001 also include My Boys, Stargate Atlantis, Grey’s Anatomy and Navy NCIS: Naval Criminal Investigative Services. The Illinois actress has also been featured in the Dollhouse and The League as Shiva.

Next up you can see Janina Gavankar in the flick Indian Gangster as Geeta, Quantum Quest and the picture Custom Mary. She is also working on the movie ‘Men, Interrupted’ as Cece Twain and The 6 Month Rule in the role of Reese.

See video and photos of Janina Gavankar, The Gates actress, below.

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Michelle Borth Matador Actress

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Meet Michelle Borth, Matador actress. The Forgotten star has been picked up to star alongside Friday Night Light’s actor Zach Gilford in a new up and coming Romeo and Juliet story. See video and photos of the beautiful Borth after the jump.

Michelle Borth has taken a lead role in the drama entitled Matadors. Borth will co-star alongside Zach Gilford, her new on screen boyfriend from the family her parents love to hate!

The families, who both work in the field of Law are reported enemies. A release date for the Matadors have yet to be announced as the creators are still working on the remainder of the cast. In the meantime learn about Borth below.

As a biography Michelle Borth, Matador actress, was born on the 19th of August in 1978. Borth is best known for her work in Tell Me You Love Me as Jamie as well as the series entitled The Forgotten in the role of Candace Butler.

Borth has been working in TV and the movies since the earlier part of 2000. With a handful of guest stints under her belt, Michelle has been cast in Center of the Universe, the sitcom Freddie starring Freddie Prinze Jr. and Brian Austin Green, the long runnin criminal drama Law and Order as well as the Benjamin Brat series on A&E entitled The Cleaner.

Michelle’s other work includes the movie Apartment as watermelon girl. She has also worked on the set of Wonderland as Sonia, The Sisterhood as Devin, Rampage: The Hillside Strangler murders and Trespassers.

This year you can catch Borth in the up and coming Matadors series and the movie by the very creative name ‘A Good Old Fashion Orgy’ in the role of Sue Plummer.

See video and photos of Michelle Borth, Matadors actress, below.

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Colin Egglesfield The Good Guy Actor

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Meet HOT Colin Egglesfield, The Good Guy actor! The performer has also just joined the cast of Brrothers and Sisters after leaving Melrose Place. Get all the details here on Egglesfield with video and photos after the jump.

Actor Colin Egglesfield has been making his move in both the television and movie industry these days. The up and coming performer has not only signed on to star as William Walker on Brothers and Sisters, he’s also secured a role in ‘The Good Guy’ alongside Alexis Bledel of Gilmore Girls fame and Bryan Greenberg of October Road. Get the movies premise and the run down on who Colin is below.

Also scheduled to appear in the movie is My Girl starlet Anna Chlumsky and Scott Porter from Friday Night Lights.

Per IMDb The Good Guy centers around an:

“Ambitious young Manhattanite and urban conservationist Beth (Bledel) wants it all: a good job, good friends, and a good guy to share the city with. Of course that last one is often the trickiest of all. Beth falls hard for Tommy (Porter), a sexy, young Wall Street hot-shot. But just as everything seems to be falling into place, complications arise in the form of Tommy’s sensitive and handsome co-worker Daniel (Greenberg). Beth soon learns that the game of love in the big city is a lot like Wall Street — high risk, high reward and everybody has an angle.” Written by Roadside Attractions

As a biography Colin Egglesfield, The Good Guy actor, was born in Dearborn, Michigan on the 9th of February in the year 1973. Aside from acting, Colin is passionate about martial arts. He stands at the height of 6’ with dark feautures that has scored him plenty of attention by his female fans!

A series regular on the new revamped Melrose Place, Egglesfield has been part of the cast since 2009 playing the role of Auggie Kirkpatrick until this year. He was also a recurring character in the soap opera drama ‘All My Children’ for four years as the character Joshua Madden.

Colin’s additional acting credits over the years in both television and movies include the long running and very quirky Gilmore Girls, 12 Days of Terror, S.W.A.T, the tv series Nip/Tuck, and the movie entitled ‘Vampires: The Turning’ as the character Connor.

See video of Colin Egglesfield, The Good Guy actor below with photos as well.

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Andrew Koenig Disappearance

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Growing Pains actor Andrew Koenig is missing. Get the latest here on the search and details behind Koenig’s disappearance. Video after the jump.

Forty-one year old actor Andrew Koenig who played Richard “Boner” Stabbone on Growing Pains has disappeared and hasn’t been seen since the 14th of February when he let for
Vancouver.

Koenig, born Josh Andrew Koenig, reportedly left his home in Venice, California on a trip to visit friends in Vancouver. For the last nine days his family and friends from home haven’t heard a word from the actor.

“We last spoke to him on Feb. 8 or 9th,” his mom said. “I had some surgery and he phoned from Toronto to see how I was doing, but he sounded a little distant,” she said. “I only want to say he’s a really good person, a great humanitarian,” he said. “Everyone who knew him was very fond of him. He was not in a good frame of mind when he called us. He was depressed.”

The actor’s loved one say that Andrew Koenig’s disappearance is also cause for concern since the former child star has been in a state of depression, selling his belongings before he left town. His family says he has been sad and withdrawn and they are concerned about his welfare. News of the star’s disappearance became public knowledge this past weekend so that police could be alerted to new information.

“He went up to [Vancouver] to visit friends who last saw him on the 14th,” the actor’s sister Danielle Koenig tells Zap2it. “Any information we can get on his whereabouts would be helpful.”

Koenig was due back home on a flight scheduled for February 16th but never boarded the plane. Activity on both his cell phone and bank accounts have ceased since the 16th of February as well.

Andrew Koenig’s acting credits include Growing Pains, Sanctuary, Star Trek: Deep Space Nine and Batman: Dead End. Andrew is the son of Star Trek alumni Walter Koenig.

See video of Andrew Koenig disappearance below.

Kristin Kreuk Is Hitched

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Street Fighter actress Kristin Kreuk is Hitched! The brunette performer is jumping back into television to take on a new role in the latest CBS comedy pilot by creator Josh Schwartz. Get the details on Kreuk’s latest role on the way with video and photos after the jump.

Twenty-seven year old actress Kristin Kreuk is making her way onto prime time in the tv series ‘Hitched’. The actress, who reportedly let Smallville to persue a movie career was last seen in Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun-Li and Euro Trip, is taking a lead role in the Josh Schwartz comedy pilot on CBS.

Hitched comes by way of Chuck and The OC creator Josh Schwartz who wrote the pilot with Matt Miler. The story follows a pair of newlyweds (played by Kristin Kreuk and actor Jack Carpentar from I Love You, Beth Cooper) Rachel and Bret Applebaum who must deal with the real world after only a 9 month courtship and honeymoon under their belt.

Also scheduled to appear in the comedy is American Pie actor Eugene Levy, the groom’s father and divorcee who is still out chasing the ladies! So far the remainder of the cast or when the show will premiere has yet to be announced since the thirty-minute series is still in development.

Kristin Kreuk’s other acting roles to date include Smallville as Lana Lang for eight seasons. The Vancouver native was also a regular in the series Edgemont for four years as the character Laurel Yeung. Her additional roles also include The Weekenders, Earthsea, Chuck in the role of Hannah, Paritition and the reported upcoming TV production Ben Hur.

Tell us, what do you think of Kristin Kreuk in Hitched? Drop us a line below.

See video of actress Kristin Kreuk below with photos to follow.

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Back Nine On Spike TV

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Back Nine on Spike TV is looking good and comes just in time with the Tiger Woods saga a buzz! Get details here on the upcoming golf series starring John Schneider and a possible Miguel Nunez! Videos and photos after the jump.

Spike TV is bringing ‘Back Nine; to fruition after a year long wait. The TV series

The series comes right on the heels of the on going Tiger Woods saga and his recent apology for his actions. The Spike TV series is said to have signed on none other than Clark Kent’s father, actor John Schneider. The veteran actor has recently been seen in 90210, The Secret Life of the American Teenager and Nip/Tuck.

Schneider will play the role of Ronnie Barnes, a former golf star whose best friend is the bottle. Barnes’ caddy is no better! Played by actor Miguel Nunez of 17 Again fame, he’s a reported sex addict with a similar disposition to the likes of Tiger Woods. This should be good! Think Californication meets Bagger Vance!

Spike TV’s attempt is to gain more of a male audience when it comes to viewership. And I think they’ll be quite successful when it comes to Back Nine. Schneider alone will commandeer his own fans after years of appearing in such hits as Dukes of Hazzard, Smallville and more.

Back Nine on Spike TV comes by way of writers Jason Filardi and Mark Perez. I for one will be tuning in especially with Schneider involved in the project. Drop us a line and tell us what you think? Is the show’s premise tacky in the wake of theTiger Woods events? Will you be watching?

Watch video of John Schneider, star of Back Nine on Spike TV, below with photos.

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Eddie Redmayne London actor

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Eddie Redmayne, London actor, is commanding attention all over the web with his recent role in The Yellow Handkerchief. Find out more on Redmayne below and where he’ll be popping up next. Video after the jump.

Actor Eddie Redmayne is stepping into the limelight with his recent roles. Now the twenty-eight year old, who played Gordy in The Yellow Handkerchief, is headed for Black Death as Osmund.

The movie follows “the first outbreak of bubonic plague in England, a young monk is tasked with learning the truth about reports of people being brought back to life in a small village.” Directed by Christopher Smith, Redmayne is set to star alongside Sean Bean, Kimberley Nixon and actress Carice van Houten. The flick is scheduled to be released in the UK on the 28th of May, 2010.

For more on Eddie read below and check out the trailer of TYH.

As a biography Eddie Redmayne, London actor, was born on the 6th of January in the 1982. Born in the United Kingdom, Redmayne stands at 5’11” and is an award winner for being an Outstanding Newcomer at the London Evening Standard Awards.

Redmayne began his acting career back in 1998 when he appeared in Animal Ark as John Hardy before moving on to star in Doctors as Robert Huntley. He has since pursued roles in Elizabeth I, Like Minds, The Good Shepard and Savage Grace. The actor’s additional credits include Elizabeth: the Golden Age as the character Thomas Babington and William Stafford in the movie ‘The Other Boleyn Girl’.

Most recently the actor has worked on the 2009 movie Powder Blue alongside Jessica Beil and the flick Production 39. Currently he is filming The Pillars of the Earth portraying the character Jack Jackson. You can also catch Eddie in the upcoming road trip drama, The Yellow Handerkerchief!

See video of Eddie Redmayne, London actor, below.

Megan Joy In Hall Pass

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

American Idol alumni Megan Joy is in Hall Pass! Get the latest details here on the singer’s first movie role alongside the hilarious Owen Wilson and Amanda Bynes. You can also check out video and photos after the jump.

American Idol season 8 star Megan Joy has shared the good news about her first ever movie role via Twitter. Joy has been cast in the 2011 comedy movie Hall Pass.

The movie is being directed by the popular Bobby and Peter Farrelly; the pair also penned the screenplay together. Hall Pass centers on a married man who is given the go ahead by his wife to have an affair!! “Joined in the fun by his best pal, things get a little out of control when both wives start engaging in extramarital activities as well.”

“So maybe I fly out to Georgia in a couple weeks CAUSE I GOT A LITTLE ROLE IN THAT MOVIE!!!! Ahhh”, tweeted Joy.

Aside from American Idol contestant Joy, Owen Wilson and Amanda Bynes of What I Like About You fame, Hall Pass also stars the likes of actress Jenna Fischer, Jason Sudeikis and Melissa LeEllen. Charmed star Alyssa Milano and Christina Applegate are also rumored to be on board the project.

“Um HELL YES Ill audition for your new movie Farrelly Brothers!!!!!! I cant freaking believe they even know my damn name!!! Best email ever.”

Production on the comedy is said to have already began in Georgia with the movie due out sometime next year.

Days ago Megan updated fans via Twitter – “sheesh its been a wild few days! At the airport now, Oh Hollywood. reading for that Farrelly Bros movie today! keep fingers crossed!!”

Tell us, what do you think of Megan Joy in Hall Pass?

See video of Megan Joy with photos below.

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Madison Burge American Actress

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Have you seen Madison Burge, an American actress? FNL fans know her as Becky. Find out more on Burge here, where’s she’s headed next and more. Video after the jump.

Actress Madison Burge is a familiar face you may not know that much about. A regular this past season on FNL, Madison has also just wrapped up work in the movie entitled Wasting Away. The young actress is also credited for penning the storyline alongside director Mitch Collier.

The movie, which follows “the story of two teenage girls whose lives and friendship fall apart after they begin abusing heroin”, is directed by Mitch Collier with Burge and Ashley Stewart in the two lead roles.

As a biography, Madison Burge, an American actress, was born in 1991 on October 17th. She is a Texas native who graduated from Round Rock Christian Academy. Now a series regular on Friday Night Lights, Burge has worked with filmmaker Kat Chandler.

Currently she portrays the character Becky Sproles, who is madly in love with bad boy Tim Riggins played by Taylor Kitsch. Aside from her gig on the Direct TV football drama, Burge has also appeared in several movie productions and performed on the stage of both the Austin Paramount Theater and the Sam Bass Theater.

Recently Burge appeared in the 2009 flick One More Chance. She is also credited for acting and writing the script fort the forthcoming picture Wasting Away. The young starlet has also made appearances in the 2007 movie Trick or Treat as well as the 2005 picture entitled Dear Viddy. Check out Burge when Friday Night Lights returns for its fifth and final season on Direct TV. The actress (per her facebook page) sounds as though her character Becky will be returning alongside fellow castmates Kyle Chandler, Connie Britton, Jesse Plemons and Aimee Teegarden.

See video of Madison Burge below.

Veronica Russell The Yellow Handkerchief Actress

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Check out actress Veronica Russell! Russell will be appearing in the upcoming drama The Yellow Handkerchief. Get details on the actress’ role and the movie’s plot here! Video and photos after the jump.

Actress Veronica Russell is slated to play Warden Genaro in the drama entitled Yellow Handerkerchief. The movie is set to hit the big screen in select cities.

Directed by Udayan Prasad, the movie involves the classic road trip “through Louisiana, transforming three strangers who were originally brought together by their respective feelings of loneliness.”

Set to star in the flick, which was written by both Erin Dignam and William Hurt is actors William Hurt, Maria Bello, Twilight’s Kristen Stewart, Eddie Redmayne and Emmanuel Cohn.

Per the movie’s website the movie is – “A love story at its core, THE YELLOW HANDKERCHIEF is about three strangers of two generations who embark on a road trip through post-Katrina Louisiana. Along the way, relationships forge and change in a myriad of ways, leading to the possibility of second chances at life and love.

As a biography, here is what we know about Veronica Russell. To date Veronica has appeared in the horror film Blood Feast 2: All U Can Eat. She has also appeared in Infidelity and Zombie vs. Mardi Gras.

Russell has since gone on to star in Miracle Run as the character Ms. Gabler. In Heart of the Storm, Russell played the role of Lieutenant Donna Broadbeck before moving on to the 2004 production by the name of Malachance.

A year later she was cast in the TV production Heartless as a reporter. Most recently Veronica has worked on the set of the above mentioned movie and Angels Die Slowly. The actress is also on board to appear as a prostitute in Jonah Hex, the story of “the Wild West and scarred bounty hunter tracks a voodoo practitioner bent on liberating the South.”

See video of Veronica Russell & The Yellow Handkerchief below.

Hannah Marks is The Runaways Actress

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Have you seen Hannah Marks? She isThe Runaways actress! The seventeen year old performer joins the cast of Dakota Fanning, Kristen Stewart and more. Get the details on Marks’ role with video after the jump.

Actress Hannah Marks has taken on the role of Tammy in the upcoming Rock n Roll movie entitled ‘The Runaways’. The movie is based on the book Neon Angel written by Runaway’s lead singer Cherrie Currie.

The Floria Sigismondi directed biopic will cover the rise and fall of The Runaways back in the 70’s as they became rock icons at the young age of just sixteen years old.

Set in for release on the 19th of March, Marks joins a terrific cast line up of Kristen Stewart who plays Joan Jett. Also on board is Dakota Fanning as Cherie Currie, Alia Shawkat in the role of Robin and Scout Taylor-Compton as Lita Ford. For more on Hannah Marks read below.

As a biography, here is what we know about Hannah Gayle Marks. The Runaways actress was born on the 13th of April in the year 1993. Marks’ is a California native from Santa Monica.

Hannah made her professional acting debut at the age of twelve years old in the movie entitled Doll Graveyard. She has since gone on to appear in Numb3rs, as a guest character by the name of Libby Lamberg before taking a role in the crime drama Criminal Minds.. She has also been cast in The Winner as Tracy.

Marks has since gone on to star in the short lived series Heartland on TNT, the series Private Practice, Ugly Betty, and Lucy: A Period Piece as the character Lucy. Mark’s additional roles include a seven episode arc in the TV series entitled Weeds on Showtime. The young actress played Harmony.

Most recently you can check out the California actress in Hank as Taylor Kelly, Saving Grace as Mae Rodriguez and her upcoming stint in the Runaways.

See video (with photos here) of Hannah Marks, The Runaways actress, below.

Motioncapturing an Oscar

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Kristin here:

Six years ago, when The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King was nominated for eleven Oscars, there was considerable grumbling over the fact that Andy Serkis was absent from the acting categories. Many argued that his pivotal role in creating Gollum, the first convincing human-like computer-generated character, should have qualified him for a nomination.

Now we’re seeing a similar debate over the lack of actor nominations for Avatar, with Zoe Saldana’s performance as Neytiri especially mentioned as unfairly overlooked. An intriguing article on the subject appeared in the Los Angeles Times a few days ago. In it, James Cameron expresses annoyance with both the Screen Actors Guild and the Academy for the lack of nominations for his actors:

I’m not interested in being an animator. . . . That’s what Pixar does. What I do is talk to actors. ‘Here’s a scene. Let’s see what you can come up with,’ and when I walk away at the end of the day, it’s done in my mind. In the actor’s mind, it’s done. There may be a whole team of animators to make sure what we’ve done is preserved, but that’s their problem. Their job is to use the actor’s performance as an absolute template without variance for what comes out the other end.

Because of innovations in the motion-capture process, including a tiny camera hung in front of an actor’s face to capture its every nuance, Cameron insists on calling the new technology “performance capture.” In some sense it may be true that the performance is preserved, but once the film runs through the theater projector, can the audience really tell what that “template” was like? I think not, and that’s why there is a reluctance to nominate these actors.

Where is the elusive boundary?

Don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying that Zoe Saldana and Andy Serkis aren’t fine performers or that their acting did not contribute enormously to the characters they played. Indeed, Serkis’ mo-cap contribution to the creation of Gollum was originally intended to be far more limited than it turned out to be. His facial expressions and gestures were so useful to the special-effects people that he was involved for a much longer period, and techniques to allow him to perform onset with the other actors were developed.

But however fine the original acting and however great the aid it provides to the special-effects team are, the process doesn’t stop there. To a notable degree other factors intervene between the actors’ original performances and the characters’ final appearance on the screen. Let’s do some comparisons, using the publicity images that the studios themselves considered good indications of how close the expressions of original actors were to those of their characters.

Take the widely circulated image of Saldana juxtaposed with Neytiri shown above. There are numerous differences. For a start, the filmmakers obviously needed to make the Na’vi look like an alien species. They didn’t just give them tails and make them blue and really tall. Human as the creatures seem in many ways, their faces have a subtle suggestion of large felines.

The effectiveness of Neytiri’s snarl has a lot to do with the fact that she has been given exaggeratedly long canine teeth. Moreover, given the changes in the shape of the face, the mouth is not as large proportionately to the entire head as Saldana’s is; the tongue is not nearly as prominent or noticeable. Both tongue and lips are blue as well. All of these features allow the teeth stand out more by contrast.

Na’vi ears are pointed, and some of the lobes are apparently pierced with a small dark disk in the hole. Saldana’s ears played no role in her performance, but the laid-back ears in the Neytiri image, mimicking those of an enraged animal, contribute considerably to the shot’s impact. I remember noticing them while watching the film.

The nose and the wrinkles on and above it have been considerably changed. Unlike human noses, those of the Na’vi are smaller at the bottom than at the top, somewhat resembling lions’ noses. The wrinkles seem to be derived from canine or feline faces as well, extending from the inner end of the eye and arcing down toward the tip of the nose. The human frown lines at the lower center of Saldana’s forehead are transformed into larger, longer, curved wrinkles at either side; these start between the eyebrows and move up and to the sides. There they get extended by the curved areas of darker blue that radiate across the upper forehead, so that the lines of anger seem to cover more of the face. I suspect that relatively little of what the actors did with their noses has survived the special-effects processing. (In the image below, even the shape of Saldana’s naso-labial folds has been slightly altered.)

The change in the eyes is particularly important. Saldana’s eyes have dark irises within which the pupil is barely, if at all, visible. Na’vi eyes are much larger, to begin with, and the irises are light in color, a sort of yellowish tan. The irises fill more of the visible part of the eye, so that the whites of Na’vi eyes are minimized. As a result, the black pupil stands out dramatically. In terms of color, the model seems to be cats’ eyes, though the pupils remain round rather than slits, to avoid making the Na’vi too alien looking. Since the nose has been widened at the top, the eyes are also further apart than on human faces. (The norm with humans is for the eyes to be separated by a distance roughly equal to the width of one eye.)

Even in a less dramatic scene, when Neytiri is relaxed and smiling, some of these differences remain. The pointed ear is not laid back, but it sticks out from the side of the head at an angle that draws the spectator’s attention and makes the human-shaped face seem exotic–especially given that the Na’vis’ ears are placed higher on the skull than human ears are: while the human ear canal is about even with the cheekbone, in the Na’vi it opens at mid-temple level. Although the points of the canine teeth are not visible in this image, the teeth remain prominent because of their bright whiteness against the blue skin. Though partially masked by the headgear, the vaguely feline nose still differs considerably from Saldana’s. In keeping with the extraordinary height of these beings, Saldana’s neck has also been lengthened.

Again, I’m not saying that Saldana and the other actors in Avatar did not contribute enormously to the believability of their characters or that they did not aid us to empathize with them. On the contrary, although the big blue creatures did seem very odd in the trailers and posters, I have to admit that they quickly came to seem like real characters. Their design’s balance of human and alien is remarkably balanced. I did not continually think of them as walking combinations of numerous elaborate special effects. The new facial-capture system renders expressions very well, as the frame at the bottom shows.

What I’ve pointed out here with relation to Saldana’s contributions to the creation of Neytiri applies as well to Serkis’ earlier contributions to Gollum. In the comparison images below, similar changes were made.

While Serkis’ ears were covered, Gollum’s are pointed and prominent. Here, too, the eyes have been enlarged and made a light blue so that the pupils stand out. Where the actor’s teeth are straight and even, Gollum’s are pointed, crooked, and separated by gaps. The cheeks have been hollowed and the eyebrows arched nearly to a point near their outer ends. Crucially, the body has been made inhumanly skinny, with long bony legs and arms that are not apparent in this image. I suspect that some naive audience members believed that a real actor had played Gollum, but to most the scrawny figure was a guarantee that no human could have performed the role. (The very thin waists of the extraterrestrials in District 9 served as a similar guarantee that these were not just guys in monster suits à la Invaders from Mars.)

With all the kinds of changes that I’ve pointed out, how would Academy members be supposed to judge these performances were they to be nominated in the traditional acting categories? Where is the boundary between acting and special effects? Despite actors’ and directors’ claims to the contrary, the movements and expressions caught by performance capture are changed in many obvious and not so obvious ways. A close inspection of the comparison photos reveals the details of the transformation, but in watching the film, the viewer cannot necessarily gauge what sorts of changes were made. I can well imagine that actors like Meryl Streep or Jeff Bridges would be justified if they objected to competing in the same Oscar category as what are essentially hybrid performances seamlessly combining the original acting and the digital transformation.

Possible new categories

One way I can imagine actors competing for awards would be for the Academy to create a separate category for motion-capture performances. To judge such performances fairly, the members would have to see videos running the original performance side-by-side with the finished film. This method might allow them to make a reasonable assessment of what the actor truly contributed.

At this stage in the history of film technology, such a category seems unlikely. So far, not that many people have been spoken of as deserving an Oscar nomination for a mo-cap performance. Even Bill Nighy, who was widely praised for his turn as Davy Jones in the second Pirates of the Caribbean film, was not touted as a possible nominee—probably because his face was so thickly covered with tentacles and partly because comic fantasy films tend not to be Oscar bait. So far the argument has primarily been made for Serkis and Saldana. Plus if the Academy did take the approach of requiring the sort of comparison film I’ve suggested, it would be a difficult and expensive thing to produce. Who knows whether Academy voters would watch five such films?

Maybe, though, as performance capture becomes less expensive and more widely used, there will be enough actors to make up a separate category. We’ve seen the animated-feature category grow from three to five nominees this year, and the number of such films being made suggests that five will become the norm. Animated films and live-action ones heavily dependent on motion-capture are somewhat similar technically, so a new category makes some sense.

A simpler and more logical alternative might be to create a category specifically for vocal performances. As has been pointed out in relation to animated films, an actor who is heard but never seen onscreen could in principle be nominated. Such a thing has never happened, but it’s not against the rules. (It’s easy to imagine that it could have happened for a performance like Celeste Holm’s unseen narrating character in Letter to Three Wives.) But with animated-feature and motion-captured performances becoming more common, a best-vocals category seems to make sense. After all, Serkis and Saldana and others like them do speak their characters’ lines, and their voices are typically not altered or enhanced very much. The digital manipulation of sound still lags considerably behind that of images.

The idea is not exactly a new one. The Annies, the awards given out each year by the International Animated Film Society, has two “Vocal Acting” categories, one each for film and television.

Very similar motion-capture technology can be used to create films that most people would agree are animated (The Polar Express, A Christmas Carol) and others that embed animated characters in a live-action setting (The Lord of the Rings, Avatar). Creating an Oscar category for vocal acting in animation or motion-captured, effects-based performances would make sense.

If actors are not yet being recognized for motion-captured performances, the Academy has been quick to honor the top scientific and technological innovators of the area of motion capture. In 2004, when The Return of the King won its golden statuettes, the less celebrated Academy technical awards included one to the Weta Digital team for its new approach to the creation of Gollum. (The award was shared with ILM for its similar use of the technique in creating Jar Jar Binks.) This year, on February 20, the Academy honored a team that included one Weta Digital member for “the design and engineering of the Light Stage capture devices and the image-based facial rendering system developed for character relighting in motion pictures” which was used on Avatar and The Curious Case of Benjamin Button.

Despite fears that motion-capture may someday make directly photographed actors obsolete, there seems little chance of that happening. These techniques are fantastically expensive and are likely to remain that way for some time to come. There seems little point to using such elaborate technology to make an actor look like a real person when traditional cameras can do it so much more easily, so motion-capture performances seem suitable primarily for fantasy beings who cannot be as believably created in any other way.

