I've done some crazy things while stuck in traffic, like piss in a Big Gulp cup or give a handjob to my passenger, but I've never wandered the damn highway. That's why Amy Wino did in London today. Wino was stuck with several other motorists as they waited for an accident to clear.

Wino couldn't sit still, so she got out of her car and started asking the other motorists for a ciggie light. She also showed off fresh cuts all over her arm. Ugh. Let's just throw her in a FedEx box and send her to Tommy Girl. She'll come out talking like a robot and smiling like a Stepford wife, but that's better than this shit.

I'm all for looking like a truck stop crack whore, but this is ridiculous.

If those ballet slippers could talk..... Actually, they wouldn't talk. They would just scream in terror.