Thanks to Cathy Root for calling my attention to the Los Angeles Times article.

[February 25: See also Mark Harris' essay in Entertainment Weekly that ineffable qualities of an actor's performance simply cannot be conveyed through motion-capture.]

Ill be sorry but I dont care

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Click images for desktop size: "Haiku On Hanami" by April Joy E Jasmin My mother used to be terrified that she, being only fifteen years older than me and divorced, was going to deprive me and traumatize me. The only book, the only resource for new mothers then was Doctor Spock. She couldn't go to her mother for advice. My grandmother hadn't talked to her since my mother's divorce. So my mother fumbled around and did the best she could figure out.
Sometimes this entailed taking me to work with her. When she was working at the concession counter at the drive-in movie theater going with her was very cool. I would sit at a picnic table on a concrete slab by the projection booth, right next to a blaring metal loud speaker and float into the movies while my mom's teen co-workers inundated me with sugar-y soda, popcorn and ice cream.
It was in that state that I first saw "Godzilla". A warm California night, the sea breeze and eucalyptus scenting the air and sixty feet of city munching reptile destroying everything adults hold dear. Perhaps my still holding love affair with Japanese jidai-geki movies has more to do with remembering a mother's love than it does my fondness for giant lizards and men in rubber suits. I wouldn't know. I'm more Adlerian than Freudian.
I liked monster movies. So did my mother but she worried so her next big plan to keep me from being deprived was a subscription to The Children's Book Club.
This was some weird thing, probably from an ad in "Teen Mom's Weekly". For fifty nine cents a copy your child, meaning me, got a hard cover classic of children's literature.
They were cheaply printed things. Thing I remember most were the super ragged edges of the pages. But I liked the books. I liked the stories in them. Classics is a pretty broad term. There were Hardy Boys stories, strange science fiction and "Alice's Adventures In Wonderland". I really liked that book at age 7. I liked the pictures and I liked the horrible things that happened to the little girl.

Click images for desktop size: "Purple Vectors" by Unknown At that stage of my life torturing little girls was a major part of my entertainment. Not real torture but stuff like dropping snails down their backs, stealing the heads from their dolls. Typical stuff. The one girl who thought it was cool and fought back instead of shrieking and threatening to tell on me became a life long friend.
So I liked that all the animals yelled at Alice, picked on her and tormented her. It kept my interest up.
I read that book and re-read it then got on with surfing, torturing little girls etc. In high school someone gave me a copy of Martin Gardener's "The Annotated Alice". I don't remember who. It took me a long time before I started reading it. When I did start to get into it I was enthralled. It started my trek into Lewis Carroll fandom.
I recently got a copy of Jenny Woolf's new book, "The Mystery of Lewis Carroll". It's a bit dry but it attempts to debunk some of the more bizarre suppositions about Charles Dodgson like that he was actually Jack the Ripper. It also attempts to tackle the issue of his being a pedophile. That has always driven me crazy. I've read some persuasive arguments for it being so and I've tried to accept that he was a pedophile who never actually improperly touched or harmed a child.
That goes against my knowledge of pedophiles. When I took my training to help abused kids part of it was attending group therapy sessions and listening to child abusers. I think the plan was to get us trainees to have some compassion and empathy for the offensive
Click images for desktop size: "Audrey Hepburn" offenders.
It didn't have any such effect. I have been alone with thrill killers, reputed Mafia hitmen, drug addicts, prostitutes and movie stars. At some level I've always felt a bond of humanity. Sometimes it was tenuous and difficult but it was always still there.
Prior to my meeting the child abusers the group I felt most distant from were the hard core crack addicts. They were so lizard brained that any cloudy memory they had of being human was only called on to try and manipulate.
Child abusers, the ultimate victimizers, didn't have even that. To me they were an alien insect race that would be best served with a claw hammer and a room draped in plastic.
They have no control over their actions. They must abuse. So sordid and ingrained is their delusion that they speak often and in agreement that children are sexual seducers who lure them into the abusers horrific attacks and fantasies.
The thing is that they were all like this, all out of control. Even chemical and physical castration has not deterred child molesters from attacking children.
No matter how convincing the arguments it was hard, nearly impossible for me to put Dodgson in
Click images for desktop size: "Rise on an Angel" by Titusboy this category, this misshapen lump. I could not even accept that he was a pedophile who had somehow managed to NOT harm children.
Ms Woolf's book tries to address this issue while presenting an image of Carroll full and deep. She uses a few newly discovered letters, gets some interesting interpretations of available data from MD's and such and uses a unique and solid bit of hard evidence.
She uses forensic accounting. Recently discovered are the complete bank records for Dodgson. From the first penny he spent till the decimation of his estate at his death. Financial records.
It seems odd. But so did bringing down Al Capone's empire based on his financial records. It paints a picture of Carroll and Dodgson that I am much more in agreement with that any other previous. Meaning it jibes most closely to my own perceptions of a major part of my pantheontology.
Woolf's writing style is a bit dry and prosaic but her observations are keen, her conclusions are only pedantic when strongly supported by evidence. It makes a good read and provides at least for the fans, which I am, a nice amount of dream time considering Dodgson/Carroll. My only complaint is that a bit too many words are spent rejecting some of the more inane conclusions about Dodgson.

I went for my stress tests on Wednesday. Interesting stuff. They made the mistake of leaving me alone in a room too long. I found a remarkable plastic model of a heart. It was dumped behind some boxes in a cupboard. I coveted it and considered stealing it. I didn't. Not because of any high handed moral arguments or out of fear but because it occurred to me that it might only appear to be discarded and might be of service to some other poor slob stuck in my kind of hell.
The stress tests themselves were not all that difficult. The first one was on a treadmill. I was out fitted with all the ekg terminals and an x-ray machine was pointed at my chest.

Click images for desktop size: "Untitled" by Wally Wood It was hard getting my pulse over 100. Not that I'm that fit but because the treadmill didn't offer up enough resistance and I was ordered to not bend over too much to accelerate so that the x-rays would hit the right spot.
After that we went to the stair masters. Due to my chemotherapy history they eschewed x-rays. Didn't want to blast me with too much radiation in case I turned into a super hero I bet. So this time I climbed the unending staircase and was monitored by electrodes and sound waves. I could see the sonogram as I worked out. It was so incredibly cool looking at my heart beat. In motion I was trying to control it and make it do interesting things. That got me yelled at.
Don't have all the results yet but what there is is good. My heart has healed. There are abnormalities but they have to be looked for rather than appearing as distorted lines and squibbles.
My vitals are all good. they doubled my blood pressure meds. Rah. My BP was 120 over 60, but they decided they want it even lower! Part of this is due to the congestive heart failure I had with the Lyrica. Then my BP was hovering around 190 over 80 due to all the fluid in my chest compressing everything. Getting my standard BP even lower will enable me to endure a real congestive heart attack (that's what killed my grandmother when she was 98 . . .) They said I was on an extremely minmal dosage anyway and this would still have me below average.
Now I just wait for the rest of the results and the fitness and fury.
Just wanted to mention my puppy. She's continued to be wonderful. She's crazy and calm by turns. When I'm feeling more under the weather than usual she's protective. When I'm feeling better she's bossy and obnoxious, demanding her way. She's my friend.
She's been on a diet. She hates it. But we went to the pet store yesterday and she has lost nearly TWO POUNDS! Bringing her weight down to 71! Only six more pounds to go till she is her ideal weight!
She could care less about ideal weight. She'd rather have ice cream at all of her meals.

Breaking Tweet Whitney Port?s Fav Snacks

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

The City star Whitney Port made a list of her favorite snacks. It includes Pop Chips, natural popcorn, Fiber One bars, roasted unsalted almonds, apples and peanut butter, and english muffins with cheese. Just in case you were wondering.

[Whitney's site via Twitter]

(Photo: WENN.com)

Post from: Crushable

Dude Diary Kristoffer Polaha

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

You may recognize him from Mad Men or any number of short-lived TV shows, but with the promising popularity of CW’s Life Unexpected, it looks like Kristoffer Polaha may have finally found a role that will take full advantage of his comedic timing and good looks (think Penn Badgley in 10 years).

Kris has put in his time as a TV actor, starring in a number of series the never got off the ground, including North Shore, Valentine and Miss Guided, where he first caught our eye as Judy Greer’s endearingly simpleminded love interest. He’s also had guest roles on an endless list of shows, from Angel and Roswell to CSI: Miami, Better Off Ted and, most recently, a 4-episode stint on Mad Men. He’s even played JFK in a TBS biopic — as if we needed another example of his classic handsomeness.

But it’s Life Unexpected, in which he plays layabout Nate “Baze” Bazile, who suddenly learns he has a teenage daughter (Britt Robertson) with a high school flame, that has finally given Kris a steady, and promising, gig. And did we mention that the 33-year-old cutie steals every scene he’s in? Baze may be lazy but we’re crazy about him in the same ways we were crazy about that guy in the low-slung jeans and baseball cap we knew in college who came late to every class — if he made it at all. We completely understand why radio host Cate (played by Shiri Appleby) slept with the guy in high school, back when he was a promising young football star, back before his complete lack of practical skills and motivation overtook his actual brains and natural charisma. But now that daughter Lux is back in his life, Baze is trying to act responsibly, so we get why Cate will probably end up with him all these years later, despite her current relationship and determination to hate him.

In real life, Kris is a married father of two. He went to college at NYU’s Tisch School of the Arts, where — his CW bio boasts — “he received rave reviews in the New York Times for his role as John Brown in Eugene O’Neill’s Bread and Butter.” He started his TV career in 2001, and has been working steadily since.

But Kris’ track record as the star of a series of TV flops may come back to haunt him with Life Unexpected. The mid-season replacement, which is up against American Idol on Wednesday nights at 8 p.m. drew just over 1 million viewers last week, but CW prez Dawn Ostroff has already admitted that it has a good shot at getting renewed for next season. Can Life Unexpected finally break Kris’ bad luck streak? Either way, we’ll be tuning in.

Post from: Crushable

Emily Blunt Talks Uncomfortable Costumes

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

The costumes for The Young Victoria may have been nominated for an Oscar, but that doesn’t make these period costume corsets any more comfortable. Emily Blunt told People StyleWatch, “It was hell.” That’s just one downside of being a movie star. [People StyleWatch]

Post from: Crushable

Crushable Questionnaire Josh Lieb

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Josh Lieb is the author of the young adult novel I Am a Genius of Unspeakable Evil and I Want to be Your Class President and executive producer of The Daily Show.

1. What’s your back story?

I was a sort of jackassy kid from South Carolina who went into TV and movie and book writing. Now I’m nice.

2. Everyone has a “thing.” What’s yours?

I guess writing is my “thing,” but I don’t like saying that because it sounds so adorable. I don’t like a lot of people who say writing is their “thing,” but I’m not really good at anything else.

3. Everyone has a karaoke song. Name yours (and don’t be shy).

“Solitary Man,” by Neil Diamond. I used to be good and bitter at it before I got married.

4. Who are your biggest influences?

Daniel Pinkwater, Harvey Kurtzman, Redd Foxx.

5. What do you most dislike?

What do I most dislike? Boy, that’s a good question. There’s a lot of things I don’t like. People who say writing is their “thing,” mostly. Bugs in my food. Cruel people.

6. Whose job would you like to steal?

If I was going to steal a job, it would be more about hurting the person whose job I stole. So it would have to be someone I hate. I would steal Osama bin Laden’s job and then I would shut down Al Qaeda. That would drive him nuts.

7. What was your best date?

My first date with my wife. We went to a French restaurant and then we partied with Scott Baio.

8. What was your worst?

I had a lot of dates that ended with yelling and fighting, so one of those.

9. When I wake up in the middle of the night its because I’ve had a nightmare that ___.

I’m usually yelling at people for doing something stupid.

10. I feel best when I’m wearing __.

Something silk with my shirt way open and a big gold watch so I feel like a Greek shipping tycoon.

11. Please settle the debate: New York or LA?

I live in New York now but I like LA a lot. LA because it is warmer and you can have a backyard and the burritos are better. You can always visit New York.

12. What’s on your playlist at this very moment?

Godspeed You! Black Emperor

13. What are you watching on TV?

I mostly just watch old horror movies on DVD. Glee looks funny so maybe I’ll rent that.

14. If you alone held the power to pick the Oscar for Best Picture, would you give it to Avatar or The Hurt Locker?

I haven’t seen them yet. I would give it to nobody just to burn them. Does there have to be a Best Picture? What if everything sucks?

15. Given the chance, would you rather hang out with George Clooney or Robert Downey Jr.?

What the hell kind of question is that? They seem pretty similar to me. The question should be “George Clooney or Ben Stein” or something. In that case, I would pick George Clooney.

16. If you were a character on any movie or TV show, past or present, who would you be?

McGarett from Hawaii 5-0 because he dressed really cool and lived in Hawaii.

17. What is your drug of choice?

Again, that is a crazy question. What am I supposed to say? PCP? Is this a trick? I don’t really have a drug of choice, but if you press me I will say PCP. Done.

18. What’s the last thing you think about before falling asleep at night?

I try to think about whatever I’m reading, because it helps me drift off. If I think about what I’m writing I never fall asleep.

Post from: Crushable

Street Style Columbia Vs NYU

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

This past snowy weekend in Manhattan we traveled uptown to Columbia and downtown to NYU to snap shots of stylish students in winter garb. Also, we wanted to settle a collegiate dispute going on in our heads: Which campus wore it best?

Post from: Crushable

Leno?s Back Tonight But At What Cost?

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

The blogosphere is buzzing about Jay Leno’s return to late night, and Crushable has some insight into controversy swirling around his (not so) triumphant return and some advice for NBC.

After the vicious back and forth that was the Conan O’Brien/Jay Leno Tonight Show saga, Jay is returning to his hosting gig at 11:35 p.m. tonight. NBC is standing by its decision to bring the once-Number One late-night host back to his old spot, but after the way the network treated Conan, we’re not so sure viewers will follow. Conan fans, for one, are pissed. And Conan’s fans are young and cool, the kind of viewers who are too cool to watch late-night TV (unless its hosted by Jon Stewart or Stephen Colbert), which is probably the reason Conan’s ratings suffered so much up until those final weeks. But they’re also the kind of viewers advertisers love. In choosing Jay over Conan, NBC is aging itself, and the network doesn’t seem to care.

Following Conan’s own advice, we’re trying not to be cynical about the whole mess. Instead, let’s look at it practically. Jay has some image rebuilding to do, and this teaser, isn’t winning him any friends from Team CoCo. Not surprisingly, Jay has pulled out all the heavy-hitting guest spots, filling the coming week with Olympic athletes, Sarah Palin and Jersey Shore cast members, which are certainly an attempt to draw younger viewers. But will they bite?

A lot of people are avoiding the Conan angle of this story and focusing on that other late night host: David Letterman. The CBS late night host claimed the number one ratings spot after Jay decamped to 10 p.m., and he had been swiftly beating Conan ever since. So although NBC used to be able to charge more per 30-second ad spot during Jay’s show than CBS could for Letterman’s, now they’re reportedly even. Many are predicting Letterman’s chances of staying on top are slim.

In terms of making a comeback, Hollywood blog The Wrap called Jay “bruised and battered. “We’re not so sure viewers will hold a grudge against Leno,” writer Josef Adalian said. “But that doesn’t mean it’s a straight line back to No. 1 for the Chin.” The Los Angeles Times pointed out that although Jay will probably win back his former audience, the future of the franchise is still unknown. When Jay does decide to actually retire and leave the show altogether, who will be the heir to his late night throne? With Conan out of the way who does that leave…Jimmy Fallon?

We say Jay should focus more on tonight and the coming weeks — working to rebuild his audience and attracting back Conan’s loyal following — and let NBC worry about the future of the show post-Leno. Keeping that in mind, The Vulture offers some ideas for jokes Jay could use to open tonight’s show.

(Photo via NBC)

Post from: Crushable

Your Thoughts On Losing A Best Friend

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Commenter “mjness13″ sent us this response in to our post on best-friend breakups:

My sophomore year in high school I had a falling out with my best friend since the 4th grade. We did everything together, and our parents would always let us go somewhere if the other one went too. Suddenly in the 10th grade, she stopped talking to me and started hanging out with people I did not like. That started a string of friends she would have, then dump. They all came to me asking why she had stopped talking to them, but I could never answer, being she did the same thing to me. I kept trying to confront her about it, and finally she told me she was scared to let people get too close to her, so she was pushing everyone away. To this day (seniors in college), we are still close friends and she has told me that I am the greatest friend she has ever had, because no matter how many times she pushed, I never budged. And that’s all she ever wanted.

Her story reminds us of certain friends we’ve lost and found again — girls who dumped us for other friends, only to repeat the pattern of friend-dumping over and over again until they realized the error of this toxic behavior (not to get all After School Special on you).

Which begs the question: Have you ever been dumped by a friend? If they wanted to get “back together,” would you say take them back — or say, hell no?

Post from: Crushable

Quote Of The Day Russian ?Jersey Shore?

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Elina Miller, co-creator of the Russian-themed Jersey Shore spin-off Brighton Beach, describing her creation in the New York Post:

“There will be plenty of vodka, techno music and guys wearing Adidas pants, leather jackets and gold chains, and driving souped-up cars.”

Post from: Crushable

Housewife Kim Zolciak Now A Lesbian

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

We’re been following this story since this blind item put the idea in our heads that Real Housewives of Atlanta’s Kim Zolciak could have finally ditched Big Poppa — for a lady. Now US Weekly is confirming the story with a report on its Web site: Kim was spotted this weekend at Black’s Annual Gala with her new girlfriend, DJ Tracy Young, who helped remix Kim’s song “Tardy For The Party.” The couple was photographed together back in December, but these rumors about their relationship only started surfacing in the past few weeks. A source tells the magazine Kim is planning to come out during the upcoming season of Housewives.

Bravo told us they had no comment.

Do you think this relationship is for real? Are you looking forward to watching the dramz unfold on the next season of Real Housewives of Atlanta?

(Photo by Dario Cantatore/Getty Images)

Post from: Crushable

The Most Famous Hand Models Ever

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

My college roommate was a hand model, and her hands were so smooth and lovely, the Chicago-based agency was not above driving three hours down to my school in central Illinois for on-location photo shoots. She made $500 per shoot. Not a bad way to make a part-time living.

While my roommate was never sure where the photos were published– who cares, really, when you got $500? — other handmaidens have graced iconic advertisements. To name a few: the Twilight books and that Motorola commercial (the one where Megan Fox had a hand double).

Their hands, names and faces, revealed. (Big Money)

Post from: Crushable

6 Fantastical Theme Park Rides Lost To History [Theme Parks]

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

This week, Michael Jackson's Captain EO staged an unlikely comeback and reopened at Disneyland. Here are six sadly defunct science fiction fairground rides that you can still visit, thanks to the magic of YouTube.

Who needs amusement parks? The lines are interminable, apoplectic ankle-biters are everywhere, and a candy apple costs as much as a fancy microbrew. Take a staycation with io9's YouTube recap of bygone theme park attractions. You're always first in line, you can ride in your underwear, and nobody cares if you're drunk and rowdy!

1.) Back To The Future: The Ride
Where: Universal Studios Hollywood and Florida
Open From: Hollywood: 1991-2007. Florida: 1993-2007.

In BTTF: The Ride, 1955 Biff Tannen absconds with Doc Brown's time machine to the future. Audience members hop inside an eight-passenger DeLorean and chase Biff to 2015, the ice age, and the Cretaceous Period. If you absolutely must ride this, it's still open at Universal Studios Japan in Osaka. Doc Brown will likely be screaming at you in Japanese, but it's the pilgrimage that counts.

2.) Kongfrontation
Where: Universal Studios Florida
Open From: 1990-2002

The classic animatronic King Kong ride, complete with banana-scented halitosis. This staple of Universal Studios closed in 2002, presumably due to the cost of maintaining two 39-foot gorilla robots. If I were an eccentric billionaire, I'd buy both just to keep the help in line. Giant robot gorilla butlers. Fucking A.

(Also, R.I.P. King Kong Encounter.)

3.) ReBoot: The Ride
Where: Segaland Playdium (Mississauga, Ontario), then Circus Circus and The Luxor (Las Vegas)
Open From: 1997-2007

This ReBoot IMAX attraction ran for a solid decade and well after the show had gone off the air. The footage is a little grainy, but you'll get the gist of it.

4. Star Trek: The Experience

Where: The Las Vegas Hilton
Open From: The Klingon Encounter: 1997-2008. Borg Invasion 4-D: 2004-2008.

In The Klingon Encounter, guests time-traveled to the TNG-era Enterprise and were attacked by the raving Klingon Korath, who claimed one of audience members was Jean-Luc Picard's distant antecedent. As far as Klingon plots go, it's total genius. Rather than engage Picard in interstellar combat, it's way less work to slaughter a bunch of confused Vegas tourists.

The highlights of Borg Invasion 4-D were a visit to the Borg Cube and a last-minute rescue from Captain Janeway, during which she opined, "Congratulations. You've defeated the Borg with one thing the Queen can never assimilate: the human spirit." Thanks, Captain Janeway. I'll remember your rosy words when I'm getting my kidneys forcibly replaced with an 8-track player.

Star Trek: The Experience was supposed to re-open at the Las Vegas Neonopolis mall sometime this year, but there's nothing new to report these days.

The Klingon Encounter:

Borg Invasion 4-D:

5.) Stargate SG-3000

From what scant information I found about this Stargate SG-1-themed attraction, it once resided at several Six Flag affiliate parks but is now only open at the Space Center in Bremen, Germany, which - according to German Wikipedia - closed in 2004. Either way, es ist sehr verrückt, ja?

6.) The Ghostbusters Spooktacular Show
Where: Universal Studios Florida
Open From: 1990-1996

They replaced this with a goddamn Twister ride. How's that for looking out for posterity?

Sophisticated Flash Gordon Revamp Keeps Lionman And Hawkmen [Exclusive]

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Breck Eisner, director of The Crazies, is currently heavily involved bringing a new, non-campy, 3-D Flash Gordon film to life. But how do you take the cheese out of Flash Gordon, with all its winged and furry-faced co-stars? Eisner explains.

We've read a lot about your upcoming work, after The Crazies. We heard you might be the director for The Brood, and that you are involved with a new take on the Flash Gordon franchise. Which movie would come first?

Well, The Brood, I was just approached about it. I haven't decided. I'm not sure if its one I want to take on. I love the original, and I'm not sure if it's a movie that I think is ready for a remake. I've been soul-searching and deciding if I want to do that.

Flash Gordon is a project that I've been pursuing for years. I absolutely love that movie, and that strip. It's at Sony, we have the writers on, we've done one draft. I've been brainstorming with them over the past couple months, when I finished post [for The Crazies]. They are busy writing right now, so we will have a script from that in short order, hopefully. It's a big, giant movie. And these things have a lot of different roads to go down before they get green light. Hopefully we'll get there, but it's always a long-shot, but it's one that I feel incredible passion for. In developing it, I've really gone back to the original Alex Raymond strips and pulled information from those.

I read that you really want to strip Flash Gordon of its campiness, what would have to go in order to accomplish this?

Yeah. Well inherently there are two key elements, I think, that removes the camp from the movie. When you re-read Raymond's strips, which were drawn from '32 to about the mid-40s you can't read them as a human being living in today's world. You have to imagine living in a world pre-space travel, and the world of the 30s. It's kind of a more naive view of the Universe. It's a mistake to try and [take] the sensibilities from then, and transplant them into today. So we, what the writers have been saying, is "What would it be like if Raymond was still alive today? If he was writing the strips now? What would he be doing? How much more sophisticated would it be?" And that's one one of our points of view. The other is, it's not just the level of sophistication in the world and in Mongo, and the design and the creatures. It's also the sophistication of character in Flash, and Dale, and Ming. What characters are more realistic and human? What characters have more flaws, and journeys to go on in the course of the movie?

It's such an iconic image, the Flash Gordon figure, just the costume and his boots alone. It's hard to imagine losing the costume or other classic images from the strip. Are those the type of things you think you'll have to do away with?

No, I think it's all a careful balance. I can tell you there will be Hawkmen, there will be Lionman, [and] Ming will be in the movie. In a version that is going to take place on Mongo. I love the source material, so lots of it is going to be in it. I'm not rediscovering, I'm not recreating a take on his original material. There are elements that will be in it, and there will certainly be elements that change. And unique takes on it that might not have been in reflected on before.

So were you a fan of the TV series?

No. Not at all, [ughhh]. I thought the TV series was not good. I think it did a lot of damage to the brand. To do Flash Gordon right — one of the reasons you can't is because of budget. I don't typically ever equate budget [with] a level of sophistication, or success in a project. Certainly, if you have all the money in the world, it doesn't mean you're going to have a good movie. But in a big movie like Flash Gordon, that takes place on another world, if you don't have the budget to do it right or the technology to do it right, it's going to inherently come out campy, whether you want it to or not. It's the only way that you can put that through to portray another planet. My take on this is to not do it, unless we have the right budget and can do it the right way.

But until then see Breck Eisner's work in The Crazies, this Friday.

The Leidenfrost Effect Nature’s Hovercraft [Madscience]

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

You may not realize it, but liquids can glide on cushions of vapor. It's called the Leidenfrost Effect, and it's made some pretty awesome superpowers possible - as well as some unfortunate accidents.

Back in the nineteenth century, Sir William Fairbairn gave a controversial lecture on steam boilers, the engines that drove mechanical devices at that time. He argued that super-hot boilers for heating steam were all well and good, but lowering the temperature of the boiler might be the way to get maximum steam. No doubt Sir William had to pause after that statement, unable to be heard over the mass dropping of monocles, rustling of petticoats, and un-capping of smelling-salts bottles.

How, oh how, his audience wondered, would reducing the temperature of a boiler increase the amount of steam produced?

The answer lies in the Leidenfrost Effect, something most people have observed without knowing it. If you were to sprinkle a few drops of water on a warm frying pan, the drops would probably just hiss at you sullenly. Fair enough. You just dropped them on a hot frying pan, after all. But as the pan continues to heat, the water will hiss and sputter more violently, and will also evaporate more quickly.

Until the pan hit the Leidenfrost Point. At that point, drops you splattered in the pan wouldn't just lie there. They would roll or skitter across the pan in beads, probably trying to enact vengeance upon you. And vengeance they might get, since the Leidenfrost Effect actually allows a drop of water more time on a hot pan than it would otherwise have. Why? The water isn't actually rolling across the surface of the pan. It's rolling on a thin cloud of water vapor between it and the metal.

When the very edge of the liquid hits the hot surface of the frying pan, it turns into vapor so quickly and energetically, that it actually manages to support the rest of the droplet, kind of like the hands of a thousand drunken concert-goers support a crowd-surfer. Exactly like that, in fact, since the process is unreliable and short-lived. The vapor escapes around the edges of the droplet, letting more and more of the droplet down onto the pan until nothing is left but a dampish feel to the air. For the few seconds that the droplet is aloft, though, it is protected on an insulated cushion of water vapor, and kept relatively cool, hovering above the skillet.

Astute followers of physics will be thinking, "That's all well and good, but how can this allow me to get away with something stupid that, by all rights, should hurt like hell?"

Glad you asked!

The most famous example of the Leidenfrost Effect was on an episode of Mythbusters, in which people dipped their hands first into water, then into molten lead, and lo, they were not burned. This example is like the our frying pan and droplet of water, only instead of sandwiching the thin water-vapor cloud between a frying pan and a droplet of water, you put it between a vat of molten lead and your entire hand. (If it's not your dominant hand, the other physicists will call you a sissy.)

Another test of the Leidenfrost Effect shows how it works across a range of temperatures and substances. Liquid nitrogen froze the second Terminator, Wesley Snipes in Demolition Man, and was once used by Jason to kill someone. Despite the fact that none of those deaths were even remotely possible in real life, since it takes liquid nitrogen quite some time to freeze even small sections of tissue, nitrogen remains the most badass of liquids. It only has one mortal enemy: Room temperature. A sixty-eight degree, climate-controlled room is more than enough to evaporate liquid nitrogen. Human body temperature is liquid nitrogen's hot skillet. The internet is full of videos showing people pouring liquid nitrogen over their hands, but it's possible to go them one better. Because of the Leidenfrost Effect, it is possible to spit liquid nitrogen.

Carefully pouring a cup of liquid nitrogen into your mouth will cause the liquid nitrogen that hits your skin to turn to vapor, protecting your mouth from the intense cold and allowing you to spit out a long stream of liquid nitrogen that should freeze an evil-doer's hand when they reach for their gun - or take the temperature of the wires of a bomb to absolute zero, thereby defusing it. Actually all that will happen is the nitrogen will turn to steam as it makes contact with the air, but any of the above things would work if you were in a movie with a fake-blood budget.

Perhaps you desire something a little flashier in your science. For that, I give you this gentleman, who uses the Leidenfrost Effect to break flaming boards.

Consider, for a moment, why I listed that gentleman last. (Hint: Consider the moment marked 1:23, as he tried, with admirable calm, to put out the fire on his own wrist.)

For one thing, I'm not sure the last one was the Leidenfrost Effect as much as it was a guy's willingness to hurt himself on camera. For another, as we have learned from Jurassic Park, not all things that can be done, should be done. Particularly not while drunk or unprepared. Leaving alone what might happen if you accidentally swallowed or inhaled the liquid nitrogen, all of these stunts can hurt you.

Search for ‘Leidenfrost Effect' online and you will first find that these examples are shown many times. If you bother to look at any of the text that accompanies the examples, you will see the words ‘very difficult to calculate' used extremely frequently. Depending on the purity level of the substance, the texture of the surfaces, the amount of liquid, and many other factors, the Leidenfrost Point can playfully jump from one temperature to another. Lead that is too cool to cause the Leidenfrost Effect in one case, will be too hot for the Leidenfrost Effect in another. Yes, the Leidenfrost Point is Lucy in the Peanuts comic strip of life. It will playfully hold the ball for you, assuring you that this time it can be trusted, only to whisk it away and leave you flat on your back with your arms on fire. So please, enjoy the physics, and leave the boiling to the professionals and the people with YouTube accounts.

quotTron Legacyquot Secret Screening An Awesome 15 Seconds [Sneak Peek]

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

We checked out the Tron: Legacy "secret screening" today in Manhattan, along with about 100 other die-hard fans. Here's what we discovered.

The event was part of a viral marketing scheme for the film, which comes out in December. Fans had to sign up and create a profile on the site flynnlives.com and then request tickets at 4pm Friday to get the latest on Tron: Legacy. So all of us had put some effort into this. A motley crowd of mostly die-hard Tron fans was conducted through a gauntlet of security and received "Flynn Lives" t-shirts and 3D glasses. We waited in the IMAX movie theater for about ten minutes while excited discussions ranged all things Tron.

A hundred or so people were in attendance, with a median age of 30 but outlying teenagers and seniors. At one point, a man announced, "Someone flew in from Toronto just for this!" and a ski-hatted Canadian raised his hand proudly. This prompted a shout-out of "Florida guy right here!" which was followed up by a rather weak "there's a guy here from the Alderaan system" that fell flat amongst the fans. "Did he make it in 12 parsecs or less?" someone finally obliged, but we were not here for Star Wars.

1982's virtual reality hacker/video game cult classic movie Tron, starring grand high cult pooh-bah Jeff Bridges, retains enough of an enthusiastic following that a sequel 22 years later motivates its fans to travel to a snowy New York City for footage. There hadn't been many clues about what we'd actually be shown.

At last, the lights darkened, the studio logo popped up in 3D, and this is what we saw:

Kevin Flynn's now grown-up son, Sam (Eragon's Garrett Hedlund) misses his heroic hacker dad. He's talking to Tron's old computer programming pal Alan Bradley (Bruce Boxleitner), who tells Sam that his father was doing work of importance to "science - medicine - religion" and that he suspects Flynn could still somehow be around. This prompts Sam to approach the dusty, abandoned Flynn's Arcade, with its covered-up consoles, to find the Tron machine and the office behind the wall.

The quick cut-scenes complete with 3D effects that we were shown of Sam in the virtual world are very cool, if a bit jarring. We see Sam and other players popping out of the screen in aggressive gladiatorial gaming. We see an epic virtual city, an attractive, white-haired lady, and a man inexplicably playing a futuristic guitar.

Finally, we see a figure in the beloved Tron glow-suit, the screen darkens and a hint of the Bridges beard appears: "Dad," Sam's voice says. "Sam," says the dude. "Long time," Sam says. "You have no idea," says Kevin Flynn. Does Flynn really live or am I living a lie in my new t-shirt?

The screen flashes to Tron: Legacy, and then comes back to give us the roaring hint of a 3D virtual reality motorcycle romp. Then the lights came up, and we were being ushered out of the theater.

The trailer could not have been more than a couple of minutes, a pre-movie standard. The crowd went a bit indignant: "Show it again!" several shouted. People had come from Canada for this!

While people seemed enthusiastic, that was tempered by a feeling that they hadn't seen enough and what was shown wasn't new. "The best fifteen seconds of my life," a guy only half-sarcastically declared as we shuffled out, summing up the experience for most. Others seemed less persuaded. A group I talked to weren't die-hards and had been curious about the screening; one of them had seen fifteen minutes at a Con was annoyed at the whole production.

His friend said that some of the 3D shots felt slightly off, and that the trailer made it seem like "you already know what happens." (It's true that anyone who's seen genre/action movies or any movies could probably put together Tron: Legacy's plot arc, but we're in it for the Bridges.) He went on to wonder if the computer-generated vector look from the first film would really translate in 3D. And the scene of the guy with the guitar moves: "What was up with that?"

Their friend was more optimistic about the whole thing: "I love a movie with daddy issues," he said dryly.

Downstairs, I talked to two fans, Tehnakki and Waterborn, who had come from Boston for the screening. It seemed fitting with the theme of the day that they went by their online handles. Tehnakki had on a great Flynn's Arcade shirt and had enjoyed the trailer, but was somewhat disappointed. None of the footage had been new to them, they said, and felt recycled and repackaged from past Con presentations. Still, were they excited for the new movie? Incredibly so — they had stopped to take pictures by the poster in the lobby. Everyone left talking about Trons old and new amidst the grumblings that we hadn't seen more of the film, which was what the studio wanted from us in the first place. Two decades in, Tron and its offspring's virtual world remains a cyberdream.

quotThe Craziesquot Reinvents Military Horror For The 21st Century [Movie Review]

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

On paper, The Crazies sounds like a B-grade cliche: Bioweapons-made zombies terrorize small town. But the movie defies expectations. The Crazies is a scary, smart thriller that tweaks its tropes and offers a non-preachy fable about the military's dark side.

When seemingly unmotivated acts of violence break out in a tiny Iowa town, the sheriff begins investigating connections between them. Soon enough, he discovers that a plane has crashed in the river that supplies the town's water, and realizes that there's more going on here than drunken rages. Moving at a pleasingly fast clip, the film catapults you forward into a rage zombie scenario that quickly morphs into a military lockdown situation with everybody being herded into a quarantine scarier than the disease itself. Turns out the crashed plane was full of "trixie," a bioweapon designed to take out targets by amping them up with homicidal madness before they die.

David, the sheriff (Timothy Olyphant), is separated from his pregnant wife Judy during the quarantine, so he and his trusty deputy Russell slip away from some military evacuation buses and head back into town to rescue her - and find out what the hell is going on. There is a lot of serious carnage, with redneck hunter crazies doing target practice on the remaining townspeople and piling them in a truck to "dress them out" later. These people aren't zombies - they're just your friends and neighbors gone bugfuck insane. With guns and threshers and creepy smiles.

As David, Judy, and Russell dodge maniacs and soldiers, it becomes clear that the military is just as crazy as the crazies themselves. They slaughter dozens of people and light them on fire; they shoot on sight; they kill a frightened family. And yet in a deft scene where David captures one of the soldiers and rips his gas mask off, we realize that the evil here is not the soldiers themselves. The young guy under the mask is as frightened as the townspeople are, and knows even less than they do. "I'm following orders," he says, nearly weeping. "I'll let you go. I didn't sign up to kill people like this." And then, as good as his word, he does let our heroes slip away without calling in the firing squads. What we're made to understand in this moment is that the military as an institution embodies madness and horror, and its soldiers are victims too.

Nothing drives this home more than a repeated conceit where we return to the point-of-view of surveillance satellites and outposts around the town. Suddenly, we'll be pulled back from the action and into what looks like a version of Google satellite view, with sparse, digital orders to "contain target." There are a million movies that do this, but it's a very effective device in The Crazies, where for the most part the military is represented by machines and people in so much protective face gear that they look like cyborgs. This is the moral alarm at the heart of The Crazies: A depersonalized, soulless military that cares only about executing its "contain target" orders and never looks its civilian victims in the face.

Those familiar with George A. Romero's original early-1970s flick The Crazies will see homages to the original all over the place in director Breck Eisner's version of the film. But he's updated the story brilliantly, making it relevant to current terrors. For example, the original film's protagonists were Vietnam vets, and many of the death orgy scenes were intentionally staged to be reminiscent of images from Vietnam. In Eisner's The Crazies, we see the face of today's semi-robotic, high tech military instead - a military that uses smart nukes rather than tear gas.

Plus, in a very interesting move, Eisner focused his film entirely on the fleeing townspeople - David, Judy, and Russell. This allows the action to get a lot scarier and more intense, and it heightens our sense of the military as a machine-controlled operation. Gone are the original film's scientist struggling to administer an antidote, and gone are practically any glimpses of the military's perspective on the situation (other than what we see relayed as commands via the surveillance satellite). This is a much bleaker version of The Crazies in many ways, especially when we get to the seriously disturbing ending.

The Crazies is a perfect example of genre film done right. It's a violent, weird science flick that entertains you with a punch to the gut and leaves you thinking afterward.

The Real Problem With Midichlorians [Rant]

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Lately, when people ask Lost's producers if they're going to answer our questions, they bring up Star Wars' midichlorians, as proof that some things are better not explained. But like so many people, they're missing the real reason midichlorians sucked.

Damon Lindelof told E! Online a while back:

There are certain questions about the show that I'm very befuddled by like, 'What is the Island?' or 'What do the numbers mean?' We're going to be explaining a little more about the numbers, maybe significantly more about the numbers, but what do you mean by 'What do the numbers mean?' What is a potential answer to that question? I feel like you have to be very careful about entering into Midi-Chlorian territory. I grew up on Star Wars; I've seen the Star Wars movies hundreds of times; I can recite them chapter and verse, and never once did anyone ever say to me or did it occur to me to say, 'What is the Force, exactly? Can you explain that for me, better than Alec Guinness does?' I understand, 'When are we going to find out about Libby?' That's a very finite question. 'Who is Jacob?' OK, yes, we've been talking to this guy named Jacob, so those questions then should have answers, but 'What is the Island?' That starts to get into 'What is the Force?' It is a place. I can't explain to you why it moves through space-time-it just does. You have to accept the fact that it does.

Carlton Cuse similarly told the Chicago Tribune's Maureen Ryan:

I mean, mystery exists in life and we kind of always go back to the midi-chlorians example [in the 'Star Wars' prequel films]. Your understanding the Force was not aided by knowing that there were little particles swimming around in the bloodstreams of Jedi.

This is part of a wide-spread problem with midichlorians — I would say a galaxy-wide misconception, in fact. People understand that midichlorians were a terrible idea, but they don't understand why they were a terrible idea. And this misunderstanding allows storytellers to get away with saying they won't explain stuff which they really should explain.

(And for the record, I still have faith that Lost will answer the questions that really need to be answered — including why the heck this island is so important, and why the battle over the island's future isn't just a random real-estate dispute, no different than your uncles fighting over your grandma's Florida beach condo. This isn't especially a slam against Lost — just trying to clear up a disturbance in, you know, the Force. And stuff.)

So let's break this down once and for all.

1. We already had an explanation for the Force.

Check out what Obi-Wan Kenobi says in the original Star Wars:

Well, the Force is what gives a Jedi his power. It's an energy field created by all living things. It surrounds us and penetrates us. It binds the galaxy together.... A Jedi can feel the force flowing through him.

That's actually a pretty clear-cut explanation, although it doesn't go into particle physics or anything. But compared to a lot of science-fiction explanations, it's refreshingly free of technobabble, and it's fairly specific: The Force is an "energy field created by all living beings." Possibly mystical and soul-related, as Han suggests, or possibly just some kind of life-energy. And certain people have an in-born ability to sense and interface with this life-energy.

What's so hard to understand about that?

But midichlorians actually contradict this explanation. All of a sudden, instead of there being an energy field that "binds the galaxy together," there are little microscopic life forms inside of the Jedi, allowing them to... do what? What do the microscopic entities have to do with the galaxy-wide life force? Are they like symbiotes that allow you to connect to the energy field? If the Force is in every living thing, then why do only some people have midichlorians? Does the Dark Side of the Force have different-flavored midichlorians than the light side?

What was a fairly clear-cut explanation suddenly becomes incredibly muddled.

It's like the sort of thing that happens to superheroes all the time. Spider-Man used to have a clear-cut (if silly) explanation for his powers: he was bitten by a radioactive spider. But then, at some point, the writers of his comic decided there needed to be a "Spider totem" involved, and a spider queen, and Anansi knows what else. Flash suddenly had to have the "Speed Force" bolted on top of his previously simple origin, and Green Lantern had to have a whole emotional spectrum, with different colored rings for different emotions. And so on. It's part of the nature of retcons: What was once simple becomes baroque.

Instead of building on the explanation we already had, Phantom Menace demolished it to put up an ugly new monstrosity.

2. If someone had told you Episode I explains more about the Force and how it works, you'd have been stoked.

Seriously. Imagine if, back in 1998, someone had told you the new movie includes the Jedi finding young Anakin and discovering his huge potential Force powers — including the means by which they determine that the Force is moving strongly in this one. You'd have thought, "Ooh, Lucas is going to open up the mysteries of the Jedi. There'll be cool Yoda-esque koans and riddles and spiritual disciplines, and possibly more blindfolds."

And you'd have been right — in theory, more understanding of the Force would have been a good thing. It's one of the coolest things about Star Wars. If you wanted to go back in time and take all of the discussion of the Force out of Empire Strikes Back, I would have to go back in time and stop you, because that stuff all rules. So yeah, more of that type of exploration of the Force would have been terrific.

It's not that midichlorians were an explanation for something which should have been mysterious — it's more that they were a dumb, ridiculous technobabble concoction. And they're not an explanation you can build on, which is even worse. You can build a whole architecture on top of "an energy field that connects all living beings," and the original trilogy did, quite well. But you can't build on top of "microscopic critters in the blood."

It's the difference between explanation (Empire Strikes Back) and hand-waving (Phantom Menace). What the Force is, and how it works, is something that we're better off being shown, through examples like Yoda's Taoist teachings. Telling us how the Force works, by tossing around silly jargon, isn't really an explanation — it's just Lucas flailing around with a glue-gun, sticking things together randomly.

So your take-away point here is that it's not that explanations are bad — ham-handed, idiotic explanations that make things less cool are bad.

3. Star Wars never made "What is the Force?" into a central mystery.

There's a reason that Star Wars explains what the Force is the very first time we hear about its existence: It's part of the set-up. We're not supposed to sit around wondering what the Force is, except to the extent that we see Luke learning how to use it. Luke's lessons in the Force are our way in to understanding its subtleties — but the over-arching question of what the Force is? We know that from square one.

Likewise, we're not really supposed to wonder how the Enterprise flies on Star Trek, or how the TARDIS dematerializes on Doctor Who, or how the ships can "jump" on Battlestar Galactica. Those things are not set up as huge mysteries that the characters are trying to get to the bottom of. We don't get tossed clues about the nature of the Enterprise's engines. The mystery of the Enterprise's engines and how they work does not deepen over time. Scotty does not say "I'm doin' the best I can, Cap'n, but I canna understand what these Dilithium crystals have to do with anti-matter in the first place!" Every now and then, these shows will throw fans a bone, by mentioning some new details of how these things work. But we're not supposed to think of these things as central mysteries to be solved.

The Force is the same way.

Lost's island, though, is mysterious from the moment our castaways crash on it, and its mysteries deepen in every episode. Even now, I constantly see promos for Lost reruns which show Charlie asking where the hell this place is. The show has gone out of its way to play up the mystery of what the island is, and who Jacob is, and how the Man In Black got there, and so on. It is the central mystery of the show, and one I still have great confidence will be resolved, in spite of Cuse and Lindelof's statements trying to lower our expectations.

Why would Cuse and Lindelof be trying to lower our expectations anyway? Could it be because they saw another show with a cult following, which promised "all will be revealed," over and over again, and then turned out to have a somewhat... idiosyncratic definition of the word "all"? But let's not reopen old wounds.

The point is, there's a difference between your set-up and your big mysteries. We don't expect Lost to explain how the plane that crashed on the island was able to fly in the first place — Even though I don't fully comprehend all the principles of aerodynamics that go into keeping a jet plane in the air, I know they work because I've flown in them. I'm not even looking for a detailed explanation of, say, how the island is able to move through time and space. We've seen it work, so we know it works, and we've gotten enough details about unique magnetic forces to let us fill in the blanks.

But when you set up something as a central mystery and you make people start talking about it in grandiose terms (i.e., referring to the island as more important than, say, Tuvalu) then you owe us an explanation, all right. It doesn't have to be a series of diagrams or schematics, or go into ridiculous detail. It shouldn't contradict what we've already learned. And it would be nice if it had some element of showing along with the telling. But one way or another, if you make a big deal out of asking a question, then you have to provide an answer. That's just basic storytelling.

So let's stop using midichlorians as shorthand for "explaining stuff which should remain a mystery." Midichlorians are more like "a clumsy retcon that screws up an explanation we already had."

Creep Into The Strange Imaginings of Ivica Stevanovic [Art Show]

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Ivica Stevanovic is an artist from Serbia. All I can say is that he's a mad genius of the surreal....and I like it. I like it a lot. In this gallery, we'll tour his unusual world.

In addition to his amazing images in graphic novels, he has also worked on numerous chiildren's books as well as covers for various publishers. I first came across his amazing images while working on the Steampunk Reloaded anthology with my husband, Jeff VanderMeer. I am lucky enough to be married to a man who shares my artistic aesthetic. Jeff is the one who introduced me to Ivica's work.

How can you look at this and not feel something creeping up your back? This is one of several pieces from a project called Graphocalypse.

Makes Mickey Mouse ears look sinister, doesn't it?

This is Babylon City. Stevanovic uses images from famous paintings and makes them his own. A similar technique used by Scott Eagle who I profiled over the holidays.

In My Mouth - from the graphic novel Kindly Corpses:

Cross Section - also from Kindly Corpses:

Wisdom Tree, from Graphocalypse:

Signs in the Sky - I want to do a book with this as the cover. Wouldn't you buy it?

Days of the Beast - another from Graphocalypse. It reminds me of Alice in Wonderland... and other stuff. A bit of Frida Kahlo in there, too. Creepy because I feel like I know that guy with the crooked teeth (I think I went to high school with him...)

Another from the graphic novel Kindly Corpses - My Heart:

Also from Kindly Corpses - don't you just want this book? I want to buy every single book with Ivica's art regardless of what language it is in.

Book Cover for Demon Slike - gotta love a fish with arms:

From a graphic novel - L'Anatomie du Ciel – Anatomy of the Sky:

The Hobbit - ok, yes I know....Another version of The Hobbit? But don't you just love his take on it? Makes you look at Bilbo Baggins in a totally different light.

When Monkeys Ruled Comic Books! [Gallery]

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

For mid-20th century DC Comics, there was one surefire way to raise sales: Stick an ape on the cover and make readers ask why. And it still works! Go on - pretend you don't want to read these stories.

The origin of the ape meme was very down to Earth, according to DC artist Sheldon Moldoff, who explained it to the Comics Journal:

It was a question of trying to find something that sold, and if one issue came out and it happened to sell, then immediately they would follow that type of story. Now, it didn't neccessarily follow through that they were going to sell. Now, I know Jack Schiff, when he was the editor of Batman, he followed sales very well. When he found that a gorilla on covers sold, then you could be damn sure that in an issue or two you're going to have another gorilla story.

We can understand the logic of wanting more gorilla stories, but there's no denying that some kind of weird genius came into play when deciding that these were the kinds of gorilla stories that readers wanted:

The trend didn't even die out as the audience started to grow up. Sure, ape appearances became fewer and far between, but before too long, DC's Ape History had become something that the publisher embraced, somewhere between affectionate parody and outright nostalgia:

In fact, there's even a collection of some of the best ape-related superhero stories for those who're curious... But we're waiting on one that'll finally tell us whether John (Gorilla) Doe was finally found innocent or not. Surely that injustice cannot stand?!?

How The New Crazies Is Scarier Than Romeros Original [Exclusive]

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

We talked infectious diseases with The Crazies director Breck Eisner. And learned the great pains he took to make sure George Romero's film was updated correctly. Rule number one: These people aren't zombies, they're alive — and full of rage!

Why did you want to remake George Romero's Crazies?

I was originally approached by [producers] Michael Aguilar and Dean Georgaris, and they had optioned the rights to this movie directly from Romero himself, and they had the first draft by Scott Kosar. The fact that Romero himself had sold the rights, I thought was a major positive factor. I had seen The Crazies as a kid, like 20 some odd years ago, on VHS tape or maybe a Betamax tape. It stuck with me. This concept of the people you love most, and trust most, suddenly turning on you and becoming your worst enemy, it seemed like a very guttural, or gut-wrenching final human fear. It's a fear like when you first start school, and your friends could turn on you for no reason whatsoever. It just seemed like an idea that had relevance today. Yet it was a movie that a lot o people had forgotten about.

Were you nervous taking on a project that was previously Romero's?

For sure, yes. The thing that was most nerve-wracking throughout the whole process was after we were completely finished. I set up a screening for Romero in Toronto and he watched it, and I had to pick up the phone the next day and say, "So what did you think?" That was by far the most nerve-wracking part of the whole experience. Luckily for me, and for him, he really liked it. And had some really positive things to say... I can't remember exactly what he said, but he thought it was a really strong movie, well-directed, obviously different from what he had done. But he was glad to see it because it had been a long time since he made the movie. And he said he thought it was really going to find his audience. Which was interesting for me to hear, that Romero still wanted to have his audience watch this movie.

For people that haven't seen the film, I think a lot of people are going to want to know how it's different from the film, could you explain what you changed for readers who haven't seen the first film?

The original was told in a different point of view. Half of the movie was told from the military's point of view — maybe more than half, actually. And the other half was told from the infected townsfolk's point of view, and the townsfolk trying to escape the infection. When I first approached our new script it still had both points of view. But I really wanted to limit the scale, and tell it just from the point of view of our heroes. By doing the it really focused more on our characters. There was more time to get to know a little bit more about these people. But it was also a way to make the movie more unsettling, more horrific, more frightening, by the fact that the heroes and the audience wasn't really sure what was happening. Everything and everybody was in the dark and they have to figure it out as it goes. The town is literally turned on its side, and the characters don't even know why, they have to figure it out over the course of the movie.

Were there any little elements of nods that you kept in the film from the original?

There's a lot, the basic core concept itself is right from the movie. But there are also a lot of little things in the movie, and I tend not to speak about them, because people discover it as they watch it. But this one is in the trailer: Lynn Lowry was one of the leads in the original. I tracked her down, called her up, and got her in the movie for a cameo. There are also a couple of other winks and nods to the movie, for people who really know the original. Not just people who know of it, but people who are well versed in the film and will recognize a handful of very specific homages in it. But obviously there are many scenes that are directly from the original itself.

This remake is infinitely scarier than the original, what did you do to try and up the anti, what decisions had to be made?

It is scarier, definitely scarier. You have to pick what you're going to do to get to the audience, but the movie has a message, which is inherent in the DNA of Romero's earlier film. It's a message movie. Romero had the benefit, and also kind of a detriment, of a very small budget and total independence. He made a film that was in very strong condemnation of the military in the post-Vieatnam world. I wanted to make sure we kept that message in the film. And it's definitely there. But at the same time, to get as broad of an audience as possible I wanted to update the film, make it scarier, make it more of a thrill ride, give it more action. In doing that we hopefully will reach a broader audience, and the message will reach a broader audience, versus a having a stronger message that reaches a smaller audience.

Plus, I have to say the make-up and FX look great. How did you walk that line of not making a zombie movie, because this is not a zombie movie, but people always think Zombies=Romero.

It's a line that was clearly established by Romero: it's not a zombie movie. And that's the great thing about this movie, it's a Romero movie but not a zombie movie. Any time you think Romero, the default setting is zombies, so [we] had that hill to climb. We really went out of our way to make sure the aesthetic looks of the infected and the performances were not tantamount to being a zombie. Zombies, in theory, have a collective agenda, which is to eat brains or to infect someone else. But they lose their previous persona and are reborn in the undead. In The Crazies the character themselves don't lose their initial agenda. The characters have deep-seated elements to their psyche and their persona, that "trixie," this disease [the name of the disease], unleashes in this rage state. So everybody acts differently when they are under the influence of this disease, in the rage state.

Also in turns of the look itself, when people first turn, you don't actually even see it aesthetically. There's no sign of it initially. But as they get sicker and sicker, the manifestations of the disease take over. Things start to change. Instead of doing decaying skin in grey color, we have red flush skin, inflamed arteries. We imagined that the heart was beating at three times the rate, so the people were all amped up. We tried to make sure that the look of them different.

They are not dead. The number one rule we went with was that these people were alive. They are more alive than you or me. They are going to burn bright and hot, but they are going to burn out fast. And that's the course of this disease. Like the Replicants in Blade Runner, that came to my mind.

The Crazies is in theaters tomorrow.

Ask Paolo Bacigalupi About Windup Girl [Io9 Book Club]

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

For the past few days, we've been discussing Paolo Bacigalupi's novel The Windup Girl in our io9 book club meeting. Now you can ask Paolo about the book! He'll be joining us here in comments tomorrow at 12 PST.

Please reserve the comments section here for specific questions to Paolo - you can continue debating and reviewing and discussing over in the io9 book club thread. He'll join us tomorrow at noon PST and spend about an hour answering questions. Go ahead and post your questions between now and tomorrow noon, and he'll get to as many as he can.

Remember that Paolo is an actual human, so be polite.

Taking a Stroll in LowEarth Orbit The Truth About Spacewalks [Io9 University]

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

When astronauts spacewalk, it looks like they're floating serenely in the vacuum of space. The reality: they're hurtling at 17,220 mph inside bulky pressurized suits. Here's the lowdown on spacewalking, from how it's done to what it costs.

The technical name for a spacewalk is an EVA, or extra-vehicular activity, which would probably make for a great pick-up line next time you meet a hot astronaut. Since Alexei Leonov made the first spacewalk for the Soviet Union in 1965, 191 humans have ventured into space outside the confines of a craft (some of them were only partially outside). This number includes American astronauts who walked on the moon. Most spacewalks occur in orbit around the Earth or the moon, but a few on the Apollo missions were conducted in what NASA refers to as "deep space."

The first American spacewalker was Edward White, during the Gemini 4 mission in 1965, just a few months after Leonov. The photos of White floating in space tethered to his spaceship (bottom photo) virtually defined the 1960s popular image of space exploration. Like White's spacewalk, most EVAs are tethered. Since the tether carries oxygen and water to the astronaut, it allows the suit to be much less bulky. Compare White's suit to the untethered one worn by astronaut Bruce McCandless in 1984. McCandless' suit not only had to include all of his life support systems, but he also had to wear the Manned Maneuvering Unit (MMU), which allowed him to propel himself in various directions using pressurized nitrogen. The MMU was retired and replaced by the smaller SAFER unit, (Simplified Aid for EVA Rescue), proving NASA's ability to push both the technological and acronymical envelopes.

The SAFER unit is used for certain emergency procedures, such as Stephen K. Robinson's EVA to the bottom of shuttle Discovery to remove some filler tiles that might have caused re-entry problems. They're also used for construction jobs in places the tether just won't reach.

In fact, most of the time when an astronaut spacewalks, he or she is putting in a few hours as an orbital construction worker. EVAs have been vital in the construction of the International Space Station, as well as making repairs to the Hubble Telescope and dealing with various mechanical problems that seem to crop up whenever a robotic arm is involved. The picture below comes from a NASA manual, and depicts a bag of tools designed for repairing the Hubble Space Telescope. I'm not sure what the Flash Gordon ray-guns are for.

Of course, NASA and the world's other space agencies don't send people on EVAs on a whim. It's dangerous work (although no one has ever died or been seriously injured on an EVA). Astronauts working on the ISS report an initial period of severe disorientation, as their perspective flips from "hand-stand" to "surfboard" and back repeatedly. The problem is, the abstract shape of the ISS doesn't give their brains any up or down cues to latch onto the way the space shuttle does.

Velocity is a big problem, mainly due to space junk. At over 17,000 mph, any impact is potentially deadly. A stray bolt from Skylab could strike you with more energy than a bullet, and even if it doesn't kill you outright, it could still tear a hole in your suit. Depressurization, loss of oxygen, and other generally irreversible difficulties immediately follow.

There's also radiation to worry about. With no atmosphere or heavy shielding, cosmic rays can build up dangerous rad levels pretty quickly. All EVA astronauts wear special MOSFET badges that continually monitor their radiation levels.

Finally, you could always get a bad case of the bends from working for up to eight hours in a pressurized suit. For some missions, astronauts "camp out" in the airlock, set to a lower air pressure. This flushes nitrogen from the blood and reduces the chances of later experiencing decompression sickness.

If all this hasn't scared you off, you could actually take a spacewalk yourself. Space Adventures, the company that lets insanely rich people take a ride on the ISS, will also let insanely rich people go on a 90-minute EVA adventure. It costs an extra $15 million and requires an extra month of training.

That actually seems like a fairly accurate estimation of the cost of a spacewalk. In 2004, when Russia had to use one of their Orlan suits to make some repairs left unfinished due to malfunctioning NASA gear, they charged NASA 500 hours of spacework, which experts estimated worked out to about $10 million. Since space agencies are not allowed to directly pay each other for work, they exchange work hours as currency. So basically, if NASA owes another country some money, our astronauts end up doing their homework for them.

Incorporating realistic spacewalks into science-fiction shouldn't be too difficult. Keep in mind that the suits are quite hard to move around in — astronauts are very sore after a long shift on an EVA, constantly pushing against the suit. It's one reason that female astronauts have been underrepresented among spacewalkers. From there, just ramp up the danger levels. Make the radiation deadlier, the high-velocity space debris more plentiful (possibly as a result of Kessler Syndrome). Maybe throw in some anaerobic space bacteria that will infect the astronaut if it gets in through a punctured suit. Or just go full Buck Rogers and have a laser battle combined with the weird choreography of a tethered spacewalk.

Why Warehouse 13 Works or Relax Its Just Everything [Guest Blogger]

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Bob Goodman, one of the writers on Warehouse 13, offers some insights into the creative process as this series moves from its first to second season, and shares his theory about why a "storehouse of weirdness" show caught the zeitgeist.

Note: What follows is one writer's opinion, and doesn't represent the thoughts of the staff as a whole, the studio, the network, or anyone else. And spoilers abound. But only about season one, which has already aired. Want more insights? A Twitter Q&A is happening today at 1 PM PST, including Goodman (@b0bg00dman), plus fellow writers Drew Greenberg (@drewzachary) and Deric Hughes (@dblackanese) and actor Allison Scagliotti (@allisonscag).

I'll admit it. At first I wasn't sure about the disco ball.

We were writing the first season of Warehouse 13. The episode was "Duped" (written by Benjamin Raab and Deric A. Hughes), and it's a story in which Pete and Myka (our leads, a pair of Secret Service agents played by Eddie McClintock and Joanne Kelly) are on a mission to hunt down a lucky poker chip. But unbeknownst to the rest of the team, Myka's consciousness has switched places with that of Alice Liddell (Lewis Carroll's real-life inspiration for his lead character in Alice in Wonderland) who, in our historically-revised universe, was really a violently insane girl who previous Warehouse agents trapped in Carroll's famous titular looking glass.

Complicated enough, right? Wait. The cause of this Myka-Alice flip-flop was an "adverse artifact interaction" between Carroll's mirror and the disco ball from Studio 54.

To me, at first, it seemed like an artifact too far. And that was before we got to junior member of the team Claudia (Allison Scagliotti) cobbling together a pile of repurposed artifacts, wires and knobs to create a steampunk-ized, CIA-inspired laser mic, in order to communicate with the trapped Myka inside the mirror.

In other episodes from season one (cherry-picked to further my point, but by no means a statement of preference or "best-of's"), veteran agent and warehouse caretaker Artie (Saul Rubinek) uses Ben Franklin's lightning rod to free Claudia's brother from an interdimensional bubble caused by an obscure 16th-Century cartographer's compass; our heroes employ an early Chinese firework that mesmerizes its viewers, while tracking down a Samurai sword that causes invisibility — deep breath — part of which was given to Woodrow Wilson in the 1920's; and, in our season finale, the team runs into an ear-shattering goblet owned by the Roman emperor Elagabalus, Timothy Leary's hallucination-inducing eyeglasses, and a wearer-morphing thimble owned by Harriet Tubman, all while on their search for a medallion of the phoenix that allows one to survive fire.

What the hell is this show? I mean, sure it's funny, frenetic and action-packed — a mix not only of cultural references but genre conventions and tones, all thrown together in a blender and somehow... working. But this all runs contrary to my deeply-ingrained story sense, which believes in finding clean, clear lines and well-defined motifs.

At first, I admit, that's what I thought. And I was one of the guys writing it.

But now I get it. Just recently, during our early weeks of writing season two, I grokked the show.

There's a difference between writing on the first season of a series and the second. During season one you're busy figuring out what the show is, finding the tone and balance, and probing it around the edges to see what sort of stories you can tell. In season two you have that first season to look back at for reference. The show exists to tell you what works and doesn't, and what it's about. And thanks to that altered point of view, I now have my own theory about what Warehouse 13 is. Why it's meaningful in this moment in history. Why it's a hit; why it speaks to enough viewers to have made it the most popular scripted series ever in Syfy's eighteen-year history:

Warehouse 13 is about the collective, cognitive anxiety we're feeling, caused by the sudden collision between our primitive, analog selves... and digital access to everything.

***

We find ourselves living in a time when we have simultaneous and ready access to all history, culture, knowledge, news, music, TV, movies, stories — ever. Need an image of a twelfth-century trebuchet, or maybe an historically-accurate recipe for how mille-feuille was prepared in Napoleon's time? Click; here you go. When was the last time you were talking with someone about a funny or formative TV moment, that you couldn't pull it up on the web to show them? If you were so inclined, you could carry around every song you've ever heard in your life, in your pocket. And thanks to Facebook, that same random access exists for every friend, relative or co-worker you've ever known. We're all getting to experience Slaughterhouse Five firsthand. Our lives are on shuffle.

And all of this is both good and bad. In the proverbial definition of "crisis," the moment presents both danger and opportunity. We're all in input overload, struggling to stem the tide of messages coming at us by email, cell phone, chats, texts and tweets. The elusive holy grail of nerd pride has become the phrase "inbox zero."

It's all moving too quickly for information to be reliable anymore. Michael Jackson was dead, alive, and dead again many times over on Twitter before any citable sources started talking. My wife and I were away from the news for a day, and missed an entire shared cultural event having something to do with a boy in a balloon... that turned out to be a hoax by the time we got home.

And if you think this is all just ethereal chatter without real-world ramifications, let me dissuade you. As the world gets smaller and the increasing interrelatedness of everything gets too complex for us to wrap our heads around, "adverse interactions" really are increasing. History is collapsing in on itself, and pulling clashing cultures into the resulting black hole with it. I apologize in advance for invoking 9/11, but on that day at the start of the new millennium, a group of people still fighting the Crusades used airplanes to destroy a pair of iconic buildings from the 1970's, killing 3,000 people and shocking the West's financial system... and the way we fight them is by cutting off the opium trade. Sounds as eclectic as that plotline for "Duped," doesn't it?

Which brings me back to the show. Here's what this borderline-insane rant has to do with Warehouse 13:

The warehouse in the series' title is the repository of every mystical artifact from all human history. The storage site of all our cultural touchstones, all our stories, all our myths, in one place. Sound familiar? There's a reason the warehouse is depicted as infinitely large, why we see a new room, a new section, a new feature every week. The warehouse is our moment in time made physical; the internet in hard copy. The reason we can't see the edges is because there aren't any.

For some of us, this bombardment by everything is rightfully stressful. Artie is the older generation, the analog man, who has a lifetime of experience bagging and tagging freaky doo-dads; but lately it's all gotten too big, moving too fast, and he's walking a thin line just this side of overwhelmed, perpetually scrambling at the boundary of his ability to manage it.

And on the other side there's Claudia, the younger generation, who can handle it, who's comfortable with the world being a non-stop, ever-changing cosmic mash-up. Who, to borrow a concept from Douglas Rushkoff's book Playing the Future, is able to just "surf" it. And not surf the way we've come to say it about the internet, meaning something like "browse around" it. But surf the way it was originally meant, meaning ride it, play in it, harness its power and make something new — just as Claudia does in "Duped." While Artie's limits-stretching goal is simply to keep it all bottled up so it doesn't kill us, Claudia is the one who says, "Relax Grandpa, it's just everything."

***

So where is it all going? With this new epiphany about the significance of the series, does the show's path into the future become clear? Thankfully, no. It helps... maybe. One's GPS has to know where one is starting from, before it can plot a course where one is going. And I have recently come up with some of my own new theories about what the final episodes of Warehouse 13 might be.

But first of all, it's not even close to my place to unilaterally say. As I said at the top, everything herein is just one writer's opinion. Sure, I might pitch my ideas, but I'm only one mid-level guy in a room full of talented writers, all of whom discover the series together as we go. (A group of writers, by the way, with whom I'm not only lucky enough to get to discuss such highfalutin ideas as these, but with whom I also laugh so hard daily that my face hurts.) And we, the members of that writing room, answer to a studio and a network; and we all answer to the audience. But just as importantly, grand unifying theories like this are just too lofty to actually let infect the discovery process. This stuff's for lunch-hour conversation, and then leaving outside the door when we're working so we can let the future and our own story instincts drive the show. And hopefully deliver something with life in it, and fun.

So for now I'm satisfied to share my revelation on what the series is — but for the most part, keep my theories about where it's going to myself. Except to say, it's probably going to have something to do with everything.

Bob Goodman can be found on Twitter, at twitter.com/b0bg00dman.

TV This Week The Avatar Awards Edition [What To Watch]

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

What's in store this week? New episodes of Lost, Caprica, Chuck, and the 82nd Academy Awards! Will the Academy crown James Cameron the King of the Cat-Men or blow him a big blue raspberry? Watch and see!

NOTE: In honor of this week's Oscars, I'll be inventing a number of awards to bestow upon this week's programming. I may eschew these awards in the coming weeks, just as I eschewed an obvious Avatar-related "blue balls" joke in this week's headline. Hey, we keep it tactful.

MONDAY 3/1/10
First off, we've got the post-Olympic return of Chuck ("Chuck vs The Fake Name") at 8 PM on NBC:

There's also two new episodes of the anime series Monster (Syfy, 10 and 10:30 PM), but the real gems this evening are the recipients of the first weekly What To Watch WTF Award. This award goes to the National Graphic Channel for airing a triumvirate of weird-ass science shows...

10 PM - The Whale That Exploded ("A scientific investigation into why a 56-ton sperm whale exploded in a street in Taiwan.")
11 PM - Mystery Bear of the Arctic ("A sports hunter faces possible criminal charges after shooting what appears to be a rare grizzly-polar bear hybrid.")
12 PM - Paranatural Mystery Lights

...and to HBO Family for airing Junior at 11:30 PM. Hey, it's technically a science fiction movie.

Talk Circuit: Astrophysicist Neil DeGrasse Tyson on The Daily Show (Comedy Central, 11 PM), Robert Pattinson on Late Night With Jimmy Fallon (NBC, 12:37 AM), Eli Roth on Last Call With Carson Daly (NBC, 1:36 AM)

TUESDAY 3/2/10
New Lost ("Sundown") at 9 PM on ABC. Looks like we'll have a Sayid/Dogen showdown of sorts.

Tuesday also brings the premiere of two science shows:

- NOVA: "Pluto Files" at 8 PM on PBS. "Neil deGrasse Tyson, director of the American Museum of Natural History's Hayden Planetarium, explores people's opinions about Pluto."
- Explorer Episode: Inside the Nuclear Threat at 10 PM on National Geographic. "The threat of terrorists detonating a nuclear bomb."

The oddballs this evening are a double airing of Underworld Evolution (FX, 8 & 10:30 PM), A Boy and His Dog (The Movie Channel Extra, 1:05 AM), and a Primeval marathon (Syfy, 8 AM-4 PM)

Talk Circuit: Robert Pattinson on The Daily Show, Wesley Snipes (!) and Emilie de Ravin on Fallon.

WEDNESDAY 3/3/10
Not a lot this evening, but we do have What To Watch's Futurama Episode Of The Week! It's " Less Than Hero" (Comedy Central, 9 PM), the episode in which Fry and Leela gain superpowers. While perhaps not the most memorable episode, the antics of Bender's heroic alter-ego Superking make it a worthwhile 30 minutes of your life.

There's a new episode of MonsterQuest ("Piranha Invasion," History, 9 PM), Alien (Turner Classic Movies, 10:15 PM), and The Terminator (AMC, 1:30 AM).

THURSDAY 3/4/10
Reruns of The Vampire Diaries ("Unpleasantville, CW, 8 PM) and Supernatural ("Swap Meat," CW, 9 PM), the hokey Red Planet (AMC, 8 PM), Reign of Fucking Fire (Syfy, 6:30 PM), and a Jake 2.0 marathon (Syfy, 8 AM - 4 PM) round out a fairly blah day.

Talk Circuit: Sonya Walger on The Late Late Show With Craig Ferguson (CBS, 12:37 AM),Mia Wasikowska on Fallon.

FRIDAY 3/5/10
New Caprica (" Know Thy Enemy," Syfy 9 PM)!

Also playing are Smallville reruns ("Rabid" & "Roulette," CW, 8 & 9 PM), 12 Monkeys (AMC, 10:30 PM), From Dusk Till Dawn ("C'mon sex machine!" Encore, 11:30 PM), Alien vs. Predator (FX, 10 PM), and Children of Men (USA, 11:30 PM).

The Awesome Movie On A Non-Basic Cable Channel At A Stupid Time Award goes to The Man Who Fell to Earth (Sundance, 12 AM). No!

SATURDAY 3/6/10
There's a new episode of Survivors (BBCA, 9 PM), The Incredibles (ABC Family, 10 PM), and Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within (HBO Family, 11 PM). C'mon, go out and meet some specimens tonight.

SUNDAY 3/7/10
The 82nd Annual Academy Awards (ABC, 8:30 PM)! I've got next month's rent riding on a dark horse upset from Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Squeakuel.

Join me next week on What To Watch as I gloat about my wildly prescient call that Jason Lee would swipe the Best Actor statuette for his portrayal of Dave Seville from out of the goddamn blue. ALVIN!

In Like A Lion Out Like A Robot Lion The March Guide To Science Fiction! [Io9 Calendar]

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

March may be a drab month for weather, but this month has tons of shiny new scifi waiting for you. There's the return of V, io9's Time Bender at SXSW, Roger Corman's Dinoshark, and cons and author appearances galore!

You can download the March calender as a printable PDF by clicking here.

And here are this month's convention links in chronological order:

- Animeland Wasabi
- Arkansas Anime Festival
- Metropolis Super Con
- STAPLE! Independent Media Expo
- North East Comic-Con
- Columbia Anime Con
- Megacon
- All-Con
- Anime Milwaukee
- A & G Ohio
- Kawa Kon
- Emerald City Comic Con
- SpringfestNY
- Kamikazecon
- Vericon
- Toronto Anime Con
- Toronto Comic Con
- I-Con
- Con Nichiwa
- PAX East
- Comicpalooza
- Planet Comic-Con

Got any neat events happening in March, or book releases you want to make sure we include? Drop a line to calendar@io9.com.

Design and layout by Stephanie Fox.

The 75 Books You Should Own For DC Comics 75th Anniversary [Dc Comics At 75]

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

2010 sees the 75th anniversary of DC Comics, which launched in February 1935 with the first issue of New Fun. Since then, it's gone on to publish some of the greatest comics ever. Here're seventy-five you really should've read already.

The Superman Chronicles Vol. 1
What is it? The first appearances of the world's first superhero.
Why you should read it: When it comes to historical importance, the origins of an entire genre seems like a kind of big deal, especially when that genre goes on to take over popular culture in all its forms.

The Batman Chronicles Vol. 1
What is it? The first appearances of DC's most popular character.
Why you should read it: Because they're the first appearances of Batman. Weren't you paying attention to what I said above? Also: Hello, historical significance, not to mention the chance to see how the original version of the character differs from his current incarnation(s).

All-Star Comics Archives Vol. 1
What is it? The first superhero team-ups ever published.
Why you should read it: To get a good idea about what superhero comics of the period were like, to see the first super-team in action (Or, sitting around a table telling each other stories, as the case may be), and for the "Oh, old-fashioned people!" amusement value of Wonder Woman being relegated to secretary because she's a woman.

The Spirit Archives Vol. 13
What is it? A collection of the classic newspaper strip that stretched the medium on a weekly basis by taking in influences from movies, pulp prose and anywhere creator Will Eisner could find them.
Why you should read it: Because even now, there's little with the verve and humanity of Eisner's Spirit when it's working well, and the 13th volume in particular features some classic material, including the first appearance of P'Gell, the strip's ultimate femme fatale.

The MAD Archives Vol. 1
What is it? The first six issues of the humor magazine, back when Harvey Kurtzman was running the show and it was more anarchic and wholly unlikely to rely on lazy celeb humor.
Why you should read it: To see how far the mighty have fallen, and because these're some of the greatest humor comics ever made.

Showcase Presents: Strange Adventures Vol. 1
What is it? More than 500 pages of classic 1950s pulp sci-fi anthology.
Why you should read it: In part for the historic value of seeing what comics did between periods of superhero dominance (Not to mention the historic value of seeing creators deal with atomic age paranoia), but also for the crazy plot twists and B-movie presentation that take on a new kitsch quality in this day and age.

Showcase Presents: Bat Lash
What is it? Western adventure from an era when the wild west was still enough for America.
Why you should read it: Never mind Jonah Hex, Bat Lash was a more interesting hero; more a lover than a fighter - although he was pretty good at the latter, when needed, and this strip showed off some interesting attempts to play with the genre conventions without breaking them.

Showcase Presents: Sgt. Rock Vol. 1
What is it? The first appearances of DC's premiere war hero.
Why you should read it: Rock remains one of the strips that transcended its genre, and here's where it all began, complete with some of the finest art to grace any comic, courtesy of Joe Kubert, Russ Heath and other greats.

Showcase Presents: The Flash Vol. 1
What is it? The start of the superhero revival that's kept the genre on top of the industry ever since, as well as one of the first franchise reboots, although that's not how those things were thought of at the time.
Why you should read it: To see the style and substance that made a genre live again... and also how old ideas were made contemporary back in those days (When in doubt, add entirely made-up science!).

Showcase Presents: Justice League of America Vol. 1
What is it? A large slab of the first Justice League stories ever told.
Why you should read it: For the innocence and inventiveness of Gardner Fox's writing and the underrated blocky brilliance of Mike Sekowsky's artwork, as much as the chance to see the comic that directly led to the creation of the Fantastic Four and the entire Marvel Universe.

Showcase Presents: The Doom Patrol Vol. 1
What is it? "The World's Strangest Heroes!" according to the series' own cover. While the rest of DC's superheroes were fine, upstanding and clean members of society, the DP seemed like a dysfunctional family of freaks.
Why you should read it: The weirdness of DC's pulp SF mixed with superheroics, Doom Patrol was a series curiously out of step with everything else that the company was publishing at the time, and also years ahead of itself.

Showcase Presents: House of Mystery Vol. 1
What is it? A comic book horror version of The Twilight Zone, complete with spooky host.
Why you should read it: While lacking the amount of dark humor as the classic EC horror comics of the '50s, DC's 1960s updating of their horror anthology still has enough spark to overcome the perils of censorship and Comic Code Authority-friendly chills.

Diana Prince: Wonder Woman Vol. 1
What is it? The beginning of Wonder Woman's "women's lib" makeover, which saw her stripped of her superpowers, dressing in mod outfits and fighting crime and finding adventure in a particularly skewed take on the Swinging '60s.
Why you should read it: Somewhere between kitsch guilty pleasure and interestingly different take on the Wonder Woman idea, these stories are a historical oddity that've aged surprisingly well, in an admittedly Austen Powers way.

Green Lantern/Green Arrow Vol. 1
What is it? The beginning of superhero comics' attempts to become socially relevant, starring a space cop and a former millionaire traveling America to find the true heart of the country... and themselves. No, really.
Why you should read it: Overly-earnest politics aside, there's a lot to enjoy in these stories, especially the birth of this particular color-coordinated buddy team and Neal Adams' still-impressive artwork.

Showcase Presents: Teen Titans Vol. 2
What is it? The second black and white collection of the premiere teen sidekick team as they decide to ditch the superhero outfits and join a cult. But a nice, helpful, cult. Oh, and there's some stuff about space, and race, as well.
Why you should read it: By the time the issues collected in this book were being created, it's clear that the people behind the series were looking for a new direction as its audience began to get older and demand more from their superheroes. Reading all the issues in one sitting, though, you see them trying multiple different directions one after another, which makes for an unusual but fascinating look back at a comic industry in flux and uncertain of itself.

Jack Kirby's Fourth World Vol. 2
What is it? The second collection of Marvel creator Kirby's attempt to start a new mythology of New Gods at the former competition by creating three brand-new series and overhauling Superman's sidekick into something much more interesting.
Why you should read it: Kirby's comics revitalized the superhero genre at Marvel, and by the time he was creating these issues for DC, he was at his peak - Each issue crackles with new ideas and grand themes, with the art leaping off the page. The series didn't last long enough, but what we did see was amazing.

The Legion of Super-Heroes: The Great Darkness Saga
What is it? Arguably the most popular Legion storyline of all time, written by future DC publisher and president Paul Levitz: Superteens in the 30th Century have to deal with the return of an evil god, as well as some familar faces to longtime comic fans.
Why you should read it: One of the first shortform story arcs in superhero comics, "Great Darkness Saga" is also where the Legion started to really live up to its potential, mixing fanboy Easter Eggs, soap opera and a scale that other superhero comics couldn't compete with (Planets invade other planets!).

The New Teen Titans: The Judas Contract
What is it? The most famous storyline from the comic that showed fans in the 1980s that DC could be just as daring and innovative as Marvel.
Why you should read it: With double-crosses, big fight sequences and some classic superhero soap opera angst, this feels as much more like a Marvel comic from the 1970s than anything else, but it's a great example of what the cutting edge of comics looked like at the beginning of the decade that would change everything.

Saga of The Swamp Thing Vol. 1
What is it? Alan Moore's first American work, and the one that led to Watchmen as well as a couple of really bad movies of its own.
Why you should read it: Because it's a genuinely groundbreaking (No pun intended, etc.) work that still stands up to today's standards, and a chance to read early Alan Moore before he started to worship an imaginary deity and fall out with everyone. Plus, it's a masterclass in how to reinvent what seemed like a tired old idea and make it something new and unexpected.

Showcase Presents: Ambush Bug
What is it? An almost-complete collection of the series that poked fun at comic fans, comic culture, DC Comics and itself.
Why you should read it: Keith Giffen and Robert Loren Fleming managed to find the right mix of snark and affection for their antennaed creation, making the evisceration of their own publisher all the sweeter, in multiple ways. The latter, Ambush Bug Nothing Special, at the end of the collection is especially fun.

Crisis On Infinite Earths
What is it? "Worlds will live! Worlds will die! And the DC Universe will never be the same!" DC celebrated its 50th birthday by changing all their rules, killing characters, rebooting other ones and it all centered around this epic series full of cosmic drama and fanservice.
Why you should read it: Probably still the benchmark for superhero crossovers, Crisis is a rare example of a series that actually delivered on its promise that nothing would be the same again, as well as a textbook example of superhero comics straining to become more complex while still having each character introduced by name in dialogue for the benefit of the reader.

Batman: The Dark Knight Returns
What is it? Frank Miller's first recreation of Batman, this time as a cranky old man who's mad as hell and isn't going to take it anymore.
Why you should read it: Because, two decades later, this mix of social satire, gritty superheroics and angry optimism still thrills as much as it gets misinterpreted.

Watchmen
What is it? Oh, come on. You know exactly what it is. There was even this small film made of it last year, maybe you heard something about that?
Why you should read it: Love it or hate it, Alan Moore and Dave Gibbons changed superheroes forever with this complex, formally-experimental, dense work. And even if you don't care about superheroes, anyone with an interest in comics will find themselves appreciating the execution of the story. A masterpiece, if an overrated one.

Batman: Year One
What is it? Frank Miller's second recreation of Batman (This time with David Mazzuchelli), this time as a cranky young man who's not necessarily the best at what he does yet.
Why you should read it: To my mind, superior to The Dark Knight, Year One remakes Batman into the noir hero fitting against a corrupt city - and winning - that he's always meant to be successfully for the first time. With sparse writing and amazing artwork, Batman may never have been better than he is here.

Superman: Whatever Happened To The Man Of Tomorrow
What is it? Alan Moore's send-off to the Superman of his youth, complete with all the goofier trappings of more innocent times, illustrated by the classic Superman artist, Curt Swan.
Why you should read it: Literally the end of an era, Moore and Swan got to provide an imaginary ending to Superman's Never Ending Battle prior to the character's 1986 reboot that celebrated his past with only a slight hint of pessimism and bitterness. As a plus, the new Whatever Happened collection also includes Moore's other Superman stories, which are well worth reading as well.

Batman: The Killing Joke
What is it? The archetypal Batman Vs. Joker story, by Moore and Brian Bolland.
Why you should read it: It's the book that launched a thousand ships, if "ships" were code for "psychological explanations for the duality between Batman and his most famous foe." But even if you don't like the armchair psychology, how can you deny that artwork?

The History Of The DC Universe
What is it? Having destroyed and recreated the DC Universe in Crisis, creators Marv Wolfman and George Perez tried to pull it all together in this look back (and forward) at how everything happened in the revised timeline.
Why you should read it: An odd curio, this piece of continuity repair was already outdated as soon as it was published, but it demonstrates that there was, at one point, a plan behind the rewriting of history, even if that plan - like the cylons' - was quickly abandoned by reality.

Batman: A Death In The Family
What is it? The Joker kills Robin - Or does he? You decide, with the help of a well-made phone call!
Why you should read it: The in-questionable-taste phone-in stunt that killed off Batman's partner may not be of the highest quality, storywise, but for historical value alone, this is one of the more important books in the DC library. Never forget. Brave soldier.

Justice League International Vol. 1
What is it? A reaction to the grimness of Watchmen and the comics it influenced, creators Keith Giffen, JM DeMatteis and Kevin Maguire took over DC's premiere superteam and turned it into a sitcom... and it worked.
Why you should read it: The first issues of the series are less comedically-broad than it became later, but that's to its benefit; eager to please and dripping with flop sweat, this is classic JLI at its best before success made them lazy.

Animal Man Vol. 3: Deus Ex Machina
What is it? The final volume in a run that took an obscure, forgotten superhero and made him into one of the most human characters at the company.
Why you should read it: Maybe unrecognized as such as the time, Grant Morrison's first American series is the greatest reaction to Watchmen-inspired doom-and-gloom, celebrating the less-than-serious characters lost in the rush to claim maturity and bringing a humanity and kindness to writing that was already trending towards the cruel.

The Sandman: Fables and Reflections
What is it? A collection of short stories from the run of Neil Gaiman's famous Sandman series.
Why you should read it: Taking the baton of fantasy storytelling champion from Moore, Gaiman's Sandman brought even greater respectability to comics (and DC in particular); this anthology of shorts is probably the best taster of what to expect, as well as a great showcase for the many artists involved.

V For Vendetta
What is it? A particularly British take on revolution and politics, both personal and party, in Alan Moore and David Lloyd's 1980s future dystopia.
Why you should read it: Rescued from the canceled pages of British anthology Warrior, V lacks the reputation and impact of Watchmen, Swamp Thing or even Killing Joke, but it's better than any of them; quieter, more subtle and warmer, with characters more flawed and human.

Why I Hate Saturn
What is it? A tale of life in the big city, love and sisters who think they're from another planet.
Why you should read it: Kyle Baker's second graphic novel (following the equally wonderful The Cowboy Wally Show) is that rare thing: A comic for adults that doesn't feel self-conscious about that fact. It's also another rare thing: A genuinely hilarious comedy comic.

Enigma
What is it? One of the first real "What if there were superheroes in the real world?" comics, as well as one of the first superhero comics to not apologize for, or hide, its gay characters.
Why you should read it: Peter Milligan and Duncan Fegredo's early-'90s series was rescued by DC from a failed Disney comics line, and placed at the center of their Vertigo launch, deservedly. Smart, funny and surprisingly touching, it's an underrated classic.

Static Shock: Rebirth Of The Cool
What is it? A collection of the first issues of later-to-be-a-Saturday-morning-cartoon Static (along with a more recent revival of the character) from Milestone Media.
Why you should read it: Ignore all the talk of Milestone's racial diversity - as worthy as it may be - and focus on the stories, because Static (co-created by Dwayne McDuffie, who'd later find some fame on the Justice League cartoon) and the other Milestone books were some of the best superhero series of the early-to-mid 1990s, bringing energy to the genre in a way that hadn't been seen in years. Static, an update on the Spider-Man formula, was one of the best of the line.

Batman: Mad Love And Other Stories
What is it? A collection of comics from Bruce Timm and Paul Dini, the men behind the awesome 1990s Batman: The Animated Series.
Why you should read it: As fun as their cartoon counterparts, these stories also showed off some impressive comic storytelling chops, especially from Timm's dynamic artwork.

Understanding Comics
What is it? Scott McCloud's guide to the medium, how it works, and its potential.
Why you should read it: Another book rescued from a defunct publisher by DC, McCloud's textbook explains the medium so well that it should pretty much be required reading for anyone who's interested in comics in the slightest.

The Invisibles Vol. 1: Say You Want A Revolution
What is it? The beginning of Grant Morrison's series about revolution, anarchy, freedom and the 1990s. Later ripped off shamelessly by The Matrix.
Why you should read it: Because it's the starting point for one of the more ambitious (and, at times, successful in fulfilling that ambition) series of the last couple of decades, one that captured a pre-millennial zeitgeist in more ways than even its creators realized. Other volumes may contain more impressive work - the final chapter still feels like one of the most science-fictional comics ever made - but this is where it all began.

Starman Omnibus Vol. 1
What is it? Bucking the trend for gritted-teeth, shoulder pads and heroes that kill, James Robinson and Tony Harris' mid-90s superhero series offered a quieter, more reflective take on the genre at a time when it needed one.
Why you should read it: One of those series that feels like it never quite got the attention is was due at the time, Starman may be the Velvet Underground of comics; you can feel its influence in Geoff Johns', Brian Michael Bendis' and others' writing today.

Preacher Vol. 1
What is it? The beginning of Garth Ennis and Steve Dillon's blasphemous tale of religion and America. Oh, and vampires, as well. And guys with faces that look like assholes, literally. I think that about covers it.
Why you should read it: This was where Ennis and Dillon, both former 2000AD creators, managed to bring all their influences together and created what's still the closest thing in tone to 2000AD in American comics: Simultaneously funny, heartbreaking and sacreligious, it's a love letter to times and places that never really existed, and faith in things other than God. Plus, of course, there's all the ridiculous toilet humor.

Stuck Rubber Baby
What is it? Devoid of supernatural or superhuman elements, Howard Cuse's story of civil rights, homosexuality and bigotry is nonetheless more compelling than a hundred Crises on Infinite Earths.
Why you should read it: Simply because it's that good.

Kurt Busiek's Astro City: Life In The Big City
What is it? Busiek went from Marvels' man-on-the-street look at well-known superheroes to creating his own heroes, men, street and world in this still-ongoing series as much about the superhero genre itself as its characters.
Why you should read it: At once filled with a nostalgia and entirely its own thing, Astro City shows Busiek's skills as a writer off to a degree that even high-profile gigs like Avengers and Trinity can't, allowing him a freedom to tell whatever stories he wants, ably assisted by artist Brent Anderson and cover artist/designer Alex Ross. Life In The Big City, the first volume, is as good a place to start as any.

Kingdom Come
What is it? An apocalyptic end to DC's superheroic debauchery, set in a future populated with older versions of the familiar heroes, plus new characters full of Easter Eggs for longtime fans.
Why you should read it: Whether you're looking for meta-textual commentary on the state of 1990s comics, injokes about DC continuity and characters (or, in one case, the Monkees) or just a straight-forward tale about the potential end of the world being well told, Alex Ross and Mark Waid's uber-epic delivers.

Road To Perdition
What is it? Depression-era crime drama, courtesy of writer Max Allen Collins and Richard Piers Rayner. Later adapted into a Tom Hanks movie version.
Why you should read it: A more sober take on the manga Lone Wolf and Cub, Perdition's crime comic do-over is, like Stuck Rubber Baby above, a reminder not only of what comics can offer outside of the superhero and SF genres, but also of DC's support of less obvious moneyspinners.

Transmetropolitan: Back On The Street
What is it? Warren Ellis' American breakthrough, an SF series that mixes Hunter S. Thompson, William Gibson and a healthy dislike of any and all politicians. Also, the thing that introduced the term "filthy assistant" to the world. Thanks for that. No, really.
Why you should read it: Part-pastiche of familiar elements, part-distillation of Ellis' personality into pure comic form (with more-than-able assistance from artist Darick Robertson), the 60-issue series builds to something that's much more than the sum of its parts. On the unlikely chance that you haven't already read this, Back On The Street - the first collection - is the place to start.

JLA: Rock Of Ages
What is it? The time-traveling, alternate-reality heart of Grant Morrison's over-the-top version of the Justice League of America.
Why you should read it: The story where the madness of his Invisibles infected his grand-scale take on DC's #1 superteam, Rock of Ages takes two separate large ideas - "What if there was an evil version of the Justice League?" and "What if the bad guys won, and took over the Earth?" - and pushed them together in a different way than you'd expect, linked by a McGuffin with unlimited powers and some time travel. Brimming over with ideas and invention, superhero comics have rarely been better - and Morrison's JLA never was.

The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen Vol. 1
What is it? Alan Moore and Kevin O'Neill take the ultimate literary game of What If and make it work as a story.
Why you should read it: Crossing over genres and characters from various public domain stories, what makes LOEG work is that it doesn't always go for the obvious idea, but what makes the first volume work in a way that later volumes didn't is that it doesn't always go for the "Oh, look how smart we are" idea, either. An impressive, but accessible, intelligent story about stories.

Absolute Promethea Vol. 1
What is it? The first year of Alan Moore and JH Williams III's celebration of female power in fiction and comic books, in oversized hardcover format.
Why you should read it: What may, in other hands, have been a Wonder Woman rip-off becomes something much more involving and deep as concepts of magic and gender are explored through the prism of superhero comics. Even if Moore starts to become self-indulgent at times throughout this volume, Williams' stunning art keeps the reader's interest (especially in the larger format) and brings a necessary heart and gravity to the story.

The Golden Age
What is it? An alternate history look at McCarthyism, nuclear paranoia and a country so afraid of itself, it forgets not to demonize those who seek to protect it.
Why you should read it: Starman creator James Robinson brings a stoicness and seriousness to the last days of the WWII-era Justice Society, as well as some fun for alternate history buffs to chew on. Paul Smith's artwork is also suitably strong.

The Absolute Authority Vol. 1
What is it? The complete run of Warren Ellis and Bryan Hitch's tenure on the increasingly-stakes-raising superhero team to end all superhero teams.
Why you should read it: Arguably the most influential superhero comic - at least in terms of comics that Marvel have taken their cues from over the last decade - in recent memory, Authority is what happened when Ellis and Hitch decided to take the superhero genre as far as they could.

100%
What is it? Paul Pope's (much-discussed-by-me-here) SF story of life and love and art in a post-Philip K. Dick, post-John Cassavetes future.
Why you should read it: Fully-realized and heartfelt, Pope's story avoids SF cliche while seeming more involving and future-facing than most around him.

Absolute Planetary Vol. 1
What is it? The first half of Warren Ellis and John Cassaday's genre-exploration mystery series, excavating genres and ideas lain dormant for too long.
Why you should read it: The home to an optimism that occasionally gets hidden in Ellis' other work, Planetary shines with a love of stories and ideas, even if you chose to ignore the metatext and just read it as a straight adventure mystery. Plus, Cassaday's art (with colors by Laura Martin) is amazing.

Hellblazer: Haunted
What is it? Keeping with Ellis, the first half of his tragically short run on Vertigo's flagship title and character, John Constantine.
Why you should read it: Every writer writes a slightly different version of the long-running magical bastard, and Ellis offers up a melancholy, poetic take, haunted by past decisions and the people missing from his life. Just as important, though, the sense of place that he brought to the title made it feel more grounded and real than ever.

Sleeper: Season 1
What is it? Donnie Brasco gone darker, with added superpowers and hopelessness.
Why you should read it: A classic of noir nihilism, Ed Brubaker and Sean Philips' first collaboration set the bar high for everything that followed (Criminal, Incognito) and remains one of the best, and most satisfying, superhero series of the last decade.

Wildcats Version 3.0: Brand Building
What is it? The onetime premiere 1990s superteam tries to save the world by going corporate and selling salvation to everyone.
Why you should read it: Joe Casey and Dustin Nguyen's ballsy corporate rebranding may not have been for everyone - It clearly wasn't, as the series was canceled two years in - but it was smart and stylish, and a new take on some very old ideas. Considering the backroom politics that Marvel's Dark Reign sold itself on for the last year, it may also have been just a few years ahead of its time.

Gotham Central Vol. 2: Jokers and Madmen
What is it? Batman's world turned into a police procedural, as Gotham's police department take center stage during a Joker-led attack on the city.
Why you should read it: All of Gotham Central is highly recommended, as writers Greg Rucka and Ed Brubaker brought a tightness and personality to the mix of crime fiction and superheroics (with some great art from Michael Lark and others), but the stories in this volume are particularly strong, and contain more than a few hints that they may have influenced The Dark Knight movie.

100 Bullets Vol. 1: First Shot, Last Call
What is it? Crime noir that spins from high concept to wide-reaching criminal conspiracy.
Why you should read it: The series that brought a new edge to crime comics - and, in the process, proved that there was a market for books like this again - started with a simple idea (What would you do if a stranger offered you the chance for revenge, with no strings attached?) and grew from there into something impressively labyrinthine. Brian Azzarello's scripting is taut and fast, but the star is really Eduardo Risso's art.

Y: The Last Man Vol. 1: Unmanned
What is it? The End Of The World As We Know It, as all males die for mysterious reasons with the exception of one man and his monkey, leaving them alone in a world trying to rebuild itself.
Why you should read it: Containing new spins on old ideas throughout its run, Brian K. Vaughan and Pia Guerra's post-apocalyptic road movie was smart enough and pulp enough to win over fans throughout its five-plus year run, including Lost's writing staff, who hired Vaughan midway through the series.

The Filth
What is it? A particularly skewed take on many SF ideas, from parallel universes, miniature Earths, and giant alien sperm that becomes a treatise on the value of the discarded and corrupt.
Why you should read it: A bizarre story that looks beyond shock value to try and redeem ideas others leave behind, Grant Morrison and Chris Weston's Filth may make you feel uneasy along the way, but that's partially the point.

Ex Machina Deluxe Edition Vol. 1
What is it? The West Wing meets Watchmen, to use a high concept analogy.
Why you should read it: Brian K. Vaughan's second high profile DC creation (with Starman artist Tony Harris) mixes pop (culture) and politics with its hero, a former superhero turned New York City mayor. But it's the character interaction - and political naivete of its hero - that makes this series worthwhile.

Fables Deluxe Edition Vol. 1
What is it? What happened after the Happily Ever Afters at the end of all your childhood fairy tales, once everyone involved has grown up a bit.
Why you should read it: Funny, smart and only cynical in the right places, Bill Willingham takes what may not be an original idea and makes the best of it, coming up with unexpected combinations of characters, modern takes on old concepts and managing to make it all seem as effortless and fun as the original fairy tales themselves. If you sign up for the whole series, there's a lot to be said for the evolution of artist Mark Buckingham into a mix of Jack Kirby and Mike Mignola, too.

Bizarro Comics
What is it? Almost a decade before Marvel did the same thing to much acclaim with Strange Tales, some of indie comics' biggest names offer up their take on DC's most well-known superheroes.
Why you should read it: Most respectful than you might expect, some of the stories in this anthology seem to display greater understanding of the characters than their regular counterparts. Also, Kyle Baker's Letitia Lerner, Superman's Babysitter may be the greatest cartoon never made.

Human Target: Chance Meetings
What is it? Reviving an old, forgotten 1970s creation (Now, of course, a Fox TV show, but that wasn't the case back then), this is a tense psychodrama where there's no guarantee that anyone is who they seem to be - or think they are, either.
Why you should read it: Peter Milligan's subtle writing is matched by Edvin Biukovic and Javier Pulido's art, giving this pulp thriller an energy and grit that the TV version, as fun as it is, is completely lacking so far.

We3
What is it? Cyborg pets versus the world. Really, that's all you should need to know, other than the fact that your heart will be broken by the end of it, or else you are made of stone.
Why you should read it: The Incredible Journey with added SF may not sound like a classic, but somewhere along the way, Grant Morrison and Frank Quitely's short series about three animals escaping from a military lab became a masterpiece. Whether it's the writing that manages to give each animal personality without seeming gimmicky (Stink Boss, indeed) or Quitely's breathtaking storytelling and design, this is a book that's the definition of "Better Than It Has Any Right To Be."

DC: The New Frontier
What is it? A retelling of the origins of the Silver Age DC Universe, set in the time period during which the stories were originally published.
Why you should read it: Amazingly stylish, Darwyn Cooke's visuals for the book would make it worthwhile even if the story wasn't as good as it is (In this case, "good" can be defined as "Large scale yet intimate, thrilling, and full of optimism and drama"); if there was such a thing as Mad Men for comics, it'd be this.

Green Lantern: Rebirth
What is it? The return from death of Silver Age Green Lantern Hal Jordan, accompanied by all manner of guest-stars (And the beginning of the story that led to the current Blackest Night mega-event).
Why you should read it: Even if you're not interested in Lanterns of Green or any other color, Rebirth has historic value as the beginning of the current era of mainstream DC superheroes; written by Geoff Johns, now DC Entertainment CEO, this series set the tone that has since spread across the entire DC Universe line.

Seven Soldiers of Victory Vol. 1
What is it? A massive 30-part storyline that both connects and runs independently of all of its individual moving parts, revamping forgotten characters, creating new ones and revitalizing genres along the way.
Why you should read it: As much formalist exercise as story (stories), the Seven Soldiers banner linked eight different series (One for each Soldier, plus a Seven Soldiers two-parter to bring it all together) and multiple storylines that overlapped, crossed over and colored each other to varying degrees. An amazing example of writing from Grant Morrison, backed with equally impressive art from an army of artists including Cameron Stewart, Doug Mahnke and others.

52 Vol. 1
What is it? DC's year-long weekly series that tried to lay the ground rules for how things worked in their rebooted universe.
Why you should read it: For something with no big-name stars and the stated aim to show how politics, religion, magic and other such areas worked in the New DC Universe, 52 could've ended up the most insular, fanservicey comic ever made. That it was, instead, easy-to-understand and exciting-to-follow speaks to the skills of its four-man writing team (Geoff Johns, Greg Rucka, Mark Waid and Grant Morrison) and the strength of its core concepts.

Wonder Woman: Who is Wonder Woman?
What is it? The latest attempt to reposition Wonder Woman as something that new readers could enjoy, by recalling the Lynda Carter-era for the first time in decades, and adding some Alias-style spy chic.
Why you should read it: Gail Simone's current WW run may be quantifiably better in terms of quality, but there's something endearing about the way in which it was set up by Allan Heinberg and Terry Dodson's gleeful return of all the classic superheroic elements to the character, including secret identity (and twirling-to-change-outfits!), supervillains and excitable action scenes. It's an oddity for WW, if only to see the character being approached without the warrior gravity that's become her trademark over the last few decades, but it's also an undeniable pleasure... if a bit of a guilty one.

The Winter Men
What is it? The superhero concept is translated to Russia for a political comedic drama that is almost David Simon-esque.
Why you should read it: Brett Lewis' story finds a grim humor in its subject matter unusual for comics, while John Paul Leon's art matches it in blocky brilliance. For a genre so old and, it seems at times, played out, this is something that feels new and worthwhile.

Doctor 13: Architecture and Mortality
What is it? Self-commenting metatext about the nature of continuity reboots and the growing seriousness of comic books wrapped up in a story about a man who may be the ultimate skeptic.
Why you should read it: Brian Azzarello and Cliff Chiang's under-the-radar series (It ran as a second strip in Tales of The Unexpected but gained a fanbase online, leading to its collection) may have its tongue firmly placed in its cheek, but there's something charming nonetheless about seeing forgotten characters like I... Vampire and Genius Jones proclaim their worth to the audience while begging to appear in future comics.

All Star Superman
What is it? I'll go ahead and say it: Probably the only Superman comic you'll ever need.
Why you should read it: Didn't you read that part about it being the only Superman comic you'll ever need? Okay, I'll go on: Grant Morrison and Frank Quitely's 12-issue tour of Superman mythology touches on all the core ideas, and introduces new ones along the way, managing to distill everything important about the character, his supporting cast and the appeal of the whole thing into less than 400 pages of material. Recapping his origin story in eight words is only the start of their genius.

Water Baby
What is it? From the short-lived Minx line, a story about a teenage girl who loses a leg from a shark attack while surfing.
Why you should read it: Although deemed unsuccessful by the powers that be, the Minx line offered an alternative to manga for teen girls into comics, and Water Baby may have been one of the strongest of the line, pulling few punches in terms of content and refusing to speak down to its audience.

Bayou Vol. 1
What is it? Magical realist fantasy, set in a depression-era town south of the Mason-Dixon line.
Why you should read it: The first product of DC's online comics line Zuda, Bayou is a sensitive (At times, too much; the censorship of the word "nigger" is oddly intrusive while reading; either use the word or don't - "n*****" is doing neither) series that mixes pop-culture influences like Pogo and Song Of The South into a racially-charged story that plays like Alice In Wonderland in reverse. Unlike anything else DC publish, Bayou's success speaks, perhaps, to the audience who want to read comics but don't trek to the store every Wednesday for that week's new releases.

Blackest Night
What is it? The latest Big Event comic, wherein death itself is redefined, and the birthplace of all life is identified once and for all.
Why you should read it: Perhaps cheating by including it here - The collected edition isn't available until June - but no other selection would more clearly display the state of DC Comics today: Coming from grand ideas and reaching for an epic scale, but filled with moments of smaller, more relatable drama to demonstrate that - hey! - these characters are human, too, Blackest Night successfully straddles the divide between the soap opera popularized by Marvel's superheroes that's become the bread-and-butter of comics fans for decades and the big ideas that made DC's reputation in the 1950s (and even before) - But is that something that other comics can continue to do?

Caprica Is Quickly Becoming The Best SF Show On Television [Caprica Recap]

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Friday night's episode of Caprica, "There Is Another Sky," moved the already-intriguing show to the status of must-watch. It was simply one of the best SF representations of futuristic videogames and internet culture that I've ever seen.

Caprica was occasionally shaky in its first few weeks, but with this episode the series found its sea legs. We're learning more about the V-World that mega-entrepreneur Daniel Graystone created with his holoband technology. And in the process we find out what artificial sentience really means, and how Daniel intends to exploit it.

For the past several episodes we've focused on the fate of Daniel's daughter Zoe, killed in a terrorist attack on a train. Before she died, however, Zoe left a virtual, sentient version of herself in V-World - an avatar that Daniel locates and coercively downloads onto a chip which he sticks into one of his military cylon prototypes. Though Daniel thinks this destroyed the Zoe avatar, in fact she's still inside the cylon, biding her time until she can escape. During the brief moment when Daniel thought the Zoe avatar still existed, he created a similar avatar of Joseph Adama's daughter Tamara. While Zoe has escaped to the real world in her cyborg body, Tamara remains trapped inside V-World - her father thinks her avatar got erased somehow, and Zoe doesn't actually realize Tamara is a real person. She's completely alone in a universe that's a cross between Grand Theft Auto and the Sin City movie.

What's worse than being a teenage girl trapped in the body of a massive robot? Being a teenage girl trapped in the collective fantasy of a million other teenagers. And that's exactly what's happening to Tamara, as she tries to find her way home. After what is apparently weeks of wandering through dance clubs and orgy rooms, she falls in with a group of game hackers and modders who promise to get her out of V-World. If she promises to do them one little favor. You see, Tamara has a superpower in V-World: Unlike every other gamer, who accesses the place via holoband, she can't be killed when you shoot her. She just heals up and stays in the game. She's basically the perfect mod for cheating, and that's exactly what the gang - led by a very Mondo 2000-looking lady named Vesta - wants her to do.

So Tamara goes with one of the hot game modders into "New Cap City," a game that's a perfect replica of Caprica City, except lawless. Nobody knows how to win the game, and nobody can go back once they've been "derezzed" with a gun. But the hot game modder thinks the point of the game is to earn money, so he's going to use Tamara's powers to steal the avatar of the game's richest player and convert that money to points (interestingly, there's no hint that this money can be exchanged for real-world money like Lindenbucks or WOW gold - which you'd think would be the case). While Tamara gets into a shootup with the rich guy, gamer boy "steals" the code for his avatar and manages to break into the rich guy's bank and suck up gold coins. In the ensuing shootout with guards, Tamara becomes the One, like Neo in the Matrix. She discovers she can alter the code of V-World simply by willing it. Of course, she still trapped in V-World forever.

Are Tamara's powers now more awesome than Zoe's? The answer to that question is what makes this episode pure genius.

Daniel is about to be ousted from his company after announcing that they will be making holoband code free, no longer requiring people to pay a licensing fee for it. But he convinces the board to keep him by giving this speech, which is almost ripped from today's headlines about the music and movie industry's efforts to stay profitable in a world where everybody expects media to be free online.

If you think about it, the message here is both weird and chilling. If we can't sell media online, we'll just sell slaves instead. That's right, kids. All that pirating you're doing of media? It's forcing media companies to change their business models from selling content to selling sentient beings. Why doesn't the RIAA consider that?

In all seriousness, though, the more I think about this scene, the more loaded it is. That moment where Zoe rips her own arm off to please Daddy is horrifying and powerful. Though Daniel doesn't realize it, he's suggesting that his company sell his daughter in order to make up for the profits it has lost by giving away V-World access for free.

Plus we've got this scenario where Tamara controls the world of what you might call "old media," while Zoe controls the new. She's inside the body of a creature who could bring the V-World into the real world. Why put on your holoband and visit a virtual wargame when you could just go to a warehouse full of humanoid cylons and act out your bloodthirsty urges on real creatures who can never disobey? And that's the future of Graystone Industries - the business that comes after the business of holoband entertainment that they've been in for over a decade.

While the V-World and cylon marketplace plotlines heated up, we also got our first real look at how much the Adama family has changed in the aftermath of the maglev bombing. Joseph has finally returned to his Tauron ways, going through a traditional funeral ceremony and tattooing for his wife and daughter. And little Willie has become disobedient and violent, preferring his uncle Sam's gangster den to school. He even beats up a kid who calls him a Tauron dirt-eater.

Then, just as it seems that Joseph and Willie have declared peace at the funeral, their world is disrupted by the Graystones once again. Tamara has sent her hot game modder boy to go out into the real world and find her father so she can get help. Gameboy arrives at the funeral, thinking all he has to do is ask Joseph to wake his daughter up. Instead, he finds out that Tamara is dead. And Joseph now knows his daughter is actually alive, albeit in an extremely altered, gun-toting form. She's becoming the mightiest gangster in V-World.

The Adamas and the Graystones are now tied together in all kinds of disturbing ways. Both families have given birth to radically new forms of life: A sentient robot, and a sentient avatar. And both are also tied together by crime. By that I mean the crime committed by Sam to get Zoe's chip, but also the crime of experimenting on humans without consent. Zoe and Tamara have both been made engineering experiments against their wills. And that is a crime that the Graystones and Adamas will be paying for throughout this series.

From its humble origins as a spinoff of Battlestar Galactica, Caprica has grown into a terrific show in its own right. A show that nimbly asks big questions about the nature of sentience and justice, while also spinning a terrific yarn about old-fashioned gangsters in a world of high-tech corporate warfare.

This is definitely not Battlestar Galactica anymore. It's something else. And you'll be sorry if you don't tune in to find out more.

5 Imaginary Movies About Your Favorite Childhood Games [Steal This Pitch]

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Hollywood's latest retro craze is board games, what with Ridley Scott directing an alternate dimension Monopoly movie and Peter Berg helming a Battleship flick about aliens. But what if other directors made game movies? What if Joss Whedon directed POGs?

We don't know what's weirder - the fact that board games are the new hot target of Hollywood nostalgia-whoring, or that these upcoming game movies are tapping science fiction tropes for inspiration. What if this trend continues to snowball in the years to come? Join io9 as we ponder a creatively bankrupt future in which some of our favorite auteurs have put a scifi spin on otherwise plotless childhood games.

5.) Darren Aronofsky's Pac-Man

Genre: Paranormal noir
Plot: Guillaume Homme-Pac is a mentally-ill pensioner who lives in Sunset Park, Brooklyn. He is a recluse and only leaves the apartment to purchase anti-psychotic medication which he hoards using a number of forged prescriptions. He consumes near toxic amounts of these pills nightly, for every evening he is visited by four mysterious ghosts - Arnaud, Patrice, Benoît, and Clyde - who chase Monsieur Homme-Pac through the diseased labyrinths of his own mind. Although the medication keeps the apparitions at bay, it is eroding Homme-Pac's health and sanity.

Monsieur Homme-Pac's ex-wife Josette lives down the hallway from him. She still loves and cares for Guillaume, but his delusions placed an insurmountable strain on their marriage. Madame Homme-Pac is never seen without her trademark vermilion Givenchy beret. Josette supplies her husband with the prescriptions, but she hates herself for doing so. Unbeknownst to Guillaume, she too is haunted by four ghosts - Inès, Paulette, Babette, and Sue.

Cast:
Guillaume Homme-Pac: Jean Reno
Josette Homme-Pac: Sophie Marceau
Clyde: Flea

Sample Scene:
[JOSETTE knocks on the GUILLAUME'S DOOR. He answers, smoking a Gitanes Blondes. Cue Clint Mansell ambient track.]

GUILLAUME: Jo.

JOSETTE: I heard you last night. I heard you yelling again. About the maze, the blue walls. I heard it all.

GUILLAUME: [impassively] Why were you up at that hour?

JOSETTE: [ pauses and looks away] You woke me. I brought you this.

[She foists a brown grocery bag into GUILLAUME'S hands. It is filled with fruit. He picks up a box of Super Pretzels that is oddly on top. He eyeballs it, face blank.]

JOSETTE: They were on sale.

GUILLAUME: Food will not make them go away.

JOSETTE: When will they go away?

GUILLAUME: When I drill a hole in my head. When I spiral into nothing. When someone trips on the plug.

[He slams the door.]

4.) J.J. Abrams' Candy Land

Genre: Time-travel espionage thriller
Plot: On the day of her high school graduation, Threnody Crisco receives a letter from her father, who died before she was born. It turns out he is still alive and the king of the Kan-Di, a time-traveling race of hyper-evolved homo sapiens who have been stranded in the past. Even worse, he and his royal court are being vivisected in Compound 47, a high-tech prison secretly owned by Japanese confectionery conglomerate Tagruato.The corporation is experimenting on the Kan-Di and attempting to reverse-engineering Threnody's father's chrono-jumping beacon, "The Red Gumdrop."

In addition to saving her dad, Threnody must defeat her duplicitous uncle Lord Cassius Lucreze (who exiled King Kan-Di to the past) and her mother, the supercilious Queen Frostine. Little does Threnody know that Lord Lucreze has been plotting against her for years. Her boyfriend, University of Michigan frosh Gus Glopert, is actually a shape-shifting assassin and Lucreze's #2, General Glopius.

Cast:
Threnody Crisco: Keri Russell
King Kan-Di: Lance Reddick
Lord Cassius Lucreze: Nestor Carbonell
Queen Frostine: Maggie Q
The Grand Matriarch Filbert: Simon Pegg
Gus Glopert/General Glopius: Ian Somerhalder/Terry O'Quinn
Magic Overalls (voice): Carlton Cuse

3.) Werner Herzog's Tic-Tac-Toe

Genre: Post-apocalyptic rumination among the ruins
Plot: In an unfathomable future, only two beings exist: X and O, immortal god-kings driven insane by technology and solitude. They divide the ruined world between, partitioning the globe into nations of which they are the sole citizens. X and O are deathless, and this pointless war game is the only pastime they know. They have forgotten their names, family, and scruples. Like Cain and Abel, they only know the barbarity that is the pith of civilization.

X and O continue this Manichean frivolity until the sun supernovas. Only then will Earth finally become a proper Hell, baptized by fire.

Cast:
O: Brad Dourif
X: Dolph Lundgren (with the digitally superimposed face of Klaus Kinski)
Grizzly bear: Nicolas Cage

Sample Scene:
[X and O stare into each other's eyes. They stand in burnt chaparral.]

X: X.

O: O.

X: X.

O: O.

[A GRIZZLY BEAR ambles by. It dies of significance.]

X: X.

[THE SUN supernovas.]

2.) Paul Verhoeven's Snakes and Ladders

Genre: Erotic bio-horror
Plot: In a dystopian Detroit, a strange phenomenon occurs every night. Strange golden ladders materialize on the street, beckoning men to climb up. Those who have lived virtuously are rewarded with a naked gambol with a three-breasted woman; those men who have committed injustices encounter a hungry three-headed hydra, who vomits their bones onto the boulevards below. Detectives Quaid Hauser and Malone Nomi must end the creature's deadly feast. But whereas Detective Hauser seeks to crack the beast's seemingly arbitrary moral code - indeed, she condemns decent men for their childhood rascalities - the cybernetic Detective Nomi has but one imperative: bug hunt.

Cast:
Detective Quaid Hauser: Kurtwood Smith
Detective Malone Nomi: Casper Van Dien
Three-Breasted Woman: Gina Gershon
Victim No. 4: Jake Busey

1.) Joss Whedon's POGs

Genre: Slumber party space odyssey
Plot: Earth is under the thrall of the so-called "POG Tribunal," which consists of three despotic demon races: the Ankylosaurus-like "Pineapples," the mottled, vampiric "Oranges," and the "Guavas," who look like exactly like humans but smell vaguely of fruit punch. The POGs have barricaded our planet behind a impenetrable force field and are mind-wiping all survivors for use as domestics. Earth has only one hope to break this barricade: the starship Slammer, which is piloted by a trio of brassy sorceresses known as the Furies. The Furies are perpetually accompanied by their janitor, Ralston, who suffers from psychosomatic erectile dysfunction.

Cast:
Maxi Fleetfoot: Charisma Carpenter
Mag Sammich: Eliza Dushku
Lt. Zeena Spandau: Summer Glau
Ralston: Alan Tudyk

Sample Scene:
[Interior of the Slammer. RALSTON has some down time and is enjoying his favorite hobby: macramé]

RALSTON: The sooner I macramé this ski cap, the sooner my ears will be warm. Mmmm, macraméy.

[MAG SAMMICH, MAXI FLEETFOOT, and ZEENA SPANDAU stride in.]

MAG: Get the fuck out of here, Ralston. The Herkies need the conference room.

["The Herkies," of course, is the Furies' pet term for themselves, as they compare their gang of space vigilantes to the 1960s Hanna-Barbera cartoon The Herculoids.]

RALSTON: Sigh. Now it is time for me to be alone. In space. Appropriate.

[RALSTON shambles off. He falls asleep in an air lock and asphyxiates whilst clutching a pair of gym shorts he purloined from Zeena's boudoir.]

What Will And Wont Be Revealed In Losts Final Episodes [Lost]

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

With Lost hurtling towards its series finale, the cast and writers of the show appeared at this year's Paleyfest armed with answers, spoilers and teases - As well as a promise we're sure they can't keep. You've been warned!

At last night's panel, part of the 27th annual William S. Paley Television Festival in LA, the show's creators talked about what a Disney - which owns ABC, the network that Lost airs on - park Lost ride would be like (Damon Lindelof imagined "a dark room in which you spin around repeatedly before getting hit in the face"), potential spin-offs (Writer Eddy Kitsis joked about a show about a real estate broker trying to sell property on the island) and an unexpected attitude towards post-finale publicity: Co-Showrunner Carlton Cuse told the audience that they do not plan to comment on the finale once it's been broadcast. While we wait for them to reconsider that attitude, they also teased a lot about questions we're still waiting on answers to; Entertainment Weekly helpfully broke it down for us:

The answer is "yes" to the following: Will Richard and Ilana exchange some words soon? Will we see another painting by Bender? Do some of the characters' last names have significance, particularly Jack's? Is Jack married to someone we've met before? Was Jacob telling the truth when he said someone was coming to the island? Will we learn more about Hurley and Libby's connection? Will we see Vincent and Charlie again? Will we learn if Desmond was really on the plane?

The answer is "no" to the following: Will we get a conclusion to the story of Ben's love, Annie? Do the purple circles in Bender's mural mean anything? Did Juliet's ex-husband get killed by a smoke bus? Will there be a DVD release of the show in chronological order?

The answer is "maybe" to the following: Will the Hurley bird be explained? Will we see Walt again?

The answer is "no comment" to the following: Will we learn why women can't have babies on the island?

The one-word hint for what's left to come? "Water," according to Damon Lindelof.

Lost continues on ABC on Tuesday nights at 9pm.

'Lost' execs 'spoil' final episodes at TV Fest '10 [Entertainment Weekly]

A New Superman Director And A JLA Rumor As Well? [Superman]

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Would Warner Brothers really use the Man of Steel's precarious movie reboot as the launch pad for a new director? Maybe so, if said newbie happens to be the brother of The Dark Knight's Christopher Nolan.

IESB is reporting what they themselves are calling "unconfirmed (that is the key word here, boys and girls) rumors" that Jonah Nolan, Christopher's brother and co-writer of both Batman Begins and The Dark Knight (as well as being responsible for uncredited polishes on the Terminator Salvation script), will make his directorial debut on the new Superman movie. The site actually goes so far as to say that Jonah's debut is one of the main reasons behind Christopher's connection to the franchise which, if true, demonstrates a nice level of brotherly love.

The site also teases that, following Christopher Nolan's third Batmovie and Jonah's Superman, both creators will work on a Justice League movie that Christopher will direct, but somehow that sounds even more like fan wish-fulfillment than the Jonah/Superman rumor. Would Christopher Nolan really want to deal with the special effects and fanservice necessary for a JLA movie?

Big Plans For Superman, Batman & Co. [IESB]

Clifford Simaks Way Station A Place to Move On From [Blogging The Hugos]

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Aliens! Immortality! Intergalactic intrigue! Government spies! Armageddon on the horizon! The 1964 Hugo winner, Way Station by Clifford D. Simak, has all of these things and much, much less.

Last time I wrote that The Man in the High Castle marks where science fiction breaks away from its Golden Age, but of course it's not that simple. Clear demarcations are rare in real life, and both Simak and Way Station (originally published as Here Gather the Stars) seem much more closely tied to an earlier era than Philip K. Dick's work does.

It's a combination of things: There's the elegant but totally straightforward, almost empty writing style. (I don't mean "empty" in a bad way. But whereas with, say, Heinlein, Dick, or Roger Zelazny, an obvious voice comes through in almost all their work — boisterous, bleak, and wry, respectively — Simak as an author is invisible, which is how so many of the early authors read.) There's the Twilight Zone–like dialogue, cast, setting, and plot: The story is about Enoch Wallace, a Civil War veteran living in post-WWII rural Wisconsin who still looks like he's 30, because he's secretly the keeper of an intergalactic stopover point for traveling aliens. He's being watched by a government agent, his hillbilly neighbors are nervous of him, and worst of all, he's used extraterrestrial math to determine that humanity is likely on the verge of annihilating itself.

Most tellingly is how uncomplicatedly all of this — plus plot points involving a deaf-mute girl, a set of animated memories Enoch has created for company, a spiritual force that is empirically detectable, and interstellar political intrigues that threaten to shut down the way station — is handled. If The Man in the High Castle anticipates a world where solid answers are increasingly harder to come by, Way Station doesn't even begin to explore the innumerable ancillary questions it raises.

Some, the book explains away: Enoch's neighbors are suspicious of him but don't publicize the fact that the hermit in the old house has been young for over a century because they're private-minded, taciturn country folk, more distrustful of outsiders than their own weirdos. OK, I'll buy that. Other issues, though, like how the federal agent observing him is unhampered by red tape, to the point where he can reprocure alien property he's turned over to his bosses within twenty-four hours, no questions asked, are tougher to ignore. I mean, has life ever been that simple?

No, it hasn't. And though stories are by nature nowhere as complex as life, and shouldn't have to be — even the most true-to-life are escapist in that they let us look at our world from inside another — Way Station is harder to take seriously because it simultaneously hews to a such a plainspoken picture of the world while also cleaning up every loose end, including the impending apocalypse, so neatly. It's certainly not a bad book — and granted, I get to say this with the benefit of hindsight — but when one learns that it beat out Kurt Vonnegut's Cat's Cradle for the award, one can't help but think of Jethro Tull and Metallica.

I won't criticize the book for its technology, despite the fact that it involves printing things on metal plates, because I don't think authors are obligated to be futurists, much less accurate futurists. And actually, the alien's method of traveling to the way station is pretty nifty — predating Takeshi Kovacs as it does by almost forty years — although again, it suggests philosophical problems that seem like more interesting fodder than the ones the book tackles. Enoch's Danger Room–style basement is pretty sweet too, even if his visit to it feels like a random interlude.

I don't know. I think it must have been nice to be a science-fiction writer at the time when Way Station was published. Time was still moving relatively slowly (though I'm sure it didn't feel that way), and you could just write a story without worrying that you hadn't addressed every single implication and repercussion of the cool ideas you came up with. Or, I guess you don't have to worry about that now, but sometimes it feels to me like you do. That said, I think I like it better the way it is now. I don't ever regret having read a book, but I wouldn't recommend you run out and find this one. If humanity ever wants to be ready to join "the cofraternity of the stars," as Simak puts it so many times, then it's probably a good thing popular SF graduated to a more thoughtful, engaging level of storytelling.

"Blogging the Hugos" appears every other weekend. In the next installment: The Wanderer, by Fritz Leiber, from 1965.

Josh Wimmer is a freelance writer in Madison, WI. He can usually be found here.

Will KickAss Kill Superhero Movies? [Rant]

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

With Kick-Ass heading up the forefront of a new "What if superheroes existed in the real world?" trend, it may be time to wonder if this is a sign that superheroes are finally on their way out of mainstream culture.

The prevalence of superheroes in mainstream pop culture always seems to go in a cycle (and normally one led by Batman); first we get the tentative, nervous beginnings (Tim Burton's Batman, for example, which was pretty much a stylish action movie that just happened to feature a man dressed as Batman and a villain in white facepaint) before the fad gets bolder and more openly superheroic, outlandish and ridiculous (From X-Men's leather jumpsuits to Spider-Man's garish red-and-blue and, later, Iron Man's glowing, shiny armor, in the current era) and then starts collapsing under the weight of its own success (Watchmen, anyone?). By that point, it starts being visited by people who want to deconstruct it and add their own ideas, their own takes on the genre and everything goes to shit.

Kick-Ass feels like the beginning of the end, for me, but it's not alone; upcoming TV pilots like No Ordinary Family and The Cape are other high-profile examples of the move away from superpowered spectacle and towards a more mundane take on superheroes that brings them down to our level. For all its faults, something like Heroes (or other attempts at deconstruction, like Hancock or, worse, My Super Ex-Girlfriend) seemed to want to keep the scale of storytelling epic - destruction was widespread, if limited by budget, and stories had an ambition that was often let down by execution. But Kick-Ass et al are different; their entire point isn't just "What if superheroes had emotions like we do?" (Arguably Heroes' main conceit, right there in front of "Can we find something for everyone to do without actually doing anything new with the characters this year?"), but literally "What if superheroes were just like us? And could bleed and screw up and be as much of a mess as us?" Taking, if you like, one of the core questions behind Watchmen but leaving behind the imagination and ambition that addressed all the other genre conventions along with the humanity of its heroes.

Stripping not only the "heroes" but also the "super" from the genre feels, to me, as if culture is finally tiring of this latest spate of superhero worship; maybe it's a reaction to the superhero overkill of summer 2008 (and the foreknowledge of more to come from both DC Entertainment and Marvel/Disney in years to come), or just boredom with a formula that's become overfamiliar by now. It's taking apart the formula until there's almost nothing left, and then prodding what's there to see what thrills can be had. Such things are nothing new for comic fans, who've been experiencing this kind of cycle themselves on repeat for the last twenty-plus years; Marvel are at the end of a period of doing a softer version of that very same thing, after all, but whereas Dark Reign leads into a new Heroic Age of optimism, bright new Avengers and rainbow bridges (Metaphorically, at least; I have no idea whether that Thor standby will return by the end of Siege), that's down to a necessity than mainstream culture doesn't feel: Comics, Marvel in particular, have to keep pumping out superhero stories no matter how tired they may feel about the formula, because that's what the market is based around. Movies and television, luckily, have no such compulsion, and can let the genre rest and recuperate after its been taken apart.

That isn't to say that Kick-Ass won't be a massive hit; the buzz already suggests that it could be one of the movies that defines the summer, but it'll also skew the superhero movies that follow, drawing attention to their more formulaic moments and poking fun at the lack of self-conscious humor whenever they're played straight (Iron Man 2, already approaching self-parody in its trailer, is probably safe from this, but what about Thor? Or Captain America?) and potentially robbing the suspension of disbelief necessary to believe a man can fly. After seeing a genre's weak points exposed, will audiences really be excited to watch capes and costumes save the world non-stop for summers to come?

This Just In Tour Dates Announced for GLEE LIVE! IN CONCERT!

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Good News: FOX has announced the Tour Dates for GLEE LIVE! IN CONCERT! Bad News: For everyone who doesn’t live in New York, Los Angeles, Phoenix and Chicago. Details direct from FOX after the jump.

In an unprecedented live event, Twentieth Century Fox Television and “Glee” co-creator Ryan Murphy are bringing the hit television show to concert stages this spring.

Beginning Wednesday, May 18 at the Dodge Theatre in Phoenix, Arizona, “Glee” stars Lea Michele (Rachel), Cory Monteith (Finn), Amber Riley (Mercedes), Chris Colfer (Kurt), Kevin McHale (Artie), Jenna Ushkowitz (Tina), Mark Salling (Puck), Dianna Agron (Quinn), Naya Rivera (Santana), Heather Morris (Brittany), Harry Shum, Jr. (Mike) and Dijon Talton (Matt) will perform in a singing and dancing celebration of the Golden Globe Award winning show.

The four-city exclusive engagement, “Glee Live! In Concert!,” is a unique concert experience conceived by Murphy that will include live performances of some of the show’s most memorable musical numbers including its anthem “Don’t Stop Believin,” fan favorites “Somebody To Love” and “Jump” and hits “Don’t Rain on My Parade” and “Sweet Caroline.”

“The response of the fans to our little show has been so immediate and so gratifying, we wanted to get out and thank them live and in person,” commented Murphy. “And what show lends itself more to a concert than ‘Glee?’ We can’t wait to take this show on the road and the actors couldn’t be more excited to perform live for audiences in these four cities.”

“This has been such an extraordinary year for ‘Glee’ and I can’t think of a better way to finish up the first season than performing live on stage with the cast,” commented Michele, a Broadway veteran. Added Monteith, “This show has changed my life in so many ways. If you had told me a year ago that I’d be performing classic rock songs in concert theaters around the country, I would never have believed you. We are psyched!”

2010 Glee Live! In Concert! dates:
May 18 Phoenix, AZ Dodge Theatre
May 20 Los Angeles, CA Gibson Amphitheatre
May 21 Los Angeles, CA Gibson Amphitheatre
May 25 Chicago, IL Rosemont Theatre
May 26 Chicago, IL Rosemont Theatre
May 28 New York City, NY Radio City Music Hall
May 29 New York City, NY Radio City Music Hall

Select tickets will be available to American Express cardholders in an exclusive pre-sale beginning March 5; tickets go on sale to the general public Friday, March 12 at 10 a.m. for the concert in Phoenix, and Saturday, March 13 at 9:00 AM for the concerts in N.Y.C. and 10:00 AM for L.A. and Chicago. Tickets will be available via www.ticketmaster.com or by phone at (800) 745-3000 or at any Ticketmaster Outlet. Tickets will be available at the Dodge Theatre, Gibson Amphitheater and Rosemont Horizon Theatre box offices as well. Ticket prices range from $89.50-$39.50. “Glee Live! In Concert!” has also teamed with I Love All Access to provide a variety of fan ticket packages for the show, including premium seats, parties and more. For more information, please visit “Glee” at www.gleetour2010.com

One Sentence Review THE MARRIAGE REF

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Guest-judge Alec Baldwin summed this mess up best when he said of NBC’s unfunny, mean-spirited, Olympic-ceremony-interrupting bomb, “I think we’re wasting a lot of valuable network time here.”

March TV 2010 Download Print and Keep Track of All of Your Favorite New and Returning Shows

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

So Five Minutes Ago: The Olympics. Out: February. In: March, and with it, a slew of very exciting new (PARENTHOOD, THE PACIFIC, JUSTIFIED) and returning favorites (90201, GOSSIP GIRL, SCRUBS). All of which you can easily keep track of thanks to our newly redesigned March TV Calendar. Available at the following links as both a High Quality PDF or JPG.

Watch PVR Pass Sunday February 28 2010

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Today?s TV Addict Top 5 Reasons Why Last Night?s SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE Was Actually Worth Staying Up For!

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

In a surprisingly funny take on CBS’ hit new reality series UNDERCOVER BOSS, SNL spoofed the formula with CELEBRITY UNDERCOVER BOSS. Which saw company CEO’s like Steve Jobs, Richard Branson, the Olsen Twins and Martha Stewart attempt to go incognito working entry-level jobs at their own companies.

While we’re the first to admit to knowing virtually nothing about the political scandal this week that forced Governor of New York David Paterson to end his campaign for re-election — we do know that unlike Bobby Moynihan’s Weekend Update Commentary that took YouTube to task for buffering in a sketch that felt like it belonged in 2005 — Fred Armisen’s always hilarious Paterson impersonation will be missed.

Meanwhile, Seth Meyers campaign to be Jon Stewart’s heir apparent continued with some smart and quipy one-liners like this one, “Gatorade this week officially dropped Tiger Woods as their spokesperson after realizing that his thirst would never be quenched.”

Just how funny (and uncharacteristically snarky) was SNL’s cold-open that had the show tearing apart the ridiculous, albeit well-intentioned sequel to the iconic “We Are The World” celebrity by celebrity (Justin Bieber, Really?). So much so that we’re willing to forgive the not-so-pleasant attempt by Jason Sudeikis to impersonate Adam Lambert that has forever been etched in our memory.

Saving this week’s Andy Samberg digital short, a “Flags of the World” music video, from digital dud status were two blink-and-you’ll miss references to LOST and Betty White. Who caught them?

It?s Grahamtastic! The TV Addict Week in Review

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Inspired by Movieline and in anticipation of the soon-to-be-released Apple iPad that will more than likely signal the beginning of the end for traditional print media, this TV Addict thought it might be fun to start highlighting a look back on the week in television that was in nostalgic magazine form (And yes, we realize we may have a just little too much free time on our hands!)

This week on theTVaddict.com shared 5 reasons why we’re looking forward to the Olympic closing ceremony, posted some spoilerific photos of Sheldon from an upcoming episode of THE BIG BANG THEORY, shamelessly gave away BURN NOTICE Seasons 1 & 2 on DVD if you became our Faceboook friend, teased Kathy Griffin’s upcoming guest appearance on LAW & ORDER: SVU, offered up a LOST spin-off we’d like to see, and interviewed PARENTHOOD’s Erika Christensen and GLEE’s Corey Monteith.

Watch PVR Pass Monday March 1 2010

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Twitter Users Save NBC!

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

After spending 30 minutes mocking NBC’s God-awful THE MARRIAGE REF last night, Twitter users took pity upon the network by banding together in an attempt to help it come up with something… well, watchable. The idea was spearheaded by @DustyTrice, who kicked things off with a tweet saying, “NBC will greenlight any show pitched. We need to develop a show for @NBC. Right now. On Twitter.” What followed was a slew of suggestions, some of which you can see after the jump.

@mklprc: OCD CATS: A trio of cats with obsessive-compulsive disorder hire themselves out as private investigators.

@howrudeareyou THE REAL HOUSEWIVES OF BEAVER FALLS, PENNSYLVANIA

@dustytrice MARRY THIS STRANGER with host Mike Tyson

@Maikeru48 JOANIE DIVORCES CHACHI

@DEKMinn NAME THAT ROTTING VEGETABLE!

@davesund Kanye West hosts IMMA LET YOU FINISH.

@buddawiggi SURVIVOR: SOUTH DETROIT

@davincidad HIT THEM WITH A STICK: Participants get to hit people who annoy them with a stick.

@JamRockStar LAW & ORDER: MALL COP

@MikeRylander A struggling network fires one of their most popular employees (Conan O’Brien). Wackiness (and bankruptcy) ensues.

TV Ratings Sunday February 28 1010 NBC?s Olympic Coverage goes out on Top

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Source: MediaWeek, Ratings: in millions
Time	Network	Show	Rating	18-49
8PM	NBC	Winter Olympics 2010	22.09	5.7/5
	CBS	Amazing Race 16	10.30	3.1/8
	ABC	Extreme Makeover: HE	6.40	1.8/5
	FOX	The Simpsons (R)	5.41	2.4/6
8:30PM	FOX	Cleveland Show (R)	5.08	2.3/6
9PM	NBC	Winter Olympics 2010	21.86	5.6/13
	CBS	Undercover Boss	13.65	4.5/11
	ABC	Desperate Housewives	10.91	3.6/9
	FOX	Family Guy (R)	5.81	2.8/7
9:30PM	FOX	American Dad (R)	4.73	2.2/5
10PM	NBC	Winter Olympics 2010	19.44	5.3/14
	CBS	Cold Case	9.89	2.5/6
	ABC	Brothers & Sisters	8.16	2.7/7
10:30PM	NBC	The Marriage Ref (Premiere)	14.47	4.8/13

AMERICAN IDOL The Top 20 By the Numbers

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Your Top 20 Ranked by Social Media Popularity

While actual talent, singing ability and stage presence may play a small part in who will be named your next American Idol, the not-so-ugly-fact of the matter is that the success and/or failure of a contestant on America’s most-watched singing competition very often boils down to nothing more than popularity. Like High School, it’s not what, but rather who and how many people (on facebook!) you know. Which is why all season long theTVaddict.com will be posting a weekly mashup of the remaining contestants popularity on their official show-sanctioned twitter, facebook and myspace accounts in a new feature we like to call AMERICAN IDOL: By The Numbers.

Fun Facts about this week’s Top 20: By percentage, Lee Dewyze attracted the most new followers with an impressive 193%. Conversly, Todrick Hall after a fairly disappointing performance attracted the least new number of followers, adding a mere 48%. Casey James jumped from 10th to 4th place, while Aaron Kelly sunk to 7th from 5th. Meanwhile Andrew Garcia and John Park remain your front-runners, holding onto the first and second spots respectively.

Note: Numbers were calculated on 03/01/10 at 9:36AM (est)
name	facebook	myspace	twitter	total	last week
1. Andrew Garcia	9719	281	11365	21365	1
2. John Park	8767	114	2745	11626	2
3. Tim Urban	7799	299	2284	10382	4
4. Casey James	5955	379	2875	9209	10
5. Lee Dewyze	6170	391	1771	8332	13
6. Lacy Brown	5477	114	2338	7929	6
7. Aaron Kelly	5097	704	2042	7843	5
8. Katie Stevens	4540	232	2338	7110	7
9. Crystal Bowersoz	4336	492	2163	6991	8
10. Alex Lambert	4558	192	1698	6448	11
11. Siobhan Magnus	4703	186	1193	6082	15
12. Didi Benami	2852	202	2773	5827	9
13. Katelyn Epperly	2991	181	1339	4551	17
14. Jermaine Sellers	2684	164	1123	3971	18
15. Todrick Hall	1745	202	1602	3549	16
16. Lilly Scott	1211	126	1635	2972	20
17. Michael Lynche	1257	93	1541	2891	19
18. Haeley Vaughn	1228	143	1173	2544	21
19. Paige Miles	1589	80	710	2379	22
20. Michelle Delamor	1431	138	794	2363	24
~~Ashley Rodriguez~~	XXX	XXX	XXX	XXX	XXX
~~Janell Wheeler~~	XXX	XXX	XXX	XXX	XXX
~~Joe Muñoz~~	XXX	XXX	XXX	XXX	XXX
~~Tyler Grady~~	XXX	XXX	XXX	XXX	XXX

Film on TV March 17

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Contempt, playing on TCM late Sunday/early Monday

Of the new ones this week, I’m most excited about catching Days of Heaven myself (Monday on TCM), since it’s part of the Easy Riders, Raging Bulls marathon. Don’t know if I’ll watch it right away, though; I’m trying to keep in somewhat chronological order watching those. Other notable newly features ones: West Side Story and Rebel Without a Cause on Tuesday, Alien on Wednesday (I’m long overdue a rewatch on that one), All the President’s Men on Thursday, and Jean-Luc Godard’s Contempt late Sunday/early Monday.

Monday, March 1

8:30am – IFC – American Splendor
Harvey Pekar is one of the more idiosyncratic graphic novelists there is (”comic book” doesn’t quite cover his very adult, neurotic art), and Paul Giamatti brings him to life perfectly.
2003 USA. Directors: Shari Springer Berman & Robert Pulcini. Starring: Paul Giamatti, Hope Davis.
(repeats at 3:30pm)

10:15pm – TCM – Days of Heaven
Terrence Malick has made his reputation on only four films; this is his second, some five years after debut Badlands. I haven’t watched it yet, but it’s on the Easy Riders, Raging Bulls Marathon list, so I will be before long – and judging by the screencaps I’ve already seen, I’m expecting to love it.
1978 USA. Director: Terrence Malick. Starring: Richard Gere, Brooke Adams, Sam Shepard.
Newly Featured!

Tuesday, March 2

9:30am – TCM – The Maltese Falcon
Humphrey Bogart inhabits the role of Dashiell Hammett’s private eye Sam Spade, creating one of the definitive on-screen hard-boiled detective (vying only with Bogart’s Philip Marlowe in The Big Sleep, really). Not mention setting the early benchmark for noir films.
1941 USA. Director: John Huston. Starring: Humphrey Bogart, Mary Astor, Peter Lorre, Sydney Greenstreet, Elisha Cook Jr, Walter Huston.
Must See

10:15am – IFC – Crimes and Misdemeanors
When Martin Landau’s long-time mistress threatens to expose their affair unless he marries her, he’s faced with the decision to let her ruin his life and career or have her murdered. In a tangentially and thematically-related story, Woody Allen is a documentary filmmaker forced into making a profile of a successful TV producer rather than the socially-conscious films he wants to make. One of Allen’s most thoughtful and philosophically astute films – there are few answers here, but the questions will stay in your mind forever.
1989 USA. Director: Woody Allen. Starring: Woody Allen, Alan Alda, Martin Landau, Anjelica Huston, Claire Bloom, Joanna Gleason.
Must See
(repeats at 3:45pm)

11:00am – Sundance – Metropolitan
If Jane Austen made a movie in 1990 and set it among entitled Manhattan socialites, this would be it. The film follows a group of such entitled teens from party to party, focusing especially on the one outsider, a boy from the blue-collar class who has to rent a tux and pretend he likes to walk to avoid letting his new friends know he has to take the bus home. Though they find out soon enough, they keep him around because his intellectual nattering amuses them. In fact, it’s quite amazing that this film is interesting at all, given the amount of pseudo-intellectual nattering that goes on, from all the characters. But from start to finish, it’s both entertaining and an incisive look at the American class structure.
1990 USA. Director: Whit Stillman. Starring: Edward Clements, Chris Eigeman, Carolyn Farina, Taylor Nichols, Dylan Hundley.

4:00pm – TCM – Royal Wedding
This isn’t one of the all-time great Fred Astaire musicals, but it’s quite charming in its small way, and has the distinction of including the Fred’s “dancing on the ceiling” extravaganza, as well as a few surprisingly competent dance numbers from Fred and not-dancer Jane Powell. Oh, and Fred’s love interest is Sarah Churchill, Winston Churchill’s daughter, which is interesting (Powell plays his sister).
1951 USA. Director: Stanley Donen. Starring: Fred Astaire, Jane Powell, Sarah Churchill, Peter Lawford.

6:00pm – TCM – West Side Story
I unabashedly love musicals, Shakespeare, and stylized choreography. Hence, I love West Side Story. I wish Richard Beymer and Natalie Wood were a little more interesting as the leads, but the supporting cast is electrifying enough that it doesn’t much matter, especially with Bernstein and Sondheim music and Jerome Robbins choreography.
1961 USA. Director: Richard Wise & Jerome Robbins. Starring: Natalie Wood, Richard Beymer, Russ Tamblyn, George Chakiris, Rita Moreno.
Must See
Newly Featured!

11:00pm – TCM – Rebel Without a Cause
Nicholas Ray’s best-known movie (though not, I’d argue, his best), likely because it’s one of James Dean’s three films. Dean is a rebellious teen, hanging out with the wrong crowd, whose parents don’t understand him. It all seems a little overwrought these days, but there’s an intensity to Dean and the film that manages to make it still relatable.
1955 USA. Director: Nicholas Ray. Starring: James Dean, Natalie Wood, Sal Mineo.
Newly Featured!

Wednesday, March 3

11:30am – TCM – Adam’s Rib
Spencer Tracy and Katharine Hepburn take on the battle of the sexes as married lawyers on opposite sides of an assault case involving gender politics. It’s a great movie in dialogue and acting, and still interesting for the 1949 view of women struggling for even basic equality. Some of its approach to gender may be a bit strange today, but…that’s why it’s interesting.
1949 USA. Director: George Cukor. Starring: Spencer Tracy, Katharine Hepburn, Judy Holliday, Tom Ewell, Jean Hagen, Gig Young

1:30pm – TCM – The Asphalt Jungle
The Asphalt Jungle was really MGM’s first foray into noirish crime films. Being MGM, it’s more polished and, to me, less interesting than the crime dramas that Warner Bros. and the smaller studios were putting out, but hey. It’s still pretty good. And has a really young Marilyn Monroe.
1950 USA. Director: John Huston. Starring: Sterling Hayden, Louis Calhern, Jean Hagen, James Whitmore, Sam Jaffe.

3:30pm – TCM – Oklahoma!
I can’t begin to guess how many times I watched Oklahoma! growing up, but it’s well into double-digits. It’s a nothing story, about minor conflicts between farmers and cowboys, a couple of young lovers, and the obsessive farmhand who wants the girl for himself. It’s the way the music and dancing is integrated that’s wonderful (and groundbreaking in the 1943 play the film is based on).
1955 USA. Director: Fred Zinnemann. Starring: Gordon MacRae, Shirley Jones, Rod Steiger, Gloria Grahame, Gene Nelson, Eddie Albert, Charlotte Greenwood, James Whitmore.

9:45pm – IFC – Volver
Pedro Almodóvar deftly straddles the line between drama and comedy in one of his more accessible films. Two sisters return to their home at the death of their aunt, only to find their mother’s ghost – or is it a ghost? And as always in Almodóvar’s films, there are related subplots aplenty. Penélope Cruz is incredible as the younger, fierier sister – she’s never been more moving than in her passionate rendition of the title song, nor funnier than when calmly cleaning up a murder scene.
2006 Spain. Director: Pedro Almodóvar. Starring: Penélope Cruz, Carmen Maura, Lola Dueñas, Blanco Portillo, Yohana Cobo
Must See

10:15pm – TCM – Alien
Often considered one of the best sci-fi/horror creature features of all time (or just behind its sequel Aliens). Sigourney Weaver gets an iconic role as ass-kicking astronaut Ripley.
1979 USA. Director: Ridley Scott. Starring: Sigourney Weaver, Tom Skerritt, Veronica Cartwright, Harry Dean Stanton, Ian Holm, John Hurt.
Newly Featured!

Thursday, March 4

6:00am – TCM – Four Daughters
Something of a high-B-level programmer, Four Daughters tells the fairly routine story of four sisters and their love interests; there’s more to it than meets the eye, though, and starlet Priscilla Lane (notably of Arsenic and Old Lace) carries it well with her two sisters Lola and Rosemary. It’s interesting to contrast with its 1954 musical remake Young at Heart, which boasts the greater star power of Doris Day and Frank Sinatra. They’re virtually identical in script, but this one strikes a more sincere note with me.
1938 USA. Director: Michael Curtiz. Starring: Priscilla Lane, Claude Rains, John Garfield.

5:30pm – TCM -The Postman Always Rings Twice
Sizzling adaptation of James M. Cain’s classic pulp novel has Lana Turner as the unhappy wife of a middle-of-nowhere gas station owner and John Garfield as the drifter who drops in and plots her husband’s demise with her. Skip the 1982 remake, from what I’ve heard, but if you’re feeling adventurous, check out Luchino Visconti’s Ossession, a 1943 Italian adaptation of the novel widely considered to be a forerunner of the Italian Neo-Realist movement.
1946 USA. Director: Tay Garnett. Starring: Lana Turner, John Garfield, Cecil Kellaway, Hume Cronyn.

8:00pm – Sundance – A Prairie Home Companion
I’ve been taken to task for ignoring Robert Altman films in these write-ups, and I’ll confess that’s true due to my woeful ignorance of Altman films. Though I’m working to rectify this blind spot, I just haven’t seen that many of his films, including this one, the last one he made before he died.
2006 USA. Director: Robert Altman. Starring: Woody Harrelson, Meryl Streep, Kevin Kline, Lindsay Lohan, Virginia Madsen, John C. Reilly, Maya Rudolph, Lily Tomlin.
Newly Featured!
(repeats at 4:10am on the 5th)

9:00pm – TCM – To Have and Have Not
It’s said that this film came about because Howard Hawks bet Earnest Hemingway that he (Hawks) could make a good film out of Hemingway’s worst book. Of course, to do that, Hawks ended up basically changing the story entirely, but hey. It’s the thought that counts. Mostly notable for being Lauren Bacall’s first film, the one where she met Humphrey Bogart, and the one that spawned the immortal “you know how to whistle, don’t you, Steve” bit of dialogue. That one scene? Worth the whole film.
1944 USA. Director: Howard Hawks. Starring: Humphrey Bogart, Lauren Bacall, Walter Brennan.

11:00pm – TCM – All the President’s Men
The Nixon and Watergate scandal is presented as a mystery almost, from the point of view of Woodward and Bernstein, the rookie Washington Post investigative reporters who broke the story. The film unfolds like a very good procedural, balancing the fact-finding itself with the roadblocks Woodward has to overcome at the paper because of his youth and inexperience. Not a showy film, but a really well-made one with excellent performances from Redford and Hoffman.
1976 USA. Director: Alan J. Pakula. Starring: Robert Redford, Dustin Hoffman, Jack Warden, Martin Balsam, Hal Holbrook.
Newly Featured!

1:30am (5th) – Sundance – The Death of Mr. Lazrescu
One of the major films in Romania’s current cinematic resurgence – emphasis on realism, slow pacing, and in this case, the failures of the Romanian health care system, which shunts poor Mr. Lazarescu around from hospital to hospital as he gets sicker and sicker. I wasn’t as captivated by this as I was by 4 Months, 3 Weeks, and 2 Days by a longshot, but if you’re interested in Romanian film, you oughta see it. If you didn’t like 4 Months, though, you almost certainly won’t like this.
2005 Romania. Director: Cristi Puiu. Starring: Ion Fiscuteanu, Doru Ana, Monica Barladeanu, Doru Boguta.

Friday, March 5

7:00am – IFC – The Station Agent
One of the most pleasant surprises (for me, anyway) of 2003. Peter Dinklage moves into a train depot to indulge his love for trains and stay away from people, only to find himself befriended by a loquacious Cuban hot-dog stand keeper and an emotionally delicate Patricia Clarkson. A quiet but richly rewarding film.
2003 USA. Director: Thomas McCarthy. Starring: Peter Dinklage, Patricia Clarkson, Bobby Cannavale.
(repeats at 12:30pm)

8:35am – IFC – Maria Full of Grace
Once in a while a film comes out of nowhere and floors me – this quiet little film about a group of South American women who agree to smuggle drugs into the United States by swallowing packets of cocaine did just that. Everything in the film is perfectly balanced, no element overwhelms anything else, and it all comes together with great empathy, but without sentimentality.
2004 USA. Director: Joshua Marston. Starring: Catalina Sandino Moreno, Virginia Ariza, Yenny Paola Vega.
(repeats at 2:00pm)

Saturday, March 6

8:30am – TCM – The Ladykillers
One of the most delightful of the Ealing comedies, with Alec Guinness leading a bunch of crooks (including a young Peter Sellers) whose bankrobbing plans get flustered by an unlikely old lady.
1955 UK. Director: Alexander Mackendrick. Starring: Alec Guinness, Cecil Parker, Herbert Lom, Peter Sellers.
Must See

1:30pm – IFC – My Life as a Dog
Lasse Hallstrom gives us this simple but effective coming-of-age story, focusing on the every day life of a young boy as he’s sent to live in a provincial village after acting out at home.
1985 Sweden. Director: Lasse Hallstrom. Starring: Anton Glanzelius, Tomas von Brömssen, Anki Lidén, Melinda Kinnaman.
(repeats at 5:00am on the 7th)

5:30pm – TCM – On the Beach
After nuclear war, most of humanity is destroyed; a small outpost in Australia survives, but not for long. See David’s longer take here;.
1959 USA. Director: Stanley Kramer. Starring: Gregory Peck, Ava Gardner, Fred Astaire.

8:00pm – TCM – A Streetcar Named Desire
A Streetcar Named Desire won Vivien Leigh her second Oscar as fading Southern belle Blanche DuBois, and made a star out of Marlon Brando. It’s also one of the films I’m most embarrassed to say I’ve never seen. I even have it on DVD somewhere! Someday, I will get to it.
1951 USA. Director: Elia Kazan. Starring: Marlon Brando, Vivien Leigh, Kim Stanley, Karl Malden.

10:00pm – Sundance – Nights of Cabiria
Nights of Cabiria, one of the films Federico Fellini made during his sorta-neo-realist phase, casts Masina as a woman of the night, following her around almost non-committally, yet with a lot of care and heart. And Masina is simply amazing in everything she does – not classically beautiful, but somehow incredibly engaging for every second she’s onscreen.
1957 Italy. Director: Federico Fellini. Starring: Giulietta Masina, François Périer, Franca Marzi.
Must See
(repeats at 4:20am on the 7th)

2:30am (7th) – TCM – Blackboard Jungle
Glenn Ford is the teacher who takes on rowdy inner-city kids in one of the earlier “heroic teacher” films. A young Sidney Poitier is one of the students, and a scene in which a record of “Rock Around the Clock” is played is reputed to be the first time rock n’ roll appeared in a film.
1955 USA. Director: Richard Brooks. Starring: Glenn Ford, Anne Francis, Louis Calhern, Sidney Poitier.

4:15am (7th) – TCM – The Killers (1946)
Burt Lancaster made his film debut in this excellent noir, an expansion of an Ernest Hemingway short story. Lancaster is a quiet gas station attendant killed in the opening of the film by two hitmen – the events that lead up to his death (involving, among other things, a classic femme fatale played by Ava Gardner) are told in flashback throughout the rest of the film.
1946 USA. Director: Robert Siodmak. Starring: Burt Lancaster, Ava Gardner, Edmond O’Brien, Albert Dekker, Sam Levene.

Sunday, March 7

10:15pm – TCM – The Big Knife
Clifford Odets’ searing play about his hatred of Hollywood comes to the screen, with Jack Palance mugging as a frustrated actor who wants out of his contract, but can’t get out because the studio is blackmailing him. Between Odets’ overly poetic dialogue, director Robert Aldrich’s melodramatic style, and Palance’s scenery-chewing, this is a camptastic good time.
1955 USA. Director: Robert Aldrich. Starring: Jack Palance, Ida Lupino, Wendell Corey, Jean Hagen, Rod Steiger, Shelley Winters.

2:00am (8th) – TCM – Contempt
One of Jean-Luc Godard’s most consciously self-reflexive films, and that is saying a lot for someone who uses self-reflexivity the way most people use water. It took me longer to warm to this film than most of Godard’s (perhaps because of seeing it earlier than some of his lighter fare), but there’s a lot here to chew on, and a lot to enjoy, from the comments on his own relationship with Anna Karina to the foibles of filmmaking to the misunderstandings of translation.
1963 France. Director: Jean-Luc Godard. Starring: Michel Piccoli, Brigitte Bardot, Jack Palance, Fritz Lang.
Must See
Newly Featured!

4:00am (8th) – TCM – The Bad and the Beautiful
Vincente Minnelli directs Kirk Douglas, Lana Turner, Dick Powell, and Gloria Grahame in one of the best dark-side-of-Hollywood noirish films this side of Sunset Boulevard.
1952 USA. Director: Vincente Minnelli. Starring: Kirk Douglas, Lana Turner, Dick Powell, Gloria Grahame.

White Ribbon Is Best Looking Film of the Year

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

-Associated Press

LOS ANGELES – The German drama The White Ribbon has taken top honors from the American Society of Cinematographers.

The group’s feature-film award Saturday night went to cinematographer Christian Berger for The White Ribbon, director Michael Haneke’s study of a small German town beset by mysterious violence on the eve of World War I.

The White Ribbon won out over a field that included Avatar, The Hurt Locker and Inglourious Basterds. At the Academy Awards on March 7, The White Ribbon is competing against those same three films plus Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince.

Television cinematography prizes went to Eagle Egilsson for an episode of “Dark Blue” and Alar Kivilo for the movie “Taking Chance.”

Bookmarks for Feb 2628th

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Hollywood hears Roar of Women – Commercial Performance Power of Actresses has Never been Stronger
“Traditionally, female roles in Hollywood fall into one of three categories: the mother, the ingénue and the quirky (usually unlucky-in-love) best friend or sidekick. Not this year. What we were served in 2009 were some real characters, storylines and performances we could really sink our teeth into.”
Variety Will Kill a Bad Review of Your ‘Mediocre’ Movie For Just $400,000
“Last month, Variety panned a thriller called Iron Cross. But the review has been disappeared from Variety’s web site, which probably has something to do with the $400,000 Iron Cross’ producers paid to Variety for an awards campaign.”
David Lynch-ified Movie Trailers
Well, actually David Lynch had indeed a shot at Return (Revenge) of the Jedi, but passed on it. Want to see what the trailer at least for this, as well as Friday The Thirteenth (Part 5), A Goofy Movie and more would look like? Lynch cliches abound.
The Repo Men One Sheet Collection
Whether or not you feel that the filmmakers are simply re-making Repo! The Genetic Opera with a more traditional style, or there should be a lawsuit, these handsome one-sheets are nifty!
The Curious Case of Tilda Swinton
“Below is a guided tour of Tilda’s career in movie posters. Despite her striking beauty she hasn’t been particularly well served by poster designers (fashion designers, on the other hand, have a field day with her), which makes the I Am Love posters all the more notable. Do make sure to scroll all the way down though for the superb poster for the Beijing installment of her film festival: The Scottish Cinema of Dreams in China. Pure Tilda.”
Roger Ebert regains his power of Speech from DVD Commentary Tracks
“Before I lost my voice due to cancer-related surgery, I’d recorded commentary tracks for some movies on DVD: “Citizen Kane,” “Casablanca,” “Floating Weeds,” “Dark City” and, ah, “Beyond the Valley of the Dolls.” These tracks had been recorded separately from the movies, so they could be edited to fit scenes. They might be “pure” audio. I asked two friends of mine, Ronnie Sass of Warner Bros. and Kim Hendrickson of the Criterion Collection, if they still had the original digital recordings. They rummaged in warehouses and found they did.”

You can now take a look at RowThree’s bookmarks at any time of your choosing simply by clicking the “delicious” button in the upper right of the page. It looks remarkably similar to this:

Portuguese Auteur Pedro Costa Lands at Criterion

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

It was only a matter of time before the world noticed that there was a master filmmaker in Pedro Costa. The Portuguese director has spent the last 20 years building a distinguished career or films which are timeless, endlessly depressing but also shine a light on the immigrant story, not only in Portugal but the world over. Sadly, a whole lot of folks never quite managed to grasp his art.

Costa’s films are deliberately paced, largely unscripted and if I had to compare them to anything, it would be like walking through a beautiful nightmare. These are endlessly sad stories but the settings and the way they’re told is haunting and many of the images are likely to stay with you for months if not years.

Booed at Cannes and overlooked at many a festival (his appearance at VIFF a few years ago was a disappointment as barely ¼ of the crowd stayed through the entire film), it looks like Costa has finally found some critical attention (I’m willing to bet his 2006 appearance in Cahiers du cinéma’s top 10 may have had something to do with it).

The great people at Criterion have announced the release of Letters from Fontinhas: Three Films by Pedro Costa. Fontinhas refers to a now demolished “slum” on the outskirts of Lisbon. The three films included in the set, Ossos, In Vanda’s Room and Colossal Youth, are a lose trilogy of unrelated characters who happen to live in Fontinhas.

This is very exciting. Costas’ work has been notoriously difficult to acquire on DVD (aside from difficult to find and expensive imports). I can’t wait to get my little hands on this. Kudos to Criterion for shinning a light on another undiscovered master. Now, just waiting for that Oliveira box set.

A few trailers tucked under the seats.

In Vanda’s Room Trailer

Colossal Youth Trailer

Rank ?em Leonardo DiCaprio

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

With my recent re-fascination and enjoyment with flickchart (that now allows rankings of only actors or directors (had a good time ranking all my Soderbergh movies by the way) and also with all the recent Shutter Island talk around here, I’ve renewed my interest and respect for DiCaprio. He always, always puts on a good performance. Since I’ve seen just about everything in his body of work, here is how I see the quality of his films (not his performances) ranked in order from favorite to least favorite starting with the earliest work that I can remember seeing him in (Gilbert Grape)…

Titanic
The Departed
Shutter Island
Romeo and Juliet
What’s Eating Gilbert Grape
Gangs of New York
Revolutionary Road
The Aviator
Catch Me If You Can
The Basketball Diaries
Blood Diamond
The Quick and the Dead
The Man in the Iron Mask
Body of Lies
The Beach

NOT SEEN:
Marvin’s Room
Celebrity
Don’s Plum
Total Eclipse
The Foot Shooting Party

Easy Riders? McCabe Mrs Miller

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

****½ (4.5/5)

McCabe & Mrs. Miller is a film that didn’t grab me straight away – it’s muddy soundtrack (Altman was working ahead of the recording technology available at the time) and lack of obvious narrative took a bit of getting used to. Maybe it had been too long since I’d watched an Altman film though as once I settled into it and afterward let myself digest what I’d experienced the film more than grew on me. There are no bold stylistic flourishes (visually at least) and no gripping storyline, but it’s a film that you soak up and live in for two hours. The film’s setting, the town of Presbyterian Church, was constructed from scratch for the film (up in Canada), with period detail adhered to as often as possible, down to substituting nails for wooden pegs (according to a vintage documentary on my DVD). This, added to Altman’s trademark overlapping, largely improvised dialogue create a world within the picture that truly feels like a living, breathing place and it’s a place you don’t want to leave when the film reaches it’s bleak finale.

Spaghetti westerns had revolutionised the tired genre back in the 60’s, turning away from the polished all-American heroes of old and offering up dirty, violent anti-heroes. McCabe & Mrs. Miller deconstructs this even further, still offering a gritty vision (complete with the bodily functions you’d expect from a backwoods diet of beans and rice), but this time without the flashy cinematography (although it does look lovely) and without any real heroes at all. Warren Beatty and Julie Christie are clearly the leads, but McCabe (Beatty) is no gunslinger fighting for some higher cause and he’s not even good at running his gambling joint and whorehouse, which Mrs. Miller (Christie) brings up from a set of tents in the mud to the classiest bordello in the region. She’s no angel either, merely an opium smoking hooker who refuses to open up to her wannabe-suitor McCabe. The narrative reaches it’s turning point when business men from another town come to try and buy him out and neither character acts in an honourable fashion. McCabe fails to settle a deal, unwittingly signing his own death warrant and when Mrs. Miller explains this fact to him, rather than stand up for his rights, McCabe pathetically attempts to accept the original offer and Mrs. Miller does very little to help.

There is little more to the plot than that really, the film instead focuses on the subtly developing relationship between the title characters as well as charting the birth of an early American settlement. We watch Presbyterian Church grow from tents and timber to a fairly successful mining town whose inhabitants in the end work together to put out a fire in their place of worship whilst the town’s key founder falls victim to big business. The inevitable yet devastating denouement sticks a finger up to the American dream with the hard working little man left out in the cold against the dishonourable face of the first ‘corporations’. The love story you expect from the film’s title never really emerges either, instead McCabe and Miller’s relationship is a more interesting beast which never blossoms into a Hollywood romance and pretty much takes a back seat to the film’s cynical view of the birth of America. Some of the later scenes with the two alone are quietly heartbreaking though and give the film enough emotional weight to stop it feeling too icy.

When McCabe & Mrs. Miller does present a western staple, the gunfight, it does so with a brutality and realism that is common with the violence of it’s contemporaries. When a character is shot with what I can only describe as an elephant gun, we watch as his arm is ripped in two by the impact. More powerful though is a scene between a sadistic young gun-for-hire and a baby-faced cowboy wannabe, resulting in a disturbingly meaningless killing that shocks far more than any blood-soaked splatterfest. The climactic showdown is refreshingly believable too with McCabe resorting to cowardly tactics to try and turn the tables instead of facing enemies directly in a superhuman stand-off.

It all comes together to create a western that plays out like no other, yet has a real sense of time and place that feels genuine and draws you into this intoxicating slice of life. It presents the early American West as an unforgiving landscape where both the forces of nature and the emerging dangers of power and wealth make impossible enemies to the hopeful pioneers of the country.

Genie Award Nominees Revealed

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

The Genie Awards may not exactly be the Oscars but Canada’s awards to celebrate the best of Canadian films has been having a filed day the last few years. In the past, it’s always been difficult, and a little sad, to study the list only to find you’ve never heard of, never mind seen, a large portion of the films listed but last year the Genies unveiled a great list of films which really marked what 2009 could have in store.

The year has come and gone and a huge number of the films listed in this year’s awards are not only great, a few are down right spectacular. And that’s only for 2009. Some of the 2010 films have already appeared through festivals late in the year and are scheduled for release later this year and if the few I’ve seen are any indication, we’re in for a spectacular year in Canadian film.

Denis Villeneuve’s brilliant Polytechnique (review) leads the pack with 11 nominations while Bruce McDonald’s crowd pleasing Pontypool (review) walks away with three. But that’s just the top of the barrel because also included are Charles Officer’s gorgeous Nurse.Fighter.Boy, the French Canadian fantasy Babine, Marie-Hélène Cousineau and Madeline Ivalu’s Before Tomorrow, Kari Skogland’s 50 Dead Men Walking (review) and even love for the crimminaly overlooked coming of age tale Victoria Day. All in all, a spectacular year.

The Genies will be handed out in Toronto on April 12th in a show hosted by the great Gordon Pinsent and Tatiana Maslany.

BEST MOTION PICTURE / MEILLEUR FILM
3 SAISONS – Maude Bouchard, Jim Donovan, Sandy Martinez, Bruno Rosato
BEFORE TOMORROW – Stéphane Rituit
FIFTY DEAD MEN WALKING – Shawn Williamson, Stephen Hegyes, Peter La Terriere, Kari Skogland
NURSE.FIGHTER.BOY – Ingrid Veninger
POLYTECHNIQUE – Maxime Rémillard, Don Carmody

ACHIEVEMENT IN DIRECTION / MEILLEURE RÉALISATION
MARIE-HÉLÈNE COUSINEAU, MADELINE PIUJUQ IVALU – Before Tomorrow
KARI SKOGLAND – Fifty Dead Men Walking
CHARLES OFFICER – NURSE.FIGHTER.BOY
DENIS VILLENEUVE – Polytechnique
BRUCE MCDONALD – Pontypool

ORIGINAL SCREENPLAY / MEILLEUR SCÉNARIO
ATOM EGOYAN – Adoration
ÉMILE GAUDREAULT, IAN LAUZON – De père en flic / Father and Guns
CHARLES OFFICER, INGRID VENINGER – NURSE.FIGHTER.BOY
JACQUES DAVIDTS – Polytechnique
DAVID BEZMOZGIS – Victoria Day

ADAPTED SCREENPLAY / MEILLEURE ADAPTATION
MARIE-HÉLÈNE COUSINEAU, SUSAN AVINGAQ, MADELINE PIUJUQ IVALU – Before Tomorrow
KARI SKOGLAND – Fifty Dead Men Walking
TONY BURGESS – Pontypool

PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTOR IN A LEADING ROLE / INTERPRÉTATION MASCULINE DANS UN PREMIER RÔLE
JEAN-CARL BOUCHER – 1981
PAUL DYLAN IVALU – Before Tomorrow
JOSHUA JACKSON – One Week
CLARK JOHNSON – NURSE.FIGHTER.BOY
STEPHEN MCHATTIE – Pontypool

PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTRESS IN A LEADING ROLE / INTERPRÉTATION FÉMININE DANS UN PREMIER RÔLE
MADELINE PIUJUQ IVALU – Before Tomorrow
KAREN LEBLANC – NURSE.FIGHTER.BOY
CARINNE LEDUC – 3 Saisons
GABRIELLE ROSE – Mothers&Daughters
KARINE VANASSE – Polytechnique

PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTOR IN A SUPPORTING ROLE / INTERPRÉTATION MASCULINE DANS UN RÔLE DE SOUTIEN
PATRICK DROLET – De père en flic / Father and Guns
JOHN DUNSWORTH – Trailer Park Boys: Countdown to Liquor Day
MAXIM GAUDETTE – Polytechnique
RÉMY GIRARD – De père en flic / Father and Guns
SCOTT SPEEDMAN – Adoration

PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTRESS IN A SUPPORTING ROLE / INTERPRÉTATION FÉMININE DANS UN RÔLE DE SOUTIEN
LIANE BALABAN – One Week
MARIE BRASSARD – Les grandes chaleurs / Heat Wave
MARTHA BURNS – Love & Savagery
ISABEL RICHER – Babine
SONIA VACHON – 5150, rue des Ormes / 5150 Elm’s Way

ACHIEVEMENT IN ART DIRECTION, PRODUCTION DESIGN / MEILLEURE DIRECTION ARTISTIQUE
DIANA ABBATANGELO – NURSE.FIGHTER.BOY
SUSAN AVINGAQ – Before Tomorrow
JEAN BABIN – Grande ourse: La clé des possibles / The Master Key
EVE STEWART – Fifty Dead Men Walking
PATRICE VERMETTE – 1981

ACHIEVEMENT IN CINEMATOGRAPHY / MEILLEURES IMAGES
STEVE COSENS – NURSE.FIGHTER.BOY
JONATHAN FREEMAN – Fifty Dead Men Walking
PIERRE GILL – Polytechnique
RONALD PLANTE – Grande ourse: La clé des possibles / The Master Key
ALLEN SMITH – Les doigts croches / Sticky Fingers

ACHIEVEMENT IN COSTUME DESIGN / MEILLEURS COSTUMES
ATUAT AKITTIRQ – Before Tomorrow
CARMEN ALIE – Grande ourse: La clé des
possibles / The Master Key
SARAH ARMSTRONG – NURSE.FIGHTER.BOY
BRENDA BROER – Cairo Time
ANNE-KARINE GAUTHIER – 1981

ACHIEVEMENT IN EDITING / MEILLEUR MONTAGE
ALAIN BARIL – 5150, rue des Ormes / 5150 Elm’s Way
RICHARD COMEAU – Polytechnique
FRANÇOIS NORMANDIN, JIM DONOVAN – 3 Saisons
MICHEL GROU – Grande ourse: La clé des possibles / The Master Key
JIM MUNRO – Fifty Dead Men Walking

ACHIEVEMENT IN MAKE-UP / MEILLEURS MAQUILLAGES
DJINA CARON, MARTIN RIVEST – Polytechnique
DJINA CARON – Grande ourse: La clé des possibles / The Master Key
DIANE SIMARD, RÉJEAN GODERRE – Love & Savagery
MICHELINE TRÉPANIER, LINDA GORDON – 1981
ROBBI O’QUINN, LEANNE MORRISON-FREED – You Might As Well Live

ACHIEVEMENT IN MUSIC – ORIGINAL SCORE / MEILLEURE MUSIQUE ORIGINALE
BENOÎT CHAREST – Polytechnique
BERTRAND CHÉNIER – Love & Savagery
CHRISTIAN CLERMONT – 5150, rue des Ormes / 5150 Elm’s Way
NORMAND CORBEIL – Grande ourse: La clé des possibles / The Master Key
BEN MINK – Fifty Dead Men Walking

ACHIEVEMENT IN MUSIC – ORIGINAL SONG / MEILLEURE CHANSON ORIGINALE
SUSAN AVINGAQ – Before Tomorrow – Pamani
JOHN WELSMAN, CHERIE CAMP – NURSE.FIGHTER.BOY – Oh Love
SARI DAJANI, IOHANN MARTIN, RUDY TOUSSAINT, JOHN VON AICHLINGER – Les grandes chaleurs / Heat Wave – Bon Swa

ACHIEVEMENT IN OVERALL SOUND / MEILLEUR SON D’ENSEMBLE
MARIO AUCLAIR, DANIEL BISSON, LUC BOUDRIAS, JEAN-CHARLES DESJARDINS – Grande ourse: La clé des possibles / The Master Key
STÉPHANE BERGERON, PIERRE BLAIN, JO CARON, BENOÎT LEDUC – Polytechnique
CLAUDE HAZANAVICIUS, DANIEL BISSON, JEAN-CHARLES DESJARDINS, BERNARD GARIÉPY STROBL – Love & Savagery
RICHARD LAVOIE, ARNAUD DERIMAY, JEAN-CHARLES DESJARDINS, BERNARD GARIÉPY STROBL – Before Tomorrow
SIMON GOULET, BERNARD GARIÉPY STROBL – 5150, rue des Ormes / 5150 Elm’s Way

ACHIEVEMENT IN SOUND EDITING / MEILLEUR MONTAGE SONORE
PIERRE-JULES AUDET, MICHELLE CLOUTIER, JACQUES PLANTE, JEAN-FRANÇOIS SAUVÉ – Grandeourse: La clé des possibles / The Master Key
MATHIEU BEAUDIN, JACQUES PLANTE – 5150, rue des Ormes / 5150 Elm’s Way
CLAUDE BEAUGRAND, GUY FRANCOEUR, CAROLE GAGNON, CHRISTIAN RIVEST – Polytechnique
GARRETT KERR, FRED BRENNAN, PAUL GERMANN, STEVE HAMMOND, MISHANN LAU – NURSE.FIGHTER.BOY
OLIVIER CALVERT, NATALIE FLEURANT, FRANCINE POIRIER, LISE WEDLOCK – Babine

BEST FEATURE LENGTH DOCUMENTARY / MEILLEUR LONG MÉTRAGE DOCUMENTAIRE
A HARD NAME – Kristina McLaughlin, Michael McMahon, Alan Zweig
LES DAMES EN BLEU / LADIES IN BLUE – Claude Demers
INSIDE HANA’S SUITCASE – Larry Weinstein, Rudolf Biermann, Jessica Daniel
PROM NIGHT IN MISSISSIPPI – Patricia Aquino, Paul Saltzman
RIP: A REMIX MANIFESTO – Mila Aung-Thwin, Kat Baulu, Brett Gaylor, Germaine Ying-Gee Wong

BEST SHORT DOCUMENTARY / MEILLEUR COURT MÉTRAGE DOCUMENTAIRE
THE DELIAN MODE – Kara Blake, Marie-Josée Saint-Pierre
PASSAGES – Marie-Josée Saint-Pierre
PETROPOLIS: AERIAL PERSPECTIVES ON THE ALBERTA TAR SANDS – Peter Mettler, Sandy Hunter, Laura Severinac

BEST LIVE ACTION SHORT DRAMA / MEILLEUR COURT MÉTRAGE DRAMATIQUE
DANSE MACABRE – Pedro Pires, Catherine Chagnon
GILLES – Constant Mentzas
PRINCESS MARGARET BLVD. – Dan Montgomery, Kazik Radwanski
TERRE DES HOMMES / LAND OF MEN – Ky Nam Le Duc
LA VIE COMMENCE / LIFE BEGINS – Élaine Hébert, Émile Proulx-Cloutier

BEST ANIMATED SHORT / MEILLEUR COURT MÉTRAGE D’ANIMATION
RUNAWAY / TRAIN EN FOLIE – Derek Mazur, Cordell Barker, Michael Scott
THE SPINE / L’ÉCHINE – Steven Hoban, Chris Landreth, Marcy Page
VIVE LA ROSE – Michael Fukushima, Bruce Alcock, Annette Clarke, Tina Ouellette

Smattering of Festival Posters

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Although we don’t get to all that many festivals throughout the year (especially the ones overseas), we’re of course big fans of the festival circuit here in the third row. Courtesy of BlueFaqs, we’ve got a whole slew of random festival posters to admire and share. We’ve only posted the film ones here, but if you head over to BluFaqs, they’ve got a bunch more for all sorts of festivals around the globe; from culinary arts to literature and music.

Some of them I can’t even tell what they’re for; they just look cool. Have a look at a couple below and then several more of the film festival art works under the seats. Feel free to click on any of the images for a larger version and head to BlueFaqs for a whole lot more – the jazz and lit posters are awesome.

Moore and Meyers fight terror in Shelter trailer

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Though around these parts our writers and readers are likely to get excited at the prospect of seeing the great Julianne Moore in action, I must admit that I’m particularly excited to see Måns Mårlind and Björn Stein’s Shelter for the opportunity to see Jonathan Rhys Meyers in action.

Shelter feels like a bit of a rehash of a number of other project all thrown into the mix and though the trailer doesn’t exactly scream awesome, it does suggest a solid thriller in which Moore plays Dr. Cara Jessup, a forensic psychiatrist whose patient (Meyers) apparently suffers from multiple personality disorder, a disorder she has essentially discredited. Things go wrong, a mystery unfolds and from the looks of things, Dr. Jessup is divided between science and her faith.

This could go either way but I’m curious to see if it’s elevated beyond mediocrity by the great cast.

Shelter opens in the UK on April 9th and though there’s also talk of North American distribution later in the year, dates are yet to be announced.

Trailer tucked under the seat!

Third Annual Row Three Oscar Live Blog Announced!

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

They’re almost here! Good thing too because I need another excuse to use my cow bell before World Cup action kicks off in June. Obviously, I’m talking about the Oscars and we’re getting ready for a whole lot of action.

As per previous years, we’re going to be sharing the evening with the readers via a highly entertaining live chat/blog which last year proved to be so exciting, it was more entertaining than the show itself (I know, not too much of a stretch). Considering all of the changes to this year’s show, it’s bound to give us a lot to talk about besides the rivalry between James Cameron and Kathryn Bigelow.

So come on by on Sunday, March 7th to join in the fun. The show starts at 5PM pacific time but we’ll likely kick things off at 4:30PM or so with a call for shooters every time Andrew mentions how awesome Penelope Cruz looks.

So mark your calendar, set your reminder, make your trip to the liquor store early, be sure to enter our Oscar Pool Contest and then tune in on Sunday!

And yes, we’ll remind you again on Friday.

Row Three New Design

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Guess what everyone. It is time again for us contributors to become bored with our site. When this happens I end up spending a bunch of time (which is actually a lot of fun as I love playing with the design) in long discussions with the contributors, many design committee meetings and finally many hours sitting in front of my computer banging my head against the table when the design is 2 pixels off.

Seriously though, I hope everyone enjoys the tweaked look for Row Three. I am sure there are glitches (like I just noticed that I forgot to do a search box) and I appreciate everyone’s patience while I fix the them. If do you notice something that doesn’t look right or is down right broken feel free to send an email to john@rowthree.com and I’ll fix it as soon as possible.

Oh and don’t forget there are only a few more days to enter in the Oscar Pool!

Also… don’t you just love freaking out cats.

Mother 2010 coming to thrill you

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Want to experience a thrilling experience? Then, wait for the release of the upcoming Hollywood movie, Mother. Set to be released on March 12^th, 2010 worldwide, Mother will thrill you with its exciting plot. Due to the presence of some sexual content and violence, this movie has grabbed an R MPAA Rating.

Magnolia Pictures is behind the successful distribution of Mother, the movie. This movie will show you exceptional performances by actors like Kim Hye-Ja, Won Bin, Jin Gu and Yun Je-mun. Director Bong Joon Ho has directed this movie with the best of his capability.

Mother has been co-produced by producers, Miky Lee and Katharine Kim. It is a movie about a single mom, Hye-ja, who has a 27 year old son, Do-joon. Her son is an adult in age but always dependent on his mother. Watch out this movie to see how foolishly her son behaves throughout the movie.

The suspense in this movie begins when, Do-joon follows a girl, who suddenly disappears in the dark. Also known as, Madeo, Mother has a running duration of 2 hour and 9 minutes. This thrilling drama movie has been majorly shot in South Korea.

Shutter Island Releasing Soon

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Coming February 19^th, 2010, get ready to watch another action movie of the year. Shutter Island is set to be released for all you Leonardo DiCarpio fans. The movie has an R MPAA Rating for its violent content and nudity. This action cum thriller movie will keep you interested to know what happens next for its whole running duration of 2 hours and 18 minutes.

Shutter Island has been distributed by none other than, Paramount Pictures and Sony Pictures Releasing International. The movie has been co-produced by Dennis Lehane, Louis Philips and Laeta Kalogridis. Shutter Island has been shot at Medfield in USA and Seoul in South Korea.

This movie is about two U.S. marshals, named; Teddy Daniels and Chuck Aule. In the movie you will see how these two marshals are summoned to a remote island located at the coast of Massachusetts in order to investigate the sudden disappearance of a murderess. They are there to search the island’s fortress from where the murderess got disappeared.

Shutter Island has an impressive star cast that comprises of stars like Leonardo DiCarpio, Ben Kingsley, Mark Ruffalo, Michelle Williams and Max von Sydow. Martin Scorsese is behind the successful direction of this much-awaited Hollywood movie.

Peter Andre has got the sex out of his system

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Peter Andre has admitted to enjoying sex sessions with former page three girl Maddy Ford, but insisted that he is done with female relations for a while.

After Maddy sold her story to a Sunday newspaper, Peter told The Mirror:

“Yes, I had sex – but only after my divorce came through, and I always said that I would not think about moving on until after my divorce was finalised. I dipped my toe back into the water and got badly burnt. What a mistake that was!”

“I’m gutted. But I’ve got it out of my system. I don’t want to go there with anyone else again now, not unless I know it’s serious.

“The children are my priority, and always will be – not a new woman.”

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X Factor Sharon Osbourne brands Dannii Minogue ‘Fking useless’

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Sharon Osbourne has reignited her feud with pregnant Dannii Minogue, saying that the Australian singer was ‘F**king useless’ on The X factor.

Sharon was chatting to The Guardian about young people who are desperate for fame on talent competitions.

Osbourne commented: “They’re queuing up now to get on – what’s that show called – We’ve Got No F**king Talent At All. It’s like a revolving door for tw*ts.”

When it was implied that she may be being a bit hypocritical as she was a judge on X Factor and still sits on the America’s Got Talent panel Sharon blasted:

“Listen, I actually walked from X Factor because I couldn’t stand the bulls**t anymore.

“I was getting well paid – very well paid – so it was hard to leave, but I did because they didn’t like me speaking the truth. They’d rather have some doll like Dannii Minogue as judge, endorsing this bulls**t.

“Dannii – I couldn’t stand her. She wasn’t so much a dim bulb as a bulb in a power cut. F**king useless.”

Cheryl Cole tells Ashley’s mum that it’s over

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Cheryl Cole has reportedly called time on her marriage to Ashley Cole, by telling his mum that she won’t be taking him back.

Cheryl is said to have had a friendly chat with her mother in law Sue last weekend, in which she made it clear that her marriage to Ashley is definitely over.

A source told The Mirror: “Sue has been trying to act as intermediary between Cheryl and Ashley and doing her best to help them patch up their differences. She loves Cheryl and obviously hates seeing her son hurt.

“Cheryl has been going through so much pain she initially didn’t want to take any calls – even from her mother-in-law.

“But they finally spoke and Cheryl made clear there is no going back. The marriage is over and she can’t take him back.

“They spoke calmly and fondly to one another and there was certainly no screaming or shouting.

“When Sue passed on the message, Ashley was gutted. The wedding ring came off. He’s cocked up big-time. Now he needs to face up to his actions.”

Katie Price’s fury over Peter Andre Maddy Ford’s sex sessions

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Katie Price is reportedly furious with her ex-husband Peter Andre, after finding out he had been lying to the media about his sex life. Despite claiming that he was celibate since his split from Katie, Peter has recently admitted to enjoying three months of romps with former page three girl Maddy Ford.

When she heard the news Katie reportedly screamed:

“He’s a lying b******.”

The Sun also quote her as saying:

“He’s been saying he hasn’t had sex, but all along he has. He’s made out like he’s got this whiter than white image but he’s no saint.”

The Daily Star quote Katie as blasting:

“I have never deceived anyone. Nobody can knock the fact that I have been up front from the word go about my relationship with Alex.

“I made it clear the moment I was with someone else. All that time Peter has been on my back about what I have been getting up to with Alex – but he is no different.”

And she told a pal: “He has lied for the last few months while publicly claiming he is the Messiah.”

A friend of Peter Andre claimed that the ‘Behind Closed Doors’ singer is feeling betrayed by Maddy.

One said: “It looks like she planned a kiss-and-tell all along. She had every date and detail recorded like she had a diary on their romance so she could bring it up again.”

Britain’s Got Talent 2010 Amanda Holden says Simon Cowell is ‘naughty giggly and silly’

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Amanda Holden has admitted that her Britain’s Got Talent boss Simon Cowell has completely changed since he fell in love.

Amanda claims that Simon couldn’t keep his hands off his girlfriend Mezhgan Hussainy during recent BGT auditions. He is reportedly planning to marry the stunning 36 year old later this year.

Amanda, 39, told Fabulous mag: “He’s a different man – more naughty, giggly and silly. It’s adorable. Trust me, this girl is The One!”

Paul Abdul won’t compete on Dancing With The Stars 2010

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Dancing With The Stars won’t be revealing their full lineup until later this week, however we already know one celebrity who definitely won’t be taking part – Paula Abdul.

TMZ are reporting that ABC offered Paula a ridiculous amount of money to do the show, but the former American Idol judge turned it down.

Paula is still reportedly in talks about joining the judging panel of Simon Cowell’s new X Factor production.

Emily Atack leaves Dancing On Ice 2010

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Emily Atack has become the eighth celebrity to be voted off ITV’s Dancing On Ice.

Despite achieving her highest judges scores of the series, tonight Emily found herself in the skate off for the second time. Emily skated against the skilled Danniella Westbrook and unsurprisingly four out of the five judges chose to save Westbrook.

After her final performance Emily was almost in tears when she said:

‘I’ve tried so hard and I did my best. I’m just proud I made it to the eighth show.’

On hearing her fate she added:

‘I have had the most unbelievable time. It’s changed my life literally. It’s given me so much discipline! It has been such a privilege working with Jayne and Chris.’

Dancing On Ice 2010 Kyran Bracken ‘judges favour Hayley Tamaddon’

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

Former Dancing on Ice contestant Kyran Bracken has claimed that the judges are favouring former Emmerdale actress Hayley Tamaddon, over other contenders.

He told The Blue Room: “I feel the judges are reducing Hayley’s chances of winning the show.

“Jason [Gardiner] was spot on with a 4.5 as she stumbled and missed a step sequence, yet Daniella [Westbrook] skated really well and [still] came second.

“A few weeks ago Danniella skated clean and Hayley fell, but yet again Hayley came top of the leaderboard!

“The voting public do not like seeing misguided favouritism. I feel this will become more evident as the weeks go by.”

He added: “If this keeps up I believe by the final, the public will be more likely to pick up the phone for others.

“Maybe Hayley realises this and that’s why she thanked Jason for his fair mark?”

Discuss Did You Name Your Pet After A Movie?

Fri, 12 Mar 2010 00:00:00 +0100

So this weekend I bought a pet fish. Yeah, that's about the biggest animal I can get where I live. Anyway, the purchase of the fish was easy. Naming it was not. As a movie buff, I sometimes feel obligated to be all-movie-related and if I get a pet (or one day have a child) give him or her a name that reflects a favorite film. But is that cheesy? Or obvious? Certainly naming the fish something fishy film-related is pretty silly. No naming him Nemo. Or her Wanda. I kinda wanted to name him/her Madison, but again that would provoke too many guests saying the same, "oh, I get it. Splash. Har har."

Another idea was to name the fish Asta, both a reference to my favorite pet in a movie and a somewhat sad acknowledgment that I can't have a dog instead. But no, that wouldn't be fair to the fish. And anyway, it would be a sad reminder that I can't have a dog instead. My girlfriend unfortunately already previously used the best celebrity-as-pet-name idea: Fisher Stevens. Meanwhile, I don't have enough of a favorite actor to name him by. Possibly to the disappointment of you readers, we named him Jupiter. It's a long story (and, yes, I have other interests), but the important thing is it's not a story that's cinematical in nature in any way.

But it got me wondering about the rest of you. Surely some have pets -- dogs, cats, snakes, fish, whatever -- named for movies, movie characters or favorite actors, actors or filmmakers. And I'm curious what they are. And, well, if you want to go further and admit to naming your kids after something or someone film-related, go ahead with that, too.

